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We look for easy solutions to major life problems. I'm not saying don't do things you like to do, but if you've got a serious medical condition such as depression, fishing or rolling skating alone is not going to cure the issue. For those lucky folks who have never felt true depression, first, I'm very glad for you. But you can't really understand what a depressed person feels inside. And telling them to "find a hobby" is not helping in the long run.
That's not even to mention that I had (have) hobbies that I love, but when I'm at my mot depressed, the depression robs me of all positive feelings to the point where I start disliking my hobby.
I’d say that clinical depression is a whole other issue and the op perhaps should have clarified situational depression. As for unhappiness I regard myself a generally happy person whose had to deal with a lot of unhappy things. One situation plunged me into a year of crushing loss and misery. It certainly had nothing to do with being bored but apparently the minute you tell someone you are grieving they tell you need counseling and Prozac. Sometimes we need a safe group of friends or a place to vent.
A very wise man told me once that if something's depressing me and I've tried and tried to solve an issue, "Count to ten, and say eff-it".
I know this sounds glib but it may help someone.
A very wise man told me once that if something's depressing me and I've tried and tried to solve an issue, "Count to ten, and say eff-it".
I know this sounds glib but it may help someone.
Well that sounds useful. I really have no idea if I've suffered from the hardcore, clinical depression another poster referred to. I think I may have, but I don't know as the only way I would know for sure is to have seen someone who would have evaluated me. At the very least, you would have to admit that some people are just stronger than others, but it's certainly true that life circumstances vary widely.
It's probably not possible to evaluate the depths of feeling of anyone via posts on an internet forum.
Well that sounds useful. I really have no idea if I've suffered from the hardcore, clinical depression another poster referred to. I think I may have, but I don't know as the only way I would know for sure is to have seen someone who would have evaluated me. At the very least, you would have to admit that some people are just stronger than others, but it's certainly true that life circumstances vary widely.
It's probably not possible to evaluate the depths of feeling of anyone via posts on an internet forum.
Coming right after admitting you did not seek professional help when you may have been clinically depressed, the bolded statement almost sounds like victim shaming. Words matter. If you mentioned this to someone you truly care, it could affect them negatively for years and they may never tell you. Depressed people are as strong as anyone else.
Coming right after admitting you did not seek professional help when you may have been clinically depressed, the bolded statement almost sounds like victim shaming. Words matter. If you mentioned this to someone you truly care, it could affect them negatively for years and they may never tell you. Depressed people are as strong as anyone else.
I couldn’t rep you again so I just wanted to say I agree.
I couldn’t rep you again so I just wanted to say I agree.
Thank you, Spuggy. I hope the OP takes my comments as constructive criticism. I'm not purposefully trying to come down on her. Just trying to share my POV and
There have been little bouts of happiness in my life but never any prolonged periods that I would be able to distinguish from the unhappy periods. I can't isolate a particular prolonged period of happiness and say "that's what made me happy." That's why I'm always left with puzzled when someone tells me I need a hobby. A hobby has never made me happy before, why would it work now? I like to read. That's probably when I'm closest to what someone might call happiness.
So many people post in this forum who seem to be so unhappy; personal problems of all kinds, problems with family, problems with love. But it seems to me sometimes that the person is just, really, bored. They are not doing anything that makes them hapoy, they're just ruminating over the behavior of this or that person. And it's pointless because you can't change people. And you shouldn't put your life on hold, waiting for them to change.
I am not qualified to evaluate anyone but I wonder if often it would help to set the ruminating aside for a moment and figure out what would really bring joy into their life. It could be anything: rollerskating, bicycling, cooking, playing music, whatever made them happy as a child. I firmly believe that everyone has gifts. You have to find what makes you happy and pursue it. And tell people, if they're not going to be sweet to you, they can't be in your life.
I'm not qualified to evaluate anyone, but my hunch is that people who put others down, have some feelings of inadequacy, and do so in order to try and build themselves up in their own minds, which of course, is also potentially treatable with a good counselor. Or a good hobby, so they aren't so bored, and wasting precious time ruminating on the supposed faults of others.
A great big reason for clinical depression is chemical imbalance in the brain and has nothing to do with environment but rather whatever the brain decides to do with the chemicals at any given time. So that means depression cannot be predicted or predestined. It is a very serious disease and can be deadly.
It takes more than throwing medication at it to treat. So yes it can be treated but there is no guarantee.
We look for easy solutions to major life problems. I'm not saying don't do things you like to do, but if you've got a serious medical condition such as depression, fishing or rolling skating alone is not going to cure the issue. For those lucky folks who have never felt true depression, first, I'm very glad for you. But you can't really understand what a depressed person feels inside. And telling them to "find a hobby" is not helping in the long run.
That's not even to mention that I had (have) hobbies that I love, but when I'm at my mot depressed, the depression robs me of all positive feelings to the point where I start disliking my hobby.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kitty61
A great big reason for clinical depression is chemical imbalance in the brain and has nothing to do with environment but rather whatever the brain decides to do with the chemicals at any given time. So that means depression cannot be predicted or predestined. It is a very serious disease and can be deadly. It takes more than throwing medication at it to treat. So yes it can be treated but there is no guarantee.
Thanks to both of you for these points.
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