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Old 07-14-2019, 06:52 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, N.M.
224 posts, read 122,388 times
Reputation: 583

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mister 7 View Post
I've never tried AA but every alcoholic I know who has says it's ineffective and/or depressing.

I don't know one person who says it works for them.

Not saying it doesn't work, just saying what I've heard.

I personally don't feel 12 step thing would work for me.
If you go to an AA meeting and it is depressing and a drag, don't go back. Find another. There are all kinds. I've been to plenty of meetings that were downright hilarious (but ultimately on topic). Groups have their own personalities and you'd need to find one that suits you. AA phone volunteers often can steer you to a good group.

Think of those two fraternity houses at the beginning of "Animal House," if that makes sense. Less the beer, of course.

I know many people for whom AA is a blessing.
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Old 07-14-2019, 07:01 PM
 
Location: USA
2,692 posts, read 2,059,263 times
Reputation: 4435
If ya feeling 10 feet tall and bulletproof picking a fight while drinking then yes, that's a problem.
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Old 07-14-2019, 07:55 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,438 posts, read 32,326,768 times
Reputation: 19965
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
There is a clear definition. Stop acting like there's not. Are there different stages to alcoholism? Yes, there are. Perhaps that's where your confusion lies. People don't get to late stage alcoholism/addiction over night. That's why alcoholism/ drug addiction is a progressive disease. Simply meaning, it gets worse.


See, the answers were there all along, you just don't want to listen. It's ok to disagree, but if you continually ignore facts in favor of some trumped up/ ego argument, then you aren't ready to hear it anyway. You have to have an open mind, which many on this thread, clearly don't.


If you are not a professional or know nothing about addiction, then I suggest you stay off the thread, if you truly want to help. Otherwise, what is your ambition? What's the point, in regards to the OP? Are you really trying to help him? How would you feel if he never got help and died, because of all of this misinformation. Because when someone is reaching out for help, they need hope. Not all this other crap.


Op, talk to a professional. If you want any answers or information you can contact me through DM. Good luck OP, I've about had it with this thread. Bowing out to all of you so called "professionals."


Tabula, thank you for trying. Kudos to you.
^ This right here is why more people don't seek help. They get pounced on by the so called "Experts". For most of them if you drink at all, smoke at all, do any sort of legal or illegal drug at all you need "Saved" and only they know the answer. Usually because they can't get over something bad happening in THEIR lives.


I've been around alcoholics, drug users, smokers etc all my life and there is no box any of them can be put into because all of their situations are different.
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Old 07-14-2019, 07:57 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,438 posts, read 32,326,768 times
Reputation: 19965
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
I appreciate the honesty. And with that, people will minimize what you have just said. I appreciate you (especially in a thread like this) telling your story, knowing this crap that you were going to get. People need to learn how to listen. Too many people have claimed that they have no control,yet it's all on deaf ears. That's freaking sad. As if anyone would make up the fact that they are powerless over alcohol. I mean, really, just shaking my damn head.....
Learn how to listen....hilarious.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:01 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,438 posts, read 32,326,768 times
Reputation: 19965
Quote:
Originally Posted by L8Gr8Apost8 View Post
One of the best definitions I have ever heard of came from AA and it talked about the phenom of craving. If a person wants the second or third drink more than the first then that's a sure sign to turn back.
That's a pretty good definition but would go against those teetotalers that think if you drink at all you not only have a problem, you are the problem.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:12 PM
 
Location: minnesota
6,420 posts, read 2,154,259 times
Reputation: 2202
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1AngryTaxPayer View Post
That's a pretty good definition but would go against those teetotalers that think if you drink at all you not only have a problem, you are the problem.
I broke my off switch so I can compare before and after. That's what sticks out in my mind as the difference.

I used an online forum to work through my issues. About half the people where also in AA. I had several people tell me I wasn't a real alcoholic because I was staying sober without AA. I think what they really meant is that I was not dealing with as serious mental health issues as they were.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:26 PM
 
Location: San Diego
35,438 posts, read 32,326,768 times
Reputation: 19965
Quote:
Originally Posted by L8Gr8Apost8 View Post
I broke my off switch so I can compare before and after. That's what sticks out in my mind as the difference.

I used an online forum to work through my issues. About half the people where also in AA. I had several people tell me I wasn't a real alcoholic because I was staying sober without AA. I think what they really meant is that I was not dealing with as serious mental health issues as they were.
That's a good self estimate and tells me you weren't as buried as you thought you were. But, good job anyway.

Here in SD we have so many homeless and many are walking dead types from self medication.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:45 PM
 
Location: minnesota
6,420 posts, read 2,154,259 times
Reputation: 2202
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1AngryTaxPayer View Post
That's a good self estimate and tells me you weren't as buried as you thought you were. But, good job anyway.

Here in SD we have so many homeless and many are walking dead types from self medication.
I was part of an online forum during recovery (entirely voluntary) so my idea of what a typical alcoholic looks like is probably different than what people usually think of. I think most of us tap out before we get to that end stage. I had to stop saying I quit drinking because I was an alcoholic and start saying I couldn't control my drinking so I stopped. Same thing, totally different reaction from people. There were an awefull lot of people just like me on that forum; families, jobs, clean records, and a secret.
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Old 07-17-2019, 01:01 AM
 
Location: Northern Wisconsin
8,894 posts, read 7,767,007 times
Reputation: 15395
Yes, my problem is my doctor doesnt want me to drink it any more.
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Old 07-17-2019, 11:50 AM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
56,463 posts, read 54,875,243 times
Reputation: 67073
Quote:
Originally Posted by nazz View Post
If you go to an AA meeting and it is depressing and a drag, don't go back. Find another. There are all kinds. I've been to plenty of meetings that were downright hilarious (but ultimately on topic). Groups have their own personalities and you'd need to find one that suits you. AA phone volunteers often can steer you to a good group.

Think of those two fraternity houses at the beginning of "Animal House," if that makes sense. Less the beer, of course.

I know many people for whom AA is a blessing.
My daughter became involved in ypaa (young people's AA). It gave her an active social life without alcohol. They do some fun stuff--camping, bonfires, etc. When she visited me last year, she went to a meeting but said it was more sedate and a completely different vibe than what she is used to, but that didn't stop her from going.

As a matter of fact, she went to Hong Kong last year for an academic presentation and now is FB friends with two people she met at a meeting there, and when she and her bf went to Spain for vacation this year, they found meetings to attend while they were there.
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