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Old 07-02-2019, 06:59 PM
 
1,420 posts, read 798,689 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
They grow up with a screen in front of their face now I think itís pretty much impossible to hide the world from them. I think itís a shame though. Childhood is supposed to be carefree, kids dont have enough knowledge to process what they see and here. They donít need to spend childhood worrying about the future.

the screen isn't the world, nor is it a faithful reproduction of it. The screen is a world of its own and arguably not a very good or healthy one.
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Old 07-02-2019, 07:11 PM
 
Location: Central IL
15,216 posts, read 8,518,332 times
Reputation: 35608
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luciano700 View Post
Well, should they


I mean in this day and age of memes and political polarization, I really don't know if sheltering children from the madness of our world really serves a point anymore.


Think about it, when children are over sheltered and over protected they will get an incredibly dysfunctional shock. This dysfunctional shock kills the versatility to adapt to various enviroments or focus on more dark topics(in my opinion anyways )

But what do you guys think? Should children still not be taught the rawness of society at all in this day and age? Or no, avoid hiding the world from them as much as possible?
Naaahhh...throw 'em in cages like they do at the border - that'll toughen 'em up!

But seriously, something in the middle is preferable. Kids need to be prepared for life but in an age-appropriate manner. "Sheltering" never served a purpose other than keeping kids dependent on parents - at some point they had to leave the nest and were utterly unprepared for reality.
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Old 07-02-2019, 07:28 PM
 
Location: Round Rock, TX
2,639 posts, read 796,934 times
Reputation: 739
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
And you think they need to be exposed to the harsher realities of life? And if that IS what you think, can you give examples of what you think they need to know at that age?
Not all at once

Examples of controversial topics can include plenty lol


War, religion, politics, social issues, economics and so forth


But you can do it step by step basically.
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Old 07-02-2019, 07:41 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,617 posts, read 70,508,089 times
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Your question is pretty broad, OP. Small children need to be sheltered, so that they feel safe and secure. Experiencing the rough side of the world at too early an age can be traumatic. I think it's common to deal with the usual ups and downs that happen at school, bullies or cliquish friends, or whatever, as these issues come up. In this way, kids are exposed to an amount of adversity in an amount they can handle. Parents are there to explain, guide and support.

So, I don't know what you have in mind, when you ask if kids should be sheltered or not sheltered. Should kids be sheltered all the way through their teens, as in helicopter parenting? Of course not. Should they be exposed to cruelty at age 3 or 4? Ideally not. The trick is in striking a balance, and also building a bond with your kids, so they know they can come to you, when stuff arises.
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Old 07-02-2019, 09:04 PM
 
20,549 posts, read 16,619,414 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deserterer View Post
the screen isn't the world, nor is it a faithful reproduction of it. The screen is a world of its own and arguably not a very good or healthy one.
My point was they see everything that is happening in the world in real time. It’s very difficult to hide the realities of the world from a child who has access to the Internet.I think they actually know too much too young today. A kid should not be worried about North Korea, or flesh eating bacteria or school shootings. Rather than sheltered, kids today have to hide under desks in the dark for 20 minutes during “Lock down” or “Active Shooter” drills. I used to work in an elementary school, and was in preschool class during a lockdown drill. You have to huddle the kids under a table, turn out all the lights and they can’t make a sound for about 20 minutes. We even had autistic kids in the class that we had to keep quiet. It’s scary for all of them.

Rather than sheltered, I think kids have too much to worry about it too young in age today. Rates of depression, mental illness and suicide among children and teens has skyrocketed n recent years and I think knowing too much about the world too soon is one reason.

Last edited by ocnjgirl; 07-02-2019 at 09:15 PM..
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Old 07-03-2019, 12:23 AM
 
Location: Eugene, Oregon
9,143 posts, read 3,000,345 times
Reputation: 13786
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I have a niece who is 16 and has been homeschooled her entire life, with no access to the internet. The only TV she was allowed to watch was reruns of vintage comedy shows like Gilligan's Island on DVD.

She is sheltered to the point that it has handicapped her. You cannot carry on a typical conversation because she doesn't understand even the most basic of references. And this is only with her cousins, who are not exactly street thugs.

The thing is ... I can tell there is a part of her that knows she is missing something, and when she is finally allowed to question her upbringing, she will be in for quite a transition.

I think what I have always thought about this issue ... that part of raising children is to prepare them for the world in which they will live in ways that are age appropriate. I think they should have certain restrictions as they grow, but that they should be educated, busy, and informed. And they should be allowed to ask questions and speak their minds in ways that are productive, not destructive.

We need to work to raise kids who will have a positive effect on society, not kids who will hide from it.

In some places, public or private organizations still raise pheasants, hatched in incubators and brought up in cages. They have no exposure to the real world and no mother to give them basic survival training. Then they are turned out in hunting areas, to provide what is called, "sport" for those who come to shoot them. They have little wariness and are weak flyers. Those that somehow make it through this, usually starve or are taken by predators.

The young woman who is described in the quoted post, seems to be comparable in her real-world skills, to those hatchery birds.
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Old 07-03-2019, 06:52 AM
 
9,438 posts, read 5,246,863 times
Reputation: 3228
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luciano700 View Post
Well, should they


I mean in this day and age of memes and political polarization, I really don't know if sheltering children from the madness of our world really serves a point anymore.


Think about it, when children are over sheltered and over protected they will get an incredibly dysfunctional shock. This dysfunctional shock kills the versatility to adapt to various enviroments or focus on more dark topics(in my opinion anyways )

But what do you guys think? Should children still not be taught the rawness of society at all in this day and age? Or no, avoid hiding the world from them as much as possible?
I'm a Boomer who was a child during 1950's when the Cold War was going on and anxiety about nuclear war was omnipresent. I also remember when polio, prior to the Salk vaccine, was a big danger during summer months. Kids were not sheltered from the reality of those things. So what purpose would it serve to keep some important facts of living away from older children?
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Old 07-03-2019, 11:13 AM
 
20,108 posts, read 11,152,482 times
Reputation: 20147
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
My point was they see everything that is happening in the world in real time. It’s very difficult to hide the realities of the world from a child who has access to the Internet.I think they actually know too much too young today. A kid should not be worried about North Korea, or flesh eating bacteria or school shootings. Rather than sheltered, kids today have to hide under desks in the dark for 20 minutes during “Lock down” or “Active Shooter” drills. I used to work in an elementary school, and was in preschool class during a lockdown drill. You have to huddle the kids under a table, turn out all the lights and they can’t make a sound for about 20 minutes. We even had autistic kids in the class that we had to keep quiet. It’s scary for all of them.

Rather than sheltered, I think kids have too much to worry about it too young in age today. Rates of depression, mental illness and suicide among children and teens has skyrocketed n recent years and I think knowing too much about the world too soon is one reason.
I was a single parent when my son was small. When he was in kindergarten--about 1984--he suddenly developed an extreme fear of walking with me to the playground two blocks from our house.

It took me a bit of calm discussion to discover why this sudden terror had descended upon him.

I was an avid watcher of the then-new Cable News Network. I watched it every morning as I got ready for work and got him ready for daycare. I tended to watch it when we got home as I prepared dinner.

Now...when I was that small, television news was in black-and-white with two old guys sitting at a desk reading from sheets of paper. Nothing that caught my childish interest.

CNN came on with bright, boldly colored set designs, flashing intros, dramatic music, the commanding voice of James Earl Jones...Sesame Street for adults.

And also attractive to children. My son had been paying attention to the CNN reporters condensing all the dire calamities worldwide and shoving them out like military Meals Ready to Eat.

But my son had no understanding of how big the world was. The world he concretely understood was the two-block walk to the playground. As far as he could understand, all that calamity was occurring within those two blocks.
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Old 07-03-2019, 11:19 AM
 
20,549 posts, read 16,619,414 times
Reputation: 38581
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph_Kirk View Post
I was a single parent when my son was small. When he was in kindergarten--about 1984--he suddenly developed an extreme fear of walking with me to the playground two blocks from our house.

It took me a bit of calm discussion to discover why this sudden terror descended upon him.

I was an avid watcher of the then-new Cable News Network. I watched it every morning as I got ready for work and got him ready for daycare. I tended to watch it when we got home as I prepared dinner.

Now...when I was that small, television news was in black-and-white with two old guys sitting at a desk reading from sheets of paper. Nothing that caught my young interest.

CNN came on with bright, bold colors, dramatic music, the commanding voice of James Earl Jones--Sesame Street for adults.

And also attractive to children. My son had been paying attention to the CNN reporters condensing all the dire calamities worldwide and shoving them out like military Meals Ready to Eat.

But my son had no understanding of how big the world was. The world he concretely understood was the two-block walk to the playground. As far as he could understand, all that calamity was occurring within those two blocks.
Thatís the problem when kids learn about scary things, they donít have the knowledge or know how to process it. I remember eavesdropping on a conversation between my mother and my grandmother in the late 60s when I was still very young. My brother was seven years older than me, and I remember them talking about their fear that he would get drafted and have to go to Vietnam. My brother was my entire life because I had already lost my father by then. I spent years secretly terrified that I was going to lose my brother. I never told my mother that I heard the conversation. I kept it all internalized and just worried and worried that he was going to leave me and get killed. I still remember those feelings 50 years later.
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Old 07-03-2019, 12:44 PM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
9,207 posts, read 8,293,143 times
Reputation: 19949
Let them be kids while they can and believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy.

They will grow up soon enough.

Unless they are the Duggars. Because, fundies.
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