Women: What is your perspective? (misogynistic, girlfriend, chauvinism, father)
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I grew up in Chicago and worked downtown for most of my career and sadly one learns quickly who, what and where to avoid as many possibilities (as is possible) for random acts of unsolicited and/or lewd conduct from the male species (obviously not all males).
Reading through this thread made me think back to my childhood, teen years, that of a young woman and now senior citizen. These cautions which have been passed down to women from their mothers and their mothers and their mothers for eons, I suspect, as I passed them down to my daughters. I suppose it is a rite of passage among the female gender.
I learned on my own, as both of my parents had moved to the city from the Ozarks. Neither of them had any street smarts. I learned early to pay attention to the people round me. I have an older sister, 12 yrs older than me....she didn't teach me anything, as she preferred to bully me and terrorize me.
It’s so nice for you guys to stop by a thread asking for answers from women to tell us that 1) “not all men are perpetrators “ (duh and no one said they are) and 2) women cause their own threats by anticipating them.
The BS just never ends.
When I read the article again it was just like reading a suspense novel like Stephen King.
My point went way over your head. My point was not to say men were more or less at risk than women nor to say that women were more or less likely to be the criminals. My point is that EVERYONE, both men and women, are a target of both men and women and so they should all be aware of their surroundings and situations. Just because a man is less likely a target doesn’t mean he isn’t a target. I may be a guy but I’m a short 5 feet 5 inch tall guy approaching 50 years old with a shoulder injury from the Navy among other injuries. I keep pepper spray with me in my car for certain situations. Even in my younger and healthier years we in the Navy were taught to be wary of our surroundings when out on liberty because our status of being Us Navy sailors automatically made us targets and if we went off alone our risk greatly increased. Some guys were targeted by thieves, by agents looking to gather information, and some who hated Americans and wanted to attack and or kill an American just for the fun of it. I have had my wallet stollen, have been scammed out of my money by a woman, and was nearly attacked (managed to escape).
Start your own thread. The topic of this thread is about a mindset, not crime statistics.
My point went way over your head. My point was not to say men were more or less at risk than women nor to say that women were more or less likely to be the criminals. My point is that EVERYONE, both men and women, are a target of both men and women and so they should all be aware of their surroundings and situations. Just because a man is less likely a target doesn’t mean he isn’t a target. I may be a guy but I’m a short 5 feet 5 inch tall guy approaching 50 years old with a shoulder injury from the Navy among other injuries. I keep pepper spray with me in my car for certain situations. Even in my younger and healthier years we in the Navy were taught to be wary of our surroundings when out on liberty because our status of being Us Navy sailors automatically made us targets and if we went off alone our risk greatly increased. Some guys were targeted by thieves, by agents looking to gather information, and some who hated Americans and wanted to attack and or kill an American just for the fun of it. I have had my wallet stollen, have been scammed out of my money by a woman, and was nearly attacked (managed to escape).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tall Traveler
Okay here's some balance...78% of murder victims in the USA are male and worldwide, it's 79%. So men are roughly 4 times more likely to be murdered than women.
Now when it comes to sexual crimes victimization, I don't have the statistics but in my experience, it's gong to be overwhelmingly female victims...we (men) need to work to drastically reduce that (open to suggestions). I do think it's sad that women worldwide do have to be careful and wary in everything they do.
These are two important points made in the thread. As a man, I am more likely to be a victim of a violent crime than a woman. However, no one is making threads about how it feels to be a man and to be disproportionately affected by murder and other violent crimes. No one is ever asking me what I have to do to prevent myself from being murdered.
I've also felt that women have stolen money from me. But no one has asked me my opinion on how I have been a victim of women perpetrating theft against me.
I know of guys who have been divorced and had divorce judgments that involved alimony. How much attention is paid to those guys who have been financially raked under the coals? Who cares about their thoughts and feelings?
Yes, I realize that there have been injustices perpetrated against women by men. But there seems to be a pervasive attitude on C-D boards that men are bad and women are good. It's not just C-D boards. I sense that this occurs in greater Western culture too. Men are not automatically bad. Women are not automatically good. Women do lousy things to men. Men do lousy things to women. That was my point in bringing balance to the discussion.
These are two important points made in the thread. As a man, I am more likely to be a victim of a violent crime than a woman. However, no one is making threads about how it feels to be a man and to be disproportionately affected by murder and other violent crimes. No one is ever asking me what I have to do to prevent myself from being murdered.
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No one's stopping you from making such a thread, either. Have at it!
The urge to minimize this kind of issue is mere defensiveness on display.
Some men feel threatened and attacked, whether rightfully or not, when faced with stories from women about how they try to minimize actual threats in their own lives. So they try to reframe the problem in order to lessen the bad feelings they have, again rightfully or not, upon hearing these stories.
It would be so much better if, instead of succumbing to this condescending urge they just take a breath and acknowledge that SOME PEOPLE EXPERIENCE LIFE DIFFERENTLY.
The internet has allowed me to read a lot of anecdotes from women on how threatened/harassed/menaced men can make them. About how they need to tell their friends/family where they go, how they need to always have an escape plan, how they cross the street if they are alone and a man is walking towards them, etc.
Is this (planning around the possible threat of an aggressive male) a universal part of the female experience?
As a young man, it's really jarring to hear, as I rarely worry about my safety. Is there a change you would like to see in men, in general?
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