Why are there people with a pet (dog or cat) & yet you NEVER see them showing any affection or love to their animal? (woman, parent)
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Why are there people having a dog (or cat) as a pet and yet you can see them day after day after day after week after month after year after multiple years at a time with their pet & you seemingly NEVER see them showing any degree of demonstrative affection or love to their animals? Why take it upon yourself to have an animal AT ALL (with the time, expense, and commitments it demands of you to tend to the needs of such a pet) and yet, to anyone's observations over the course of time, you seemingly never hug, kiss, stroke, rub, cuddle, and otherwise show other acts of apparent love for your possessed pet? It seems as though some (or many?) of them are even seemingly annoyed or nonplussed to have to tend to this animal. Then why have one AT ALL if it so non-plusses you? I've encountered this phenomenon varied times over the course of six-something decades of living to-date (thus far).
A most strange phenomenon!
How about you? How you noticed this over the course of time with some of your fellow humans and wondered about it?
Some people don't even show love to another human being, let alone an animal. It's a personality thing or a cultural thing. Some people just feel uncomfortable showing affection, like it's a weakness, embarrassing, or they feel uncomfortable with physical intimacy. But they like having you around because they continue to see you. There are other ways to show a person you like them besides the warm and fuzzy stuff.
Cultural because some cultures aren't comfortable showing affection. Never an "I love you," hug, or kiss from their parents, yet of course they show you they love you in other ways. They get up to drive you somewhere at 6 AM, buy food for you, drive you to your friend's house, etc.
My rescue rat terrier loves everyone. The only downside to that, is that she insists on licking everyone's faces. And, if you stand up to discourage her, she will jump up and continue to try to kiss your face. If you bend down and say, "Oh it's alright," even after I warn you that she will try to kiss your face against your will, she will attack your face with her tongue. This will include her trying to stick her tongue down your throat.
Now, don't try to downplay my description of this, or my warning to people as to how she behaves. She will absolutely do her best to attack your face - only with the intent of kissing it - but she won't give up. And, that will include her doing her absolute, terrier-stubborn best - to stick her tongue into your mouth.
I rescued her and I don't have her around other people enough to go through extensive training as to this behavior. But, I'm telling you that people don't listen to me.
So, I don't take her around other people. When people come to visit in my apartment, I put her in her crate. I will sometimes let her out of the crate, after people beg me to, but then I have to hold onto her leash and not let her attack people's faces. They, inevitably, say it's fine, but, it's not really fine. They think I'm being restrictive by holding onto the collar. But, if she gets the best of me and actually does get to their faces and licks them and sticks her tongue down their throat, they then say, "Whoa, okay, that was intense..." as if they hadn't had a warning and my dog was out of control, etc.
Just saying, there is a reason my dog isn't allowed around anyone else but me, at least in any way where she can misbehave.
When nobody else is around, which is most of the time, she is curled up next to me, or really happy to be with me at our secret park where she can chase squirrels off-leash, etc. She's the sweetest, smartest dog I've ever co-habitated with, and she even sleeps in my bed with me. But, I do my best to keep her away from other people, because she doesn't understand that the rules between her and me, also apply to everyone else. She thinks that every individual needs to set individual boundaries, apparently.
So, you might want to think twice about how people treat their animals. There might be a reason you never thought of.
I've run in to a very few people who seemed unconcerned about an animal they owned, but they were few and far between. A few were people who raised livestock for income or consumption. Their animals were treated humanely, but there wasn't a personal relationship with them.
While working for a local animal control agency I did meet people who seemed to care nothing for the pets they had, but they were generally scummy inconsiderate cretins in other aspects of their lives as well. Sort of expected it, as they didn't seem to care about anyone or anything other than themselves. Who knows why they ever ended up with a pet.
I met a older woman on an airline flight that had been delayed, delayed, canceled, and re-booked over a couple of days. She had a small dog in an underseat carrier. Nasty little thing that snarled and lunged at everyone who got near it. Obviously stressed out and unhappy. Never once during all the hours I spent sitting near her in various airport waiting areas by during those two days did I see that woman do anything to comfort the dog or even speak to it. I happened to see her walking it outdoors once and even then she acted as if there was a stick of wood on the end of the leash. Not a kind word. It really was bizarre.
There is a training company that uses electric shock to teach the dogs EVERYTHING. A lot of the dogs end up in rescue apparently for "aggression" issues according to people I know heading those groups. Training in that method completely destroys the bonds between owner and dog, from what I've observed.
At events, these people have their dogs put away in crates all the time except when they are walking them. The rest of us have our dogs out and are either training them or playing with them. Anything to build that bond. But these shock collar trainers have no concept of reward and play. Their dogs, as a result, are largely disconnected from them. Even the friendly ones, don't really have much desire to interact with their owners in particular, not any more than they do with random strangers.
There is something deeply dysfunctional about people who believe that is a good way to go about things.
I suppose the true story behind each person's demeanor and displayed (or non-displayed) behavior with or toward their possessed animal(s) will cover a whole spectrum of explanations.
It's just that one is not forced to have a pet (unless there is something I don't know about any particular person's life circumstances). If having to be responsible for such a living being is such a seeming displeasure to oneself, why did said person choose to take on this responsibility in the first place??? I myself love love love love love dogs (for instance) and can show them endless affection, love, and care and yet, in my entire life, I've never chosen to have a dog (nor cat) as a pet. For I can't be tied down to always being there day-after-day throughout my life to continually be there to tend to the needs of a pet and to then take on a not-really-necessary-nor-essential life expense . . . and I don't want such a pet to be creating undue noise for neighbors when I'm can't be there to tend to it and keep it company. So it's not for lack of love or affinity for them, for I have endless love and affinity for them and will unreservedly show it.
I truly don't sit around being preoccupied by this issue throughout the course of life; it's just a passing thought that has sometimes crossed my mind over the years of life. I just wonder: For all those observed over enough of a course of time throughout the decades of life who never display or exemplify any apparent affection or joy at having to care for a dog, I've wondered: "Then why do you choose to have one at all in the first place? What unquenchable need(s) does it fulfill for you? I seem to care that much more about your animal than you do."
Perplexing but, in the end, not an important issue to be preoccupied with in life-at-large. Just a mere intellectual curiosity on my part.
I have neighbors who leave their dogs outside, night and day. They never seem to interact with them unless it is to feed them. I often wonder, why even have them? To me, there is nothing more sad than a dog house in the far corner of the yard, far from the home. For a pack animal, it must be torture to see people coming and going and be so far removed from any interaction.
Too many times, posters here on CD will suggest getting a dog or cat to take care of security or a mouse/rat infestation. I can only hope that those who take their advice also realize that the animal needs love, affection and human interaction and are willing to give it.
Why are there people having a dog (or cat) as a pet and yet you can see them day after day after day after week after month after year after multiple years at a time with their pet & you seemingly NEVER see them showing any degree of demonstrative affection or love to their animals? Why take it upon yourself to have an animal AT ALL (with the time, expense, and commitments it demands of you to tend to the needs of such a pet) and yet, to anyone's observations over the course of time, you seemingly never hug, kiss, stroke, rub, cuddle, and otherwise show other acts of apparent love for your possessed pet? It seems as though some (or many?) of them are even seemingly annoyed or nonplussed to have to tend to this animal. Then why have one AT ALL if it so non-plusses you? I've encountered this phenomenon varied times over the course of six-something decades of living to-date (thus far).
A most strange phenomenon!
How about you? How you noticed this over the course of time with some of your fellow humans and wondered about it?
If it's true...I have seen it rarely, then these are the types that do not deserve to have pets. Most crave our attention, even cats,
so to withhold that is heartbreaking...
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