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Old 11-03-2018, 05:39 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,960 posts, read 17,342,198 times
Reputation: 30258

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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuirkyLibrary View Post
I am 27 and never had a girlfriend or any sort of relationship with a woman so this is pretty much a non-issue.

However, even if a woman openly stated her interest in me, I would never be able to believe it. A part of me would always remind me that it couldn't possibly be true.

Is this weird in some way?

Not weird. A lot of guys struggle with their self-esteem. How are you addressing it, OP?
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Old 11-03-2018, 05:54 PM
 
Location: The Ozone Layer, apparently...
4,004 posts, read 2,082,729 times
Reputation: 7714
Quote:
Originally Posted by redplum33 View Post
I don't understand your comments in relation to my post.
Im sorry, I wasn't more thorough, but I thought it was obvious when you agreed that this should be in the Psychology Forum. What are they going to do for him in the Psychology forum other than suggest therapy, and cant be done here?
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Old 11-03-2018, 05:57 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,927 posts, read 59,944,601 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ComeCloser View Post
Im sorry, I wasn't more thorough, but I thought it was obvious when you agreed that this should be in the Psychology Forum. What are they going to do for him in the Psychology forum other than suggest therapy, and cant be done here?
He didn't ask for help or for anyone to do anything for him. He used the context of a relationship to broach what is a psychological topic. He asked if it was weird, which is an evaluation of the psychological aspect of it; he didn't ask how to change it.
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Old 11-03-2018, 05:59 PM
 
1,713 posts, read 1,107,437 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuirkyLibrary View Post
However, even if a woman openly stated her interest in me, I would never be able to believe it.
I might believe it if she twisted my arm, but I would get as far away as possible and make sure nothing happened between us.
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Old 11-03-2018, 06:51 PM
 
Location: The Ozone Layer, apparently...
4,004 posts, read 2,082,729 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
He didn't ask for help or for anyone to do anything for him. He used the context of a relationship to broach what is a psychological topic. He asked if it was weird, which is an evaluation of the psychological aspect of it; he didn't ask how to change it.
People, especially young people, describe things as weird and creepy all the time in this forum. I assumed is it weird to be another way of asking, does anyone else ever feel this way? You make a valid point that he did not ask how to change it, which could be interpreted as he was not asking for therapy.
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Old 11-03-2018, 07:18 PM
 
Location: Canada
11,795 posts, read 12,033,106 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuirkyLibrary View Post
I am 27 and never had a girlfriend or any sort of relationship with a woman so this is pretty much a non-issue.

However, even if a woman openly stated her interest in me, I would never be able to believe it. A part of me would always remind me that it couldn't possibly be true.

Is this weird in some way?
What in your life has led you to this point?
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Old 11-03-2018, 07:49 PM
 
Location: The Ozone Layer, apparently...
4,004 posts, read 2,082,729 times
Reputation: 7714
And, welcome to the Psyche forum. If you want relationship advice, reword your thread and try again in relationships.
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Old 11-03-2018, 08:13 PM
 
Location: planet earth
8,620 posts, read 5,652,717 times
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OP: It's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Have you heard of Law of Attraction?

It might be of interest to you if you want anything good in life.
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Old 11-03-2018, 09:59 PM
 
1,713 posts, read 1,107,437 times
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I believe OP is basing his thoughts on the best criteria we all have, lived experience.

If after 27 years of little interest and, I presume, no deep involvement with the preferred gender, someone pitched up out of nowhere and made themselves available, wouldn't you be a little dubious?

I'm in the same boat after 42 years and do all I can to prevent anyone taking a shine to me. Can't deal, won't deal.
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Old 11-03-2018, 10:10 PM
 
Location: Sector 001
15,946 posts, read 12,287,130 times
Reputation: 16109
I know how you feel, OP.

If it makes you feel better, on average 33% of men passed on their seed through most of our evolutionary history. It's only the past 2000 years or so that one man, one woman relationships became more normal. You can thank religion for that. Before that, it was survival of the fittest... a small number of men got most of the women, where as the majority of men, say 50-75%, got none. There was a time in our history when most men were slaves, and the number was way skewed. This is the reason women generally speaking are attracted to dominance... because we are animals and if you look at virtually any other species, the fight for dominance is apparent and very much wired into everyone's DNA. Generally speaking, women aren't going to want a passive or boring man (such as myself) and I've come to accept that. I'm working on changing.. getting better and not bitter, which is what all men should be doing.

https://psmag.com/environment/17-to-...uctive-success


Feel comfort in knowing that 2000 years ago during the time or Rome, there were men complaining that they couldn't either understand, or couldn't get a women because of either the genetic lottery or their deficient personalities or simply being given bad advice about what they want. That part has not changed for a VERY long time. As I dig more into evolution I see that nature is not pure and innocent, but rather quite harsh and cruel. All that really matters is what causes the DNA to propagate from one generation to another.. whatever it takes. The world is not going to hell.. it's going on exactly how it has been since the first amino acids formed several billion years ago.

Last edited by sholomar; 11-03-2018 at 10:34 PM..
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