Why do people that dine alone get seated near bathrooms? (discrimination, weight)
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When you are going out to eat at a restaurant alone, what makes the host/hostess seat you near the bathrooms or near the kitchen?! I feel like no one, single or in a group, wants to be near the restrooms, trashcans, and/or kitchen when eating out. (Why are there seats near those areas anyway?)
I have been observing when I go out to eat by myself it's like they automatically put me near that area, and then when I tell them id rather sit somewhere else, they low-key act like it's a problem. Sometimes when I have a friend or two with me, the seating area is a little bit better. Occasionally, they will direct me to the bar to sit, and I go there, but most of the time it's near the EXIT/restrooms/kitchen/trashcans. Are people that work in restaurants taught to purposely seat customers that are by themselves near that kind of area? Or does it depend on how the person looks and the vibe they give off? If it is about saving space in case some huge group shows up...well I still feel like it is rude! (especially when the restaurant isn't that busy)
Sometimes im tired and stressed (like when I get off of work) when I go to eat out, but I make an effort to smile and be polite anyway, and I STILL get seated in the back of the restaurant...basically solitary confinement it feels like!
No idea where to put this, so if Psychology does not fit, please let me know!
IDK, OP; I can't remember when that last happened to me, but it was a long time ago. Half the time, I'm told to pick the table I want. I think it's ok to politely but firmly indicate you'd prefer a table closer to the front of the restaurant, or along a side wall, or whatever.
You're a paying customer, like everyone else. In fact, if there's one place where you've been a repeat customer, and they keep doing this, I'd say, if they act like it's an imposition to give you a better location, "Thank you, I'll go elsewhere, if the back table is all you have", and walk out.
Singles are such a significant percent of the population these days, that I'd think businesses can't treat them like 2nd-class citizens.
IDK, OP; I can't remember when that last happened to me, but it was a long time ago. Half the time, I'm told to pick the table I want. I think it's ok to politely but firmly indicate you'd prefer a table closer to the front of the restaurant, or along a side wall, or whatever.
You're a paying customer, like everyone else. In fact, if there's one place where you've been a repeat customer, and they keep doing this, I'd say, if they act like it's an imposition to give you a better location, "Thank you, I'll go elsewhere, if the back table is all you have", and walk out.
Singles are such a significant percent of the population these days, that I'd think businesses can't treat them like 2nd-class citizens.
You make a good point, I will have to use that line next time I am out. Also, it seems like single people dining out are often forgot about or ignored (again based on my experience) because all the attention is focused on some huge group(s) that is dining out as well. Why should I have to be limited to where I eat and at what time because of the rushes that restaurants go through? Just because you are waiting on more people doesn't mean the crowd or tips will be better, and big groups of people can create a bigger mess to clean up after and straggle when it is time to close. Single people dining are people too and we have money to spend!
I made this joke to my family that one day I was going to create a business/restaurant that totally focuses on the person that eats alone vs. in a group for whatever reason just to see how it compares to how business's almost prefer large groups of people over sole patrons (every table would literally have ONE chair & I would not have seats near trashcans, restrooms or the kitchen!)
I don't know if its a concerted effort it depends on popularity of restaurant, when you arrive in shift staffing levels, etc... this old post may be helpful to your dining optimization:
As a former road warrior and also someone who worked as a server in grad school for about 18 months I would like to offer advice to 'one top' diners.
A) For best results and reception by a dining establishment, go early for lunch and let them know you will be done in an hour or go later than 1:15pm and you should be fine (unless its the type of establishment that only is open minimum lunch hours and you need to be done be a certain time.
B) I learned early in my road warrior days that as a one top diner you are best to go early in shift to get best service from kitchen and server. They generally will eagerly serve you in hopes of a quick turn. Your food will be generally better since it is the first of shift (this will vary depending on the type of establishment)
C) They have no idea how much someone will tip. But they will appreciate someone who can tell them what they want (make up their mind quickly). Especially diners who want something special or have dietary requirements.
D) If the dining establishment has a bar ask to eat at the bar if you must eat between noon and 1 or between 6 and 7pm
E) Simply put, they are a business and their considerations are naturally weighted to maximizing their capacity. If you go as a 'one top' at peak lunch or dinner and expect prime sit down service you are deluding yourself to the realities of the industry.
Basically, the default mindset of a server / dining establishment, is serving as best as possible with as many turns as possible. Unless you are at grandma's / ma& pa's type places where lingering is more often encouraged.
Hope this helps others in this situation.
Oh, and I'm a man and have been asked to eat at bar and it didn't phase me a bit as discrimination as well as being given the "Lonely Guy" Steve Martin table in middle of dining room (with seeming spot light) next to a romantic couple while at a Steakhouse in Miami.
People who eat alone are often seen as sad, lonely, etc. You always hear from people that they don't want to eat alone because it's embarrassing. I imagine the hosts are reacting to that stigma.
When you are going out to eat at a restaurant alone, what makes the host/hostess seat you near the bathrooms or near the kitchen?! I feel like no one, single or in a group, wants to be near the restrooms, trashcans, and/or kitchen when eating out. (Why are there seats near those areas anyway?)
I have been observing when I go out to eat by myself it's like they automatically put me near that area, and then when I tell them id rather sit somewhere else, they low-key act like it's a problem. Sometimes when I have a friend or two with me, the seating area is a little bit better. Occasionally, they will direct me to the bar to sit, and I go there, but most of the time it's near the EXIT/restrooms/kitchen/trashcans. Are people that work in restaurants taught to purposely seat customers that are by themselves near that kind of area? Or does it depend on how the person looks and the vibe they give off? If it is about saving space in case some huge group shows up...well I still feel like it is rude! (especially when the restaurant isn't that busy)
Sometimes im tired and stressed (like when I get off of work) when I go to eat out, but I make an effort to smile and be polite anyway, and I STILL get seated in the back of the restaurant...basically solitary confinement it feels like!
No idea where to put this, so if Psychology does not fit, please let me know!
For now on just tell them a table for two and you are waiting for your friend. Then do as usual: order your beverage, scan menu, then say oh my friend won't be able to make it. 😜😜😜
Even a Lonestar diner is still eating with others. It's the proximity that seems of debate. I absolutely can sit by myself or with others..Either way..I'm picking up my utensils and eating just fine.
I hadn't really thought of location...Though I do find seated under an overpowered AC vent does make it less tolerable. Half the time I can't even find the restrooms...I think they deliberately want to have a laugh when giving directions...
I go out to eat once a month with three friends to different nice restaurants. At one particular restaurant, they tend to seat us in an out of the way location, even though we go early and have reservations. We are older women and I think they don't want the image of a group of old ladies by the entrance, which is where one of the women prefers to sit.
Doesn't bother me but bothers my friend and she has sometimes requested a different table.
I have never minded eating alone and if I am in a nice restaurant when traveling, I simply take a book with me to occupy my time while waiting. I have, in the past, known women who when meeting me for a meal, will not go in and take a seat until I arrive. They don't feel comfortable being seated alone, even though they are waiting for someone to join them. Never understood that.
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