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Old Yesterday, 03:21 PM
 
Location: So Cal
39,064 posts, read 38,513,226 times
Reputation: 40068

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I've heard it referred to that way.

I had a coworker who used to say it was the coward's way out, because instead of dealing with your problems you leave them PLUS the tragedy of your death for your loved ones to handle.
I've heard similar stories like this. I'm kinda torn on this issue.

I'm not as harsh about it but there is an element of selfishness but I also get that people in that state of mind aren't rational players really. IDK.

I'm kind of vacillating a bit on this one.

Knew a kid back in HS that killed himself with a gun. I couldn't imagine the horror that the parents went through upon finding that.

I literally couldn't imagine it.
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Old Yesterday, 03:35 PM
 
14,951 posts, read 19,100,146 times
Reputation: 11972
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I had a coworker who used to say it was the coward's way out, because instead of dealing with your problems you leave them PLUS the tragedy of your death for your loved ones to handle.
The word for that is "selfish"
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Old Yesterday, 03:38 PM
 
2,483 posts, read 3,114,809 times
Reputation: 4848
I really don't care either way whether they are cowards or not or if the professor stated they are cowards. The only thing I have to add is that almost everyone I have known with a psychology degree is a bit of a nut job and typically have some of the most screwed up kids. With that said, I really don't think psychologists should be judging anyone else. lol
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Old Yesterday, 04:03 PM
 
Location: Riding a rock floating through space
954 posts, read 254,535 times
Reputation: 2485
Quote:
Originally Posted by dijkstra View Post
I really don't care either way whether they are cowards or not or if the professor stated they are cowards. The only thing I have to add is that almost everyone I have known with a psychology degree is a bit of a nut job and typically have some of the most screwed up kids. With that said, I really don't think psychologists should be judging anyone else. lol
I too have found that often those who go into this profession do so to figure out why they themselves are so f'd up.
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Old Yesterday, 04:16 PM
 
13,170 posts, read 12,774,250 times
Reputation: 37996
Frankly, it's terrifying that a mental health professional said this. People who are suicidal are generally suffering greatly and do not see an end to that suffering. It is a horrible situation to be in. I was at the point where I had planned my own suicide (rather rationally and methodically) so that I had a course of action if what was wrong could not be fixed. Then I set about trying to fix the way I felt - I was successful, but it was a very scary time while I was trying to right myself.

The fact that a presumable PhD demonstrated this level of ignorance and lack of empathy is alarming. I would make a complaint to the department head, frankly.
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Old Yesterday, 04:36 PM
 
Location: Norfolk
1,770 posts, read 2,064,727 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by homenj View Post
Am I the only one who is dumbfounded by this?

Speaking as the wife of a man who put a Glock in his mouth, I'd say your professor is exactly right. Thing is, there are many different reasons as to why people end their own lives.

But in some cases, hell yes. My husband's was a "revenge suicide." They're rare (about 10% of suicides) but they're the worst. He left behind a note blaming me.

I'm in the process now - three years later - of trying to sort through his sh*t one more time and get it out of my life. Must be nice to just sit in a chair and blow out your brains and let your wife clean up your mess, literally and figuratively.

So yes, I'd say - in my husband's case - he was a mean-spirited, self-absorbed coward. And I bet that your professor had a relative who was like my husband.
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Old Yesterday, 04:42 PM
 
Location: Norfolk
1,770 posts, read 2,064,727 times
Reputation: 5778
This is the very best description I've ever seen of the damage inflicted by suicide.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPkDFO7WTW4

James Spader describes seeing a suicide bomber and the damage that it inflicts, and explains, as an allegory, how that relates to committing suicide:

"There was almost nothing left of the people closest to him. The closer they were to the bomber, the more horrible the effect. That's EVERY suicide. Every single one. An act of terror perpetrated against everyone who has ever known them, or ever loved them. The people closest to you, the ones that cherished you, are are ones that suffer the most damage and the most pain."
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Old Yesterday, 05:27 PM
 
Location: Ft. Myers
16,583 posts, read 10,180,006 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by homenj View Post
Am I the only one who is dumbfounded by this?

You probably are the only one. Suicide is not only a cowardly act, but a very selfish act. The person doesn't think at all what his/her act will do to all the people they leave behind.
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Old Yesterday, 05:37 PM
 
Location: Central IL
13,978 posts, read 7,565,413 times
Reputation: 32534
Frankly I'm surprised that there is little recognition that psychology is a scientific discipline - and that applies not only to the clinical aspects but also to social, development, cognitive, perceptual, etc. sub-disciplines.

This is not a class to be taught from opinions or personal ideas - the instructor is there to discuss the SCIENCE behind every single topic on the syllabus. I frankly don't care what his opinion is on anything - if I'm paying tuition then I want to understand the research behind everything.

I don't sit in a psychology class to get all touchy feely - well, maybe if it's a psych of adjustment course. Besides being very callous in his stated opinion he apparently didn't back it up with anything. If that's how he teaches the rest of his class I'd want my money back.

Is suicide cowardly? Selfish? Selfless? A relief to many, including some of those left behind? Irrational? Rational? There are many perspectives - a student should be exposed to all of them...
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Old Yesterday, 09:17 PM
 
36 posts, read 2,105 times
Reputation: 36
Quote:
Originally Posted by homenj View Post
Am I the only one who is dumbfounded by this?

Maybe the professor was needing to prevent their own suicide by saying that.
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