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I can relate to the OP, because I had a really bad experience with therapy when I was 9. I didn't understand the point, but I was too timid to protest, despite the weird vibe I picked up. The therapist would ask me questions how I felt about whatever (teacher criticizing me, parents lecturing me, etc.), only to turn around and not believe me, like "no, you did not feel that". Which made me "realize" that the therapist wasn't on my side at all. Luckily, I was pulled out of therapy not too long after.
Despite it happening at a young age, it soured me on therapy for life. I mean, really, "no, you did not feel that"?
I know, right? What gives them the nerve to tell YOU what YOU feel? I saw a child shrink when I was fourteen, and all she did was go on and on about how I am upset with my mother (which I wasn't) and completely ignored every one of my other concerns.
It's like they prefer reading textbooks and making decisions based on what they say to actually talking to clients.
during my last attempt at trying therapy to enrich my life. I am 80% happy with my life as is. I learned that there is 2 types of therapy. The one where they reach back to you childhood & put you under microscope. I didn't want that and sounds like OP doesn't want that. The other is CBT therapy, behavior base therapy where you work on one specific area of life & get action items to take home and practice. It is sort of like social personal trainer. I liked it.
You should look into that. Make it clear to your therapist from start, I am looking for CBT type therapy & I don't want to talk about my childhood or change myself complete. Here is the area of my life I want to improve, tell me how
The other is CBT therapy, behavior base therapy where you work on one specific area of life & get action items to take home and practice. It is sort of like social personal trainer. I liked it.
...
Make it clear to your therapist from start, I am looking for CBT type therapy & I don't want to talk about my childhood or change myself complete. Here is the area of my life I want to improve, tell me how
Yes, this is what I am getting in therapy and I really like her.
you don't make any sense. If you are sooo happy with yourself and your disorders, why do you go to a shrink? People go to shrinks because they are unhappy. They want to be more normal. You complain that the shrinks tries to get you more normal.
Like I said: I went in to deal with maladaptive daydreaming, and they pulled out the old "talk about your feelings" crap and started critiquing my lifestyle.
Quote:
You state you need this to be happy: Staying away from people, porn, altar, music - so why not do exactly that and be happy???
Because for those things, I need a job. And to have a job I need to stop the "After so many long months on the arduous, the port of Rapta appeared. It was a small thing, with only four docks. The water was as blue as the sky. Even from the distance we could hear the drums of the natives and see the bushy cinnamon trees. I smiled at Amos, happy that his part of the journey was complete. But for me and my commander, the journey had just begun. Beyond the southern most port of Azania was the fabled lands of king Lemba kings. And there, by the grace of God, we shall reclaim the lost Ark and..."
Suddenly I realize I was working an Excel spreadsheets.
That's all I went to see a shrink for, and yet they want to talk about how I prefer porn to touching a human, how I like to sit alone and read instead of being around people, and how I don't really love anyone other than my cat.
I know, right? What gives them the nerve to tell YOU what YOU feel? I saw a child shrink when I was fourteen, and all she did was go on and on about how I am upset with my mother (which I wasn't) and completely ignored every one of my other concerns.
My parents signed me up for therapy because my grades in school declined from the previous year, not realizing that 4th grade is when subjects skyrocket in difficulty level. The shrink seemed like a nice man on the surface (he was polite to me and put up with my rambling), but I kept getting weird vibes when the questions started. He turned out to be a run-of-the-mill "feelings doctor", as opposed to an academic life coach of sorts. The kind my parents must have expected. Possibly my teacher too, since she was the one who told them I was "not applying myself".
I think parents sometimes view child shrinks as Apple Store techs for humans. Like, "it's not working, fix it". I understand the analogy all too well, since I work in the IT field.
Last edited by MillennialUrbanist; 02-09-2017 at 01:09 PM..
Because for those things, I need a job. And to have a job I need to stop the "After so many long months on the arduous, the port of Rapta appeared. It was a small thing, with only four docks. The water was as blue as the sky. Even from the distance we could hear the drums of the natives and see the bushy cinnamon trees. I smiled at Amos, happy that his part of the journey was complete. But for me and my commander, the journey had just begun. Beyond the southern most port of Azania was the fabled lands of king Lemba kings. And there, by the grace of God, we shall reclaim the lost Ark and..."
Suddenly I realize I was working an Excel spreadsheets.
There are meds that help your focus. Has this been brought up?
By the way, if that's original, you're a good writer. While you're not working, why not write?
OP: I applaud you for sharing yourself with us, that's not as easy as some may think it is. There are those who post on forums and put on a front that 'they are like most people, so they must be normal' . . .whatever normal is.
Some of the replies you've received appeared pretty harsh and some even condesending; hopefully they didn't intend to be perceived that way.
I went to a therapist and one of the things that seemed odd to me is that as soon as I walked into her office she ran over and gave me a big hug. I'm not a 'hugger type' personality and it felt very uncomfortable to have a complete stranger do that. As far as what transpired during the sessions, it was mainly,
"Tell me all about yourself."
"Why are you here?"
"What do you expect the outcome to be?"
"Why do you think you feel that way?"
"What do you think you can do to change your life?"
That was the first session; subsequent sessions were more on the line of, "Well, tell me what you've done to improve yourself since we last visited."
I could have asked myself those same questions and spent the money elsewhere.
As far as being a daydreamer, good for you! Thank goodness Alexander Graham Bell and Thomas Alva Edison were daydreamers - as well as the majority of other great inventors.
Being unique is what each of us are; however, there are those who have difficulty being an individual and not following the crowd.
As it has been said, "What's right, is what's right for each person."
I quit therapy a few months ago after it was getting me nowhere. I was diagnosed with ASPD (a sociopath) and later two different shrinks gave me a new diagnosis that I was NOT happy with. At least a sociopath would have some aura of "cool" attached to it, and I could make "Bad to the Bone" my entrance music. Instead...I'm schizotypal (STPD) Basically, it's a big, shrinkspeak way of saying I'm a weirdo. It has no negative impact on my life whatsoever aside from the maladaptive daydreaming that costed me my job because it was hard to focus (I'll find another one soon enough, so it's fine) I've started working on that myself and I can stay in reality now long enough to get things done.
Was your "re-diagnosis" based purely on lack of focus & daydreaming? If it were based on that alone I'd think it was an over-emphasis on one of the criteria in neglect of the others. If anything, the criteria that deserves to carry some extra weight would be your veiws on other people. Do you fear & suspect others or do you find them... irrelevant? Do you see others as obstacles or major players?
Basically; are you the Predator (ASPD) or are you the Prey (STPD)? I mean; thats kind of an important distinction. The "dead God & candles" stuff, likely did not help. Paranormal/superstitious interests are typically not found in ASPD but frequently found in STPD.
"I've started working on that myself and I can stay in reality now long enough to get things done."
So you don't see therapy as having any part in this? Did your meds change? Some times people can cycle in & out of being more than to less than functional on their own but if it's been a consistent improvement maybe therapy has helped?
Quote:
Originally Posted by victorianpunk
Whenever I talk about my issues, shrinks always try to get me to change my thinking. Why? If I'm happy, what's the harm? And they will often try to change the subject to THEM. I say I hate humanity, they say "well I'm a human." They just don't get that a shrink is a function and not a person. They are for my mental health what the barista at Starbucks is for my coffee: just a function to get me what I'm paying for. I realized that developing a relationship and trust (hurl!) are what they're trying to do. And the fact that I am not interested in relationships and trust doesn't stop them.
Anyone else notice this? How shrinks try to make people change who they are just to conform with a worthless society, as opposed to helping people be the best selves they can be?
It's because STPD is thought to originate from maladaptive attachments in early childhood so they are trying to role model a healthy attachment. Maybe it's annoying because you said you did have a reasonably "attached" childhood experience so to you, the communication just feels out of context.
Obviously I'm just winging it here; I'm not a doctor but you didn't come here looking for one. As long as your reasonably functional for employment & not a potential harm to yourself or others you are not doing anything "wrong".
Atypical maybe but sometimes typical is over rated.
I am bipolar and anxiety disorder, with anti-social behavior and Seasonal Affective Disorder {S.A.D.}.
I shun the outside world during long winter months, and stay indoors with day light lights.
I go shopping at 5 am to avoid people.
I don't belong to any groups or organizations.
I find my therapist to be soothing, and is a good "friend" with whom I can bounce goals, dreams and ideas off. SHe doesn't try to make me conform, in fact she says it helps to understand my workings and disorders with my therapy.
I always feel better talkign to her, she's like a good friend, a mother figure, and therapist all in one.
My previous therapist? he was a jerk, butthole and told me it 'was all in my head"...{well DUH! that IS what mental illness IS...problems in the brain chemistry}
SO maybe your therapist isn't for you, maybe you need a different one.
My therapist now is great!
My psychiatrist, on the ohter hand....but she claims to be over worked [and naturally underpaid} thank goodness i only have to see her once every three months..speaking of which it's next week I see her
Best of luck to yuou!
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