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Old 06-30-2019, 08:01 PM
 
23 posts, read 6,111 times
Reputation: 25

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Are you at a gay gym??? lol

I have never once heard of this happening. Ever.



No, this is not some gay gym. I hope not but they approach me and try to stare me down
Dont bull**** me either, i know this is just some macho stuff going on
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Old 06-30-2019, 08:03 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,142 posts, read 41,752,473 times
Reputation: 82836
Quote:
Originally Posted by ConfusedGuy777 View Post
No, this is not some gay gym. I hope not but they approach me and try to stare me down
Dont bull**** me either, i know this is just some macho stuff going on
So there's NO CHANCE you're misreading what is going on, knowing that you are not great at body language.

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Old 06-30-2019, 08:05 PM
 
23 posts, read 6,111 times
Reputation: 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
So there's NO CHANCE you're misreading what is going on, knowing that you are not great at body language.




I dont know to be completely honest, i notice this happens more and more

When i leave the gym there was a guy standing by the door and he blocked my way on my way out and bumped into me and tried to look in my eyes


This is intimidation and men trying to be men and out alpha each other
You may not understand but some men on here may understand what I am saying and what happens with me on a daily basis
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Old 06-30-2019, 08:08 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,142 posts, read 41,752,473 times
Reputation: 82836
Quote:
Originally Posted by ConfusedGuy777 View Post

I dont know to be completely honest, i notice this happens more and more
And you aren't staring at them during your workout or while you're walking around the gym?
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Old 06-30-2019, 08:10 PM
 
23 posts, read 6,111 times
Reputation: 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
And you aren't staring at them during your workout or while you're walking around the gym?



ok ,why not everyone looks at each other in the gym unless they're in the zone and i cant be in the zone for two hours in the gym
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Old 06-30-2019, 08:14 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,142 posts, read 41,752,473 times
Reputation: 82836
Quote:
Originally Posted by ConfusedGuy777 View Post
ok ,why not everyone looks at each other in the gym unless they're in the zone and i cant be in the zone for two hours in the gym
But you don't like it when they look at YOU. So why should you look at them???

Stop doing it. You're apparently coming across as aggressive, which is why they're responding to you that way.

Go there to work out, not to engage in some faux primitive male dominance ritual. You KNOW eye contact is a problem for you, so knock it off.

Avert your eyes and focus on your workout.
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Old 06-30-2019, 10:03 PM
 
7,366 posts, read 2,917,987 times
Reputation: 12250
They may have caught you staring at the women. One of the women may have told them you’re giving her the creeps. That could be a way of challenging you, if you’re bothering someone. There’s no way for us to know, we’re not there, every action/reaction isn’t universal.

Avoid eye contact since you confessed to not knowing what is an appropriate amount? Maybe try online dating, there’s no staring involved.
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Old 07-01-2019, 07:36 AM
 
Location: South Africa
42 posts, read 9,856 times
Reputation: 80
[quote=ConfusedGuy777;55555490]I have serious "social" issues and I'm someone in society that people usually don't like. Yes i am a loner and was a social outcast all my life but I am a good engineer in my field

First and foremost stop saying such things about yourself!

You struggling because it seems to me you bring yourself down a lot, somewhere out there there's millions of people just like you and girls who would find your characteristics as cute or loveable who knows, every person likes their teas in different ways. By saying you suck and nobody likes you, you'll just attract more of that. Be kinder to yourself, someone out there will like you
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Old 07-01-2019, 09:54 AM
 
3,989 posts, read 2,601,043 times
Reputation: 8635
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
But you don't like it when they look at YOU. So why should you look at them???

Stop doing it. You're apparently coming across as aggressive, which is why they're responding to you that way.

Go there to work out, not to engage in some faux primitive male dominance ritual. You KNOW eye contact is a problem for you, so knock it off.

Avert your eyes and focus on your workout.
Agree. I'd stop with the eye contact OP. It's coming across as aggressive and that's why you're getting the responses you are. I wouldn't do it with women either because I'm gong to guess it's coming across as creepy. If you do happen to accidentally make eye contact with someone then make it very brief (one second) and look away. Don't continue to do it and don't worry about who looks away first.
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Old 07-01-2019, 09:59 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,533 posts, read 24,120,629 times
Reputation: 48896
Quote:
Originally Posted by ConfusedGuy777 View Post
Do you know what autism is? I may have social issues and I'm a tech genius/nerd however I have social issues and can't form relationships with other people
Yes i know, maybe society hates people like me and I'm an introvert but I'm asking for help here
Does your employer or community offer any assistance, like an EAP, that you could use to work with a counselor or therapist on your social issues?
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