U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-10-2019, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
22,099 posts, read 14,519,093 times
Reputation: 31197

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl View Post
Well, heck, we even see the double standard here on CD. Men will post angry threads over something pretty trivial. But women who post to express disagreement -- in a much more neutral tone than how male posters comment -- will be accused of being "angry" or "triggered" and in need of "meds." How often do we see male posters saying similar things to other male posters?
Such posts to women are ways to trivialize our concerns and view, without having to consider them valid. This is done all the time.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-10-2019, 02:03 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
22,099 posts, read 14,519,093 times
Reputation: 31197
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pogue Mahone View Post
Calm down ladies. The last thing our society needs right now is more anger.
This statement is exactly what the female posters on this thread have been pointing out as dismissive.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-10-2019, 05:33 PM
 
6,376 posts, read 3,616,897 times
Reputation: 22302
The thing is, Pogue can have his opinion and it doesn't affect the validity of anyone else's opinion one bit. Unless you're counting him as the authority and everyone else as less than.

No need to feel dismissed unless Pogue's the boss.

I wonder how much this affects women's anger unconsciously because we've been subtly influenced since childhood to perceive men as the authority and the real struggle is with learning to affirm ourselves.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-10-2019, 06:25 PM
 
Location: Ro cha cha, NY
3,085 posts, read 4,225,892 times
Reputation: 5406
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
Experiencing anger and being bitter aren't the same thing, though.
You're absolutely right. I certainly wasn't trying to minimize those who were talking about real issues. It was mainly directed to one poster who was just hating on men. There is a huge difference. She was basically just gender bashing which isn't allowed. Most of you were talking about real issues. And everyone feels rage from time to time. I know I do.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-10-2019, 08:34 PM
 
Location: Colorado (PA at heart)
8,945 posts, read 13,722,653 times
Reputation: 11645
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lodestar View Post
The thing is, Pogue can have his opinion and it doesn't affect the validity of anyone else's opinion one bit. Unless you're counting him as the authority and everyone else as less than.

No need to feel dismissed unless Pogue's the boss.

I wonder how much this affects women's anger unconsciously because we've been subtly influenced since childhood to perceive men as the authority and the real struggle is with learning to affirm ourselves.
There is a reason to feel dismissed if Pogue's opinion is representative of a large portion/majority of society. That's the whole point of the topic/article.

But there is a chance Pogue was just making a sarcastic joke - hard to tell over the internet.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-10-2019, 08:41 PM
 
6,376 posts, read 3,616,897 times
Reputation: 22302
Quote:
Originally Posted by PA2UK View Post
There is a reason to feel dismissed if Pogue's opinion is representative of a large portion/majority of society. That's the whole point of the topic/article.

But there is a chance Pogue was just making a sarcastic joke - hard to tell over the internet.
I was following Eleanor Roosevelt's very good world view - "Nobody can make me feel inferior without my permission."
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2019, 07:35 AM
Status: "You are only coming through in waves." (set 12 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
8,178 posts, read 3,204,765 times
Reputation: 14724
Quote:
Originally Posted by silibran View Post
This statement is exactly what the female posters on this thread have been pointing out as dismissive.
I've yet to see anyone make a convincing argument that what our society needs right now is more anger.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2019, 07:59 AM
Status: "You are only coming through in waves." (set 12 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
8,178 posts, read 3,204,765 times
Reputation: 14724
Quote:
Originally Posted by PA2UK View Post
There is a reason to feel dismissed if Pogue's opinion is representative of a large portion/majority of society. That's the whole point of the topic/article.

But there is a chance Pogue was just making a sarcastic joke - hard to tell over the internet.
I get in trouble for that a lot.

(was Pogue, name changed)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2019, 08:28 AM
 
6,376 posts, read 3,616,897 times
Reputation: 22302
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fifty Seven View Post
I've yet to see anyone make a convincing argument that what our society needs right now is more anger.
I don't think anyone is arguing that we need that. Having a feeling and acting upon that feeling are two very different things.

If I'm understanding correctly people are talking about having generalized rage about how they perceive themselves and women in general being treated in society. They are talking about a sense that they get that that feeling isn't well received by society and that it makes them feel even more anger.

I think that's a valid concern. Our psychological wellness is affected by cultural issues.

I think every woman has to find her way through this maze of contradictions on her own but it helps to know that it is okay to feel the way she does. I assume for myself that the goal is to release the anger because for me it isn't physically or psychologically healthy to carry anger for very long.

I benefitted from a book called "Women and Madness" by Phillis Chessler among others. It really validate the "crazy angry lady" attitude in society. One I won't name because although she was a great help to me she turned out to be a truly nasty angry woman under her veneer of okayness. She still helped. The Great Oz before I peeked behind the curtain and found my goddess had feet of clay. LOL

And the best help of all was a group of angry women struggling with the same issue. They "let" me be angry until I didn't need to be anymore.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2019, 08:35 AM
Status: "You are only coming through in waves." (set 12 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
8,178 posts, read 3,204,765 times
Reputation: 14724
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lodestar View Post
I don't think anyone is arguing that we need that. Having a feeling and acting upon that feeling are two very different things.

If I'm understanding correctly people are talking about having generalized rage about how they perceive themselves and women in general being treated in society. They are talking about a sense that they get that that feeling isn't well received by society and that it makes them feel even more anger.

I think that's a valid concern. Our psychological wellness is affected by cultural issues.

I think every woman has to find her way through this maze of contradictions on her own but it helps to know that it is okay to feel the way she does. I assume for myself that the goal is to release the anger because for me it isn't physically or psychologically healthy to carry anger for very long.

I benefitted from a book called "Women and Madness" by Phillis Chessler among others. It really validate the "crazy angry lady" attitude in society. One I won't name because although she was a great help to me she turned out to be a truly nasty angry woman under her veneer of okayness. She still helped. The Great Oz before I peeked behind the curtain and found my goddess had feet of clay. LOL

And the best help of all was a group of angry women struggling with the same issue. They "let" me be angry until I didn't need to be anymore.
Nobody can let you be angry but I'm glad group therapy helped you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top