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Old 07-18-2019, 11:37 AM
 
1,216 posts, read 1,493,489 times
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How did you let go?
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Old 07-18-2019, 11:41 AM
 
Location: San Antonio/Houston/Tricity
38,092 posts, read 55,882,569 times
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Suicidal????? I conduct myself properly and I just don't care what people say about me.
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Old 07-18-2019, 11:46 AM
 
Location: SoCal again
16,133 posts, read 12,876,178 times
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Tell us what happened.

Are you suicidal? Do you need help right now?
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Old 07-18-2019, 11:50 AM
 
2,614 posts, read 1,952,691 times
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The harsh word from others sometime is hard to bear, but you can avoid suicidal thoughts by focusing on doing something else in your life, such as playing some basketball or go do some running.

I personally think is normal for people to have suicidal thoughts, but you simply need to know how to manage it.

The world we live in today are cruel and selfish, so do the best you can to stay well and alive.
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Old 07-18-2019, 12:01 PM
 
Location: Germany
178 posts, read 31,436 times
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I've simply accepted the truth that life is sometimes difficult, that not everyone will like me, and sometimes you may be wrong or do something wrong, but it's OK.
Everyone makes mistakes. We are human. There's always a reason behind a failure. Sometimes that reason is just the truth. We are afraid, we are alone, we are weak, and it's perfectly ok because everyone is. Everyone feels afraid sometimes, everyone feels alone sometimes, everyone is weak sometimes. And it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter what you think now. What matters is what you think next. You have come to understand that life is tough because of something that happened. There's nothing to get over. Life is life. It's bittersweet, it's messy, it has it's ups and downs you should love it for all of it. Look at it from afar and don't take it so seriously. If you look at something from really far, it is just a point. A point in your life that wasn't good. Clearly you've seen better days. Don't you wanna have better days? Wasn't that summer amazing? Isn't that friend of yours so funny that sometimes you can't breathe from laughter?
That beautiful movie that made you feel things!

Everything is worth it. And I want everything.

That's what I thought.
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Old 07-18-2019, 12:32 PM
 
Location: East Midlands, UK
727 posts, read 266,187 times
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All the time. For being ugly, stupid and useless.

How do I deal with it? Self harm, self medicstion and avoiding people as much as possible, especially kids and teens who still target me as if I was one of them.
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Old 07-18-2019, 01:25 PM
 
Location: on the wind
7,200 posts, read 2,964,860 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazy-Cat-Lady View Post
All the time. For being ugly, stupid and useless.

How do I deal with it? Self harm, self medicstion and avoiding people as much as possible, especially kids and teens who still target me as if I was one of them.
FWIW, doesn't really sound as if you are "dealing with it" or fighting it. Sorry to hear that.
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Old 07-18-2019, 01:38 PM
 
Location: SoCal again
16,133 posts, read 12,876,178 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazy-Cat-Lady View Post
All the time. For being ugly, stupid and useless.

How do I deal with it? Self harm, self medicstion and avoiding people as much as possible, especially kids and teens who still target me as if I was one of them.
I am sorry. I have followed your story over the years and am sorry to hear it has not improved.
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Old 07-18-2019, 01:39 PM
 
Location: on the wind
7,200 posts, read 2,964,860 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by homenj View Post
How did you let go?
Its tough, because it is easy to let others define you.

I find it helps to put their comments into perspective.

First, I ask myself if what they said was true or not. Most of the time it isn't, so I can dismiss it as malicious; not worth the stress.

Then I ask myself whether that person has some agenda behind their remarks...are they jealous? Just a nasty person to other people? Are they so buried in their own self-imposed misery they have to spread it around to include others? If so, maybe a little bit of patience or compassion can help me dismiss what they said.

Then I ask myself why someone would say or think what they do. Or, whether they are the only person to say such things about me. If they are the only one, maybe its them, not me. If others also tend to have those comments, maybe I need to dig into it. Did I give them any reason for it? If not, I can drop it as irrelevant. If yes, I may have done something to create that impression I start working on why. That can lead to self improvement or self awareness. Not a bad thing to re-assess yourself sometimes.
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Old 07-18-2019, 03:28 PM
 
419 posts, read 83,068 times
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For the most part, I get far more frustrated and upset over stuff that I say... that does often eat away at me.

As for other people's opinions, these fall into three categories:
  1. What they say has little to do with me and more to do with them and their ego. These are easy to spot and even easier to dismiss for they hold no weight and are of no consequence.

  2. Their criticism/observation is valid and constructive, in which case I'm grateful and look at it as an opportunity to learn and improve.

  3. Their remarks do hold some merit (i.e. they are not without reason) but on closer inspection are largely uninformed and relatively easy to counter; however because they resonate with my deeply held insecurities and fears and add fuel to the flame, they are impossible to dismiss without addressing my own insecurities first. Here, the fault is clearly not with the person uttering the painful remarks but with my harboring these insidious thoughts to begin with and unwillingness or inability to deal with my own personal demons. To rise to these remarks is to rise against those demons and it could be quite a challenge, which is why those who already battle suicidal ideation can experience the resurgence of dark thoughts when confronted with words that are just a little too close to heart.

With me it all just comes down to stubbornness. I refuse to be goaded by other people whilst I'm still in control of my faculties. If the problem lies with me then it's my responsibility. If I can't or choose not to deal with it, then I can't really hold other people noticing my weaknesses against them (it's like getting upset at someone telling you your fly is open). And since these insecurities don't just appear out of nothing, I can't really justify falling apart because someone happened to bring them to the surface. So other people become immaterial in the equation where I'm the main variable. For this reason, other people's words rarely harm me. Here I remain my own worst and biggest enemy.

Last edited by Itzpapalotl; 07-18-2019 at 03:37 PM..
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