How to handle being shamed and criticized for having pets over children

[otterhere]

In my experience, the choice to have children is almost entirely selfish. Let me count the ways: to fit in, to conform, to please family and friends and society in general, for tax write-offs, for entertainment, to dress up like little dolls and show off, to vicariously live their dreams through, to provide a child-centered social life, to avoid being alone on holidays or any day, to serve as caregivers in their own old age (many get surprises there), to brag to others about on social media, as an excuse to attempt or accomplish nothing else with their own lives, to feed their egos as "mini-me's." I could go on! And finally, most have children simply because they lack the imagination to think outside the box and realize that it's entirely optional. If you really want to do good in this world, adopt a homeless pet suffering in a shelter.

[49ersfan27]

Why aren't you married or have kids? You're almost 28!

Me: I didn't realize it was a life requirement or any of your business.

That does the trick and they never ask me about it again.

[carnivalday]

Originally Posted by FlaLadyB

I am sitting here reading the multitude of answers -- reminds me (I do not have children either) of a time I was sitting having snacks with 3 other female friends. Each of them talking about their (grown) kids.
I happened to say,
"gee, I'm glad I didn't have any kids"... much to the SHOCKED faces of all three of them.
They all 3 started saying how great it was having their kids and this and that...and I said, REALLY?

First friend - YOU ... your kids are constantly being arrested and having YOU pay to bail them out. The thing is>> YOU KEEP DOING IT so they keep getting arrested. Why don't you just let them stay in jail and learn to fend for themselves! They aren't KIDS any more.

Second friend - and your kids - they won't ALLOW you to even visit them and if you do you have to stay in a HOTEL. They wouldn't even let you babysit your own granddaughter while they went ( WITHOUT ASKING YOU) to the movies. They insisted on hiring a babysitter that they pay $20 an hour for INSTEAD. AND your other son has never had a job.. and he's HOW OLD NOW ..40? Living off his wife working. Their baby... he won't EVEN take care of while his wife is at work! He takes off on GUYS WEEKENDS.... really? Hopefully the wife will wise up and dump his ass.

Third friend - oh and you - "my kids never did anything... Really? How about when the one moved in to YOUR HOUSE - didn't get a job and then wanted YOU TO MOVE OUT and wouldn't leave? How about when you were really sick and he didn't care... and then threatened not to let you see your Grandson ever again....just for starters.

Me.. I said again.. I'm GLAD I DON'T HAVE KIDS....because if they treated me like your's treat you..... I made the right decision.

Yes, when I was your age I heard all the awwwwwww's that came from people who asked... do you have any kids? and I said No, and the .."Oh, I'm so sorry for you. I'm not, I would say. I'm quite happy without them.

and for the person who told someone here you were SELFISH to not have children? Are you kidding me? Selfish is having kids you can't take care of. Having kids because you were not careful enough or too stupid not to wear protection. Or having kids because WELFARE PAYS YOU FOR EACH KID so you have more kids to get more money.


Now Im older and when people ask about kids, I gladly say... my kids have fur and 4 paws I smile and walk away... 'cause I can .....and pet my furbabies.

Hilarious. Reminds me of the time a friend of mine was having an awful time with a teenager....it hasnt gotten much better either. But anyway, she asked me why I didnt have kids. That after she had picked up her kid from juvenile detention. I told her "Ive seen your life and I dont want it".

That sums it up for me.

[fatality]

Cut off all contact with those people, I don't have any contact with my family anymore. I was never attractive to women so nobody else matters except my dog and I intend to keep it that way.

[danii]

I totally believe you owe NO ONE an explanation. This is a pet peeve of mine. Everyone is in everyone else's business.