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Old 03-11-2018, 01:58 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
40,585 posts, read 39,242,198 times
Reputation: 77062

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Quote:
Originally Posted by whocares811 View Post

*The exception is on Current Events and P&OC forums sometimes, in which I am very opinionated and often blunt, although I try very hard to never be actually insulting to other posters.
One person's "blunt" is another person's "insulting," apparently.

 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:06 PM
 
3,552 posts, read 1,028,833 times
Reputation: 2679
Bluntness should be avoided, especially when communicating with strangers. You have to know someone quite well to judge if their comments are well-meaning and brutally honest, vs hostile.

The same for teasing. A close friend might laugh at an apparent insult, because they know you don't really mean it. But an anonymous person at a web forum would have no idea you were just kidding.

I think everyone should ask themselves what they are trying to get from the forums. If you are trying to give yourself a jolt of self-righteous superiority, then you are probably hurting others.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:12 PM
 
Location: Honolulu, HI
5,367 posts, read 1,448,670 times
Reputation: 7658
The internet is full of hostile posters. When people can hide behind anonymity with no fear of actually meeting the person they are hostile to, they go wild.

Psychologically, there’s something going on in their personal life to be so unnecessarily hostile on the internet, even if it’s just an internet persona.

On CD, personal attacks aren’t allowed so some people try snide remarks instead which is sad.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:20 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
40,585 posts, read 39,242,198 times
Reputation: 77062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocko20 View Post
When people can hide behind anonymity with no fear of actually meeting the person they are hostile to, they go wild.
Absolutely.

That anonymity emboldens people, and the lack of accountability makes them forget they are "talking to" actual people.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:36 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
74,915 posts, read 66,598,132 times
Reputation: 71680
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaminhealth View Post
Real Experts???? There are no real experts, everyone is learning until the day they expire.

Bringing others down just boosts their Egos and they must need that.
Well, by "real experts" I'm referring not to matters of opinion, but to the factual aspects of relocation info, such as "X part of town has Y and Z amenities", or "lower rents can be found in this sector of town". That sort of thing. Believe it or not, there are people who dispute simple factual statements like that, and try to convince a new OP that those posting such info are wrong, have never lived in the city in question, are only pretending to be residents and get their info from Google Earth (seriously, I've seen that posted), and all kind of crazy things. It's bizarre.

I've also noticed that when someone posts in a city forum, asking about certain neighborhoods, like gated communities, they're told that no one on that sub-forum knows anything about high-end communities, and the OP should look elsewhere for info. Some members are hostile to people of a different socio-economic status than their own. Issues come out of the woodwork, and affect the functionality of the relo forums. I guess it means there are some very unhappy people behind the computer screen. It's kind of disturbing.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
40,585 posts, read 39,242,198 times
Reputation: 77062
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaminhealth View Post
Real Experts???? There are no real experts, everyone is learning until the day they expire.
Sure, we all learn all the time. But there absolutely are real experts in this world. Some people do know more than others, but a lot of people have a problem with that.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:49 PM
 
Location: Southern California
20,806 posts, read 6,961,546 times
Reputation: 13998
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kophi View Post
^This. Almost like clockwork.

Awhile back I was reading through a thread like this.
Granted, the OP of that thread was suggesting an
unconventional approach to handling a sticky situation,
but the irony (and I eventually articulated this as an
observer) was that the OP was repeatedly labeled "self-
righteous" in posts that were, themselves, self-righteous.
I must've hit a nerve because one response told me not
to be silly, in their attempt to justify the irony-meter-
breaking nature of the responses.


This is just speculation, but I have to wonder if some of
those posts are by design. Artificial stirring of the pot to
keep the platform going. I have to keep myself from asking
them how much they're getting paid to post these (now
eerily predictable) kinds of responses. No other forum I'm
on has this issue (yet).


-
On the "getting paid thing".. makes one wonder. I'm on 2 other forums and NOTHING like what goes on here goes on at these other two. Everyone is Civil.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:50 PM
 
5,917 posts, read 4,194,647 times
Reputation: 16313
Quote:
Originally Posted by whocares811 View Post
Unless I am seriously deluding myself, I strive to be pleasant and polite to everyone*.

*The exception is on Current Events and P&OC forums sometimes, in which I am very opinionated and often blunt, although I try very hard to never be actually insulting to other posters.
My reply here is not meant for YOU specifically...just want to say that up front.

One thing I'm certain of is that many people, in life and on CD, are indeed deluded about how nice they are. And how smart, balanced, and rational they are. There are many examples of flaming, angry people bemoaning how awful society has become, for instance...and misanthropes who cannot handle basic human interactions, never mind maintain the most basic human relationships. It's the old, "everyone is stupid except me" t-shirt.

CHances are, when you see the worst of this, a couple of clicks will show you the member is a frequent participant in the P&OC forum.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Winter Sucks View Post
It seems that many like to attack people who start threads with problems especially if it has to do with other people. They will side with the "other" person.
I see that a lot too, but I also see a lot of "new" or 1st time posters who come on with problems that stretch the bounds of credulity right from the get go. Frankly, I think is the work of a bunch of sockpuppets and members with multiple accounts, but whatever.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:51 PM
 
Location: Southern California
20,806 posts, read 6,961,546 times
Reputation: 13998
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Sure, we all learn all the time. But there absolutely are real experts in this world. Some people do know more than others, but a lot of people have a problem with that.
Some try to be experts about my body and what works, and NO ONE knows that but me, the owner of my body. No lab numbers, no MD's etc and certainly no person anywhere.
 
Old 03-11-2018, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
21,918 posts, read 23,260,283 times
Reputation: 46787
Quote:
Originally Posted by elhelmete View Post
I see that a lot too, but I also see a lot of "new" or 1st time posters who come on with problems that stretch the bounds of credulity right from the get go. Frankly, I think is the work of a bunch of sockpuppets and members with multiple accounts, but whatever.
That's definitely sometimes the case. It's either someone who's been back time and time again with different user names but who has the same specific problems, or it's someone who creates an unusual but plausible situation just to mess with the regulars. A lot of times people start out nice and helpful, but then realize that they're just wasting their time with a jerk who's messing around or has no interest in actual advice.
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