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Old 07-14-2019, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Ro cha cha, NY
3,085 posts, read 4,224,727 times
Reputation: 5406

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Quote:
Originally Posted by L8Gr8Apost8 View Post
The OP may very well be on the part of the spectrum where he does have a choice though. It was my experience that the addiction fired off warning shots as it progressed. My first blackout was at age 35 and I didn't have another one for years. Toward the end I was blacking out all the time. I also experienced once that feeling of not having a choice. Luckily I got out before I lost my right of refusal.


Well, I hope so. However, he himself has stated that he has lost control. Only the OP really knows where he is at with it. Either or, if he's not completely out of control now, that's where he will be later. It's not going to get any better. It's a progressive disease, and will only get worse. And if he can't control it now, he will never be able to control it. Abstinence (regardless of how he gets there) is the only solution.
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Old 07-14-2019, 02:31 PM
 
Location: minnesota
6,416 posts, read 2,152,651 times
Reputation: 2201
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
Well, I hope so. However, he himself has stated that he has lost control. Only the OP really knows where he is at with it. Either or, if he's not completely out of control now, that's where he will be later. It's not going to get better. And if he can't control it now, he will never be able to control it. Abstinence (regardless of how he gets there) is the only solution.
He'll have to answer if he loses control once he starts drinking or before. Personally, I didn't lose control until about the 4th drink.

I'm not in AA but 6.5 years ago I escaped the cycle. I agree that no amount of alcohol is a safe amount for me. It's too serious of a thing to play around with.
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Old 07-14-2019, 02:32 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,421 posts, read 32,316,243 times
Reputation: 19945
Forgetting what happened or p*ssing people off are sure signs of a problem. As far as most people though, what defines an alcoholic. Every definition is different depending on who you talk to. Some people drink daily. Some in moderation. Some binge on weekends. Until there is a real clear definition most won't even know.

I know people that drink every day off and at nights even if they have to work. Only one I know gets consistently fall down trunk and blacking out.
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Old 07-14-2019, 02:34 PM
 
Location: Ro cha cha, NY
3,085 posts, read 4,224,727 times
Reputation: 5406
Quote:
Originally Posted by L8Gr8Apost8 View Post
He'll have to answer if he loses control once he starts drinking or before. Personally, I didn't lose control until about the 4th drink.

I'm not in AA but 6.5 years ago I escaped the cycle. I agree that no amount of alcohol is a safe amount for me. It's too serious of a thing to play around with.


I appreciate the honesty. And with that, people will minimize what you have just said. I appreciate you (especially in a thread like this) telling your story, knowing this crap that you were going to get. People need to learn how to listen. Too many people have claimed that they have no control,yet it's all on deaf ears. That's freaking sad. As if anyone would make up the fact that they are powerless over alcohol. I mean, really, just shaking my damn head.....
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Old 07-14-2019, 02:36 PM
 
Location: minnesota
6,416 posts, read 2,152,651 times
Reputation: 2201
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1AngryTaxPayer View Post
Forgetting what happened or p*ssing people off are sure signs of a problem. As far as most people though, what defines an alcoholic. Every definition is different depending on who you talk to. Some people drink daily. Some in moderation. Some binge on weekends. Until there is a real clear definition most won't even know.

I know people that drink every day off and at nights even if they have to work. Only one I know gets consistently fall down trunk and blacking out.
One of the best definitions I have ever heard of came from AA and it talked about the phenom of craving. If a person wants the second or third drink more than the first then that's a sure sign to turn back.
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Old 07-14-2019, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Ro cha cha, NY
3,085 posts, read 4,224,727 times
Reputation: 5406
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1AngryTaxPayer View Post
Forgetting what happened or p*ssing people off are sure signs of a problem. As far as most people though, what defines an alcoholic. Every definition is different depending on who you talk to. Some people drink daily. Some in moderation. Some binge on weekends. Until there is a real clear definition most won't even know.

I know people that drink every day off and at nights even if they have to work. Only one I know gets consistently fall down trunk and blacking out.


There is a clear definition. Stop acting like there's not. Are there different stages to alcoholism? Yes, there are. Perhaps that's where your confusion lies. People don't get to late stage alcoholism/addiction over night. That's why alcoholism/ drug addiction is a progressive disease. Simply meaning, it gets worse.


See, the answers were there all along, you just don't want to listen. It's ok to disagree, but if you continually ignore facts in favor of some trumped up/ ego argument, then you aren't ready to hear it anyway. You have to have an open mind, which many on this thread, clearly don't.


If you are not a professional or know nothing about addiction, then I suggest you stay off the thread, if you truly want to help. Otherwise, what is your ambition? What's the point, in regards to the OP? Are you really trying to help him? How would you feel if he never got help and died, because of all of this misinformation. Because when someone is reaching out for help, they need hope. Not all this other crap.


Op, talk to a professional. If you want any answers or information you can contact me through DM. Good luck OP, I've about had it with this thread. Bowing out to all of you so called "professionals."


Tabula, thank you for trying. Kudos to you.

Last edited by supermanpansy; 07-14-2019 at 02:48 PM..
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Old 07-14-2019, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
1,163 posts, read 585,190 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
I have a number of clients who swear by it. Mileage definitely varies.
Right. Like I said, I'm not saying it doesn't work for anyone.

And to everyone else, unless you have experienced what it's like to be addicted to alcohol you have no idea what you're talking about, sorry.

No friggin' idea.
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Old 07-14-2019, 06:02 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
3,552 posts, read 2,459,034 times
Reputation: 24107
Quote:
Originally Posted by J0Dee View Post
In regards to Alcoholics Anonymous, I would like to address Mr. Boring's and loose cannon's statements about AA. Just to give insight.

Alcoholics Anonymous has helped many people due to the fellowship involved, and the commitments that members make in helping one another. AA, NA, CA and CMA are all interchangeable. It is not uncommon for Alcoholics to say, 'miss an AA meeting' and decide to go to the next one that is an NA meeting. The 12 principles are the same.

I was an addict for 15 years. I decided that I could not stop on my own, and that I needed to surround myself with a community of those that are going through the same thing I am going through.

I went to a CMA meeting (Crystal Meth Anonymous).. And saw the members. They looked pretty rough, and even the group leader stated "There is an AA meeting tomorrow. I think you will find that the people in this group are very well suited to what you need, very committed. The members of this CMA meeting do not have a long track record. But you seem very commited.."

So, I did! Met very good people who I am close with till this day. They came into the music studio that I was living at, took all my clothes.. Discarded the baggies.. ( lol..), got me work, into a sober living where I was tested randomly... I did not want to go through the rehab route. It did not work for me, because I did not have the funds.

So all in all.. I just want to say, it was the 'fellowship' that helped me. It made me want to go on in life, knowing that people cared about me. I felt worthless.
It also kept me sober! I kept telling myself "here are all these people, helping me to get better.. Putting time and effort into me. What a punk I would be if I went out and got high again!"
Now, I'm an engineer. One of the women who helped me has cancer now. I pay her cable bills, I go shopping for her.. I love them.

To the OP, one size does not fit all. But, I think it would help to see others that have been through your situation, your blackouts.. tell their stories, and see what's working for them!
Now this, my friends, is a post worth reading. I love it and J0Dee knows a thing or two about life. OP I hope you're still out there listening/reading your comments - yes some are very negative but focus on the positive and that's who you'll meet going to AA, counseling, talking to a pastor or someone you trust to keep your confidence. It's all in the people you surround yourself with. There's 7 billion of us out there, and they can't all be bad.

I talk a big game, I am exactly where the OP is but I have made concrete rules for myself. No, they don't always work but there's one that I adhere to vehemently now, and that's no drinking and driving. Yes, I'm THAT person or I was, not anymore. I realize this is a sensitive subject and there are many, many closet alcoholics out there who are high-functioning like me. It's the people you would least expect sometimes.

Prohibition is not the solution. We see how well that worked in our wicked past and that's about how well it will work with shaming someone into doing something. They will always find a way to get that substance and abuse it, if there is not the right kind of support. Or there is money to be made. There is really no one solution to alcoholism and other addictions. It's like J0Dee said, one size don't fit all.
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Old 07-14-2019, 06:37 PM
 
Location: Proxima Centauri
4,853 posts, read 2,009,153 times
Reputation: 5329
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Grandeur View Post
I have an alcohol problem. The last time I drank was 5 days ago. I got drunk 5 days ago. 3 people wanted to beat me up but I dont remember what happened. They were threating me to beat me up good. I started running and went inside a cafe nearby and told them to call the police. I was safe after that.

One day I will get beaten up pretty bad when drunk. There have been times I haven't drunk for as long as 2-3 months. Then I drank again. I dont remember some parts of the day when I drink.

Is there anybody who has a problem with alcohol?

If you can't stop at two drinks a day, you need to stop completely so that drinking is no longer on your mind.
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Old 07-14-2019, 06:51 PM
 
Location: Staten Island, NY
8,801 posts, read 7,159,797 times
Reputation: 8336
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonyafd View Post
If you can't stop at two drinks a day, you need to stop completely so that drinking is no longer on your mind.
Are you directing this standard to the OP or in general?
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