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Is anyone here familiar with the psychological concept called "fear of missing out?" And if so, do you ever experience it? The basic idea is that you find yourself mentally unsettled when you're unable to be a part of something, as though a huge opportunity is passing you by. Such as, you're invited to a party but you're away that weekend. While you should be excitied about your trip, you're instead bummed about missing the party.
I think I've always had this issue, but never had a name for it. In particular, I tend to struggle mentally when I have to choose between two activities that will occur at the same time. I suspect this stems from having a rather limited social life, and as such the two conflicting events might be the only things I have going on over a period of several weeks. It can be maddening to have a ton of free time on my hands and then have to say no to something I really want to do.
Sometimes I do this to an extreme. It actually happened to me twice this morning, and both occurrences are based on conflicts that might happen, but are far from definite. Both are also months away, so it's absurd that I'm even thinking about it right now.
Can anyone here relate to this topic?
So follow the trail.
get to the root of the fear.
If you fear missing out and its because of a limited social life, why do you fear a limited social life.?
Are there two things here? (1) Fear of missing out. (2) Actually missing out.
I missed out when Whiskey a Go Go and the other clubs on Sunset Strip were hot, och all the hot bands I missed, ones that became really big after their days in small clubs. I just kick myself all my favorite bands that I could have seen live in the '60s and '70s.
What am I doing about it? I started dating again, I'm seeking women that want to attend live music and dance in clubs. The music might be different today but music is still music, and the music of today will become the nostalgia of tomorrow. And anyway music is music is music, and dancing is dancing! All I need is a chick, a club and a band!
I can't travel back to the '60s and I can't be 20 again, but I can find a lady and we can see today's bands and we can still dance! That is how I am handling missing out. I think it is never too late. Until you pass. I keep saying I'm going to keep doing it until they have to take me down with tranq darts!
One of the things that I think of with this concept, isn't that everyone else will be enjoying a good time and I'm not, but the fear that I'll not have the opportunity in the future and I'll regret that I didn't do it when I had the chance. Like if it's a concert, what if that band breaks up and you never get to see them?
That's another good example. I do think these types of fears are more prevalent when the situations we're missing are more unique in nature.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonesg
If you fear missing out and its because of a limited social life, why do you fear a limited social life.?
I guess it's more frustration than fear in this case. I typically don't have a lot going on at any given time, so when I do have plans they take on a larger importance than they might for busier people. Imagine a three-week span during which I have two events that conflict, but absolutely nothing else on my calendar. This will cause me to agonize over making a choice, and I'll also be annoyed that one of the two events couldn't have happened at any other point during that time frame.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lovehound
I just thought of something...
Are there two things here? (1) Fear of missing out. (2) Actually missing out.
In my mind, these two things overlap. Fear of mising out can apply to situations where we try to do everything based on a belief that we'll otherwise miss a major opportunity. But then, in cases where we actually miss out on something, or have to choose between two events, our minds exaggerate the importance of what we missed and we start to fear "what could have been."
I am familiar with it but I don't think I've experienced it very often. I think people with certain personality types seem to have it more than others.
I see this with a lot of young people (under 30) who become weirdly entrenched in doing the same things, going to the same places, fearing new experiences, just like old people who are afraid of change.
One of them explained it was just this, FOMO. Too much choice and a fear that whatever they choose will be disappointing.
It's so strange to me. It's as if they feel like they have a limited number of experiences in life and are terrified of having the wrong one.
(really enjoyed this book, although I read it a while ago at this point, so my endorsement is somewhat dated. Ties in heavily with the topic of your post, hence me mentioning it)
there are specific treatment centers that specialize in this and they are pretty well filled up with young teens and even middle aged men who are addicted to social media or video gaming.
the wonderful thing about the internet is you can look up mental health groups like NAMI or self help groups in your area, contact a local hospital to see if they offer a support group....at the very least do seek some help with a therapist who specializes in this.... and they should be a great conduit for more groups or ways to handle this. Bright bright blessings and much good luck. All addictions should not be seen as a weakness, these are true and debilitating conditions thousands of people wage daily battles with.
Wait, what?
Sp, uh, what thread did you have in mind when you typed this comment? Because it can't possibly be this one.
(really enjoyed this book, although I read it a while ago at this point, so my endorsement is somewhat dated. Ties in heavily with the topic of your post, hence me mentioning it)
I haven't read the book, but did some online research on the concept last year and found it fascinating. I think there's a definite link between this concept and what we've been discussing here.
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