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I favor the "I'm sorry but I can't make it. Happy birthday!" answer.
The OP wants to decline with an excuse while avoiding dishonesty. If you feel you really need any excuse, and assuming you don't have to answer on the spot, just make some plans and then you can say, "I'm sorry but I have already made other plans for that day. Happy birthday!"
I don't get what the big thing is about lying. We all tell social lies for a variety of reasons. The classic lie is the answer to, "Honey, does this dress make me look fat?" Only a crazy man doesn't know the correct answer is some variation of "no."
For this reason I favor the solution I stated at the top of my post. Just get over the guilt of not being truthful. Or justify yourself by imagining you had intended to have a quiet night at home that day.
I don't really know this person well enough, I don't hate them, but they are quite annoying and in your face to say the least
I suppose "Hell will freeze over before I'd ever show up at something like that" is inappropriate?
I suggest you close your response with a cheerful "Happy Birthday!" or "Have fun at your birthday party!" rather than just politely declining. It costs you nothing to wish them well.
Didn't want to start a new thread, but I had a co-worker invited me and my husband to "an event" at his home Wednesday night with the question, "You like to travel, don't you?" Sensing a business-type (sales) presentation or scheme similar to a well-known home-based soap products company (not to name names), I asked him why, and he said something like, "Oh, I can't give you any details." I just looked at him -- we are friendly, btw, so I didn't wan to offend him --and said that I didn't want to get involved in anything involving sales. He got a little embarrassed, but just said, "Oh, okay."
Again, it is possible to decline anything without being flat-out rude about it; and I think it is essential when it comes to self-protection.
Didn't want to start a new thread, but I had a co-worker invited me and my husband to "an event" at his home Wednesday night with the question, "You like to travel, don't you?" Sensing a business-type (sales) presentation or scheme similar to a well-known home-based soap products company (not to name names), I asked him why, and he said something like, "Oh, I can't give you any details." I just looked at him -- we are friendly, btw, so I didn't wan to offend him --and said that I didn't want to get involved in anything involving sales. He got a little embarrassed, but just said, "Oh, okay."
Again, it is possible to decline anything without being flat-out rude about it; and I think it is essential when it comes to self-protection.
Your handling of the situation shows that you have great poise.
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Only a crazy man doesn't know the correct answer is some variation of "no."
