"That's Just Who I Am" Excuse (depressed, husband, passive)
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I took exception to something a friend did, and she just answered "I guess I'm just a b*tch."
Same thinking, different phrasing. Both mean, "Live with it, I'm not going to accommodate you."
We have a local TV weatherman who says this all the time. He is a bully who insists on asking his colleagues (on the air) what they did or what they ate or where they went on the week-end but objects to answering the same questions from them and he does it in an obnoxious fashion.
He delights in defining himself as a middle-aged gray-haired guy as if that excuses his behavior.
He has legions of fans who see him as funny but those of us who don't have drifted away from the channel.
I have a family member who excuses her adult daughter's behavior with, "Oh, well! That's our Missy!"
When people voice this disclaimer they are admitting that they know their behavior is wrong but will do it anyway.
I've found that the words "Thank you. I'll try to do better." work wonders in the short term and, in the long term I've found it's actually worthwhile to try to do better, even if it's hard.
This reminds me of a funny blog I read about these men and dating. They ask for a well made up women, heels, fake nails, and full makeup, skydive off cliffs, roam deserts, size 0, tall, model during morning hours, adventurer during day, cooks like a chef, comes home perfect but they must accept them as they 'are.'
"That's just who I am" is TRUE because it IS who they are. Not everyone will be polite, courteous, well mannered, and treat you well all the time. Maybe you insulted and offended them in some way, and they are bad at hiding their disdain for you.
Fifteen years ago, I had a boss who made me hate myself because she kept telling me everything I was doing was rude and offensive. It was what I said and how I said it, she said. She said it out of love, but NO ONE wants to be judged like that. I walked on eggshells around her because I was scared of saying anything to her because I was afraid she was going to tell me I was rude. It was a TERRIBLE time for me working for her. Terrible for my self esteem and terrible for me emotionally. I cannot help my inherent personality.
Today, I am the same as I was 15 years ago, except that no one in my workplace calls me out for anything I say or do. And I do not call them out for anything they say or do either, and believe me, I'm not the only rude one here.
But the "I'm keeping it real" is a terrible excuse.
What gets me is they seem "proud" to basically come off as azz holes. Smh
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No she was just being a mean *****...
