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Old Yesterday, 10:29 AM
 
339 posts, read 102,996 times
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Has anyone here ever been in therapy only to eventually realize their therapist had more issues than they do. This has been the case with my last two therapists. I left the last one 10 years ago and have been doing just dandy on my own since. I realized this one had problems when it became clear she actually had a pretty specific image in her mind about what I should be doing with my life (getting an adjunct position at X university; consciously trying to get more friends in specific ways, etc.) When I said I wasn’t interested in her plan (when it was revealed after 2 months of therapy), she suddenly didn’t have room on her schedule for me anymore. Oh well, no great loss.

The therapist before that was really empathetic, but he told me one day about his belief in angels and other such things, and I felt like I had had enough at that point.

Anyone else have an interesting story along these lines?
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Old Yesterday, 11:01 AM
 
Location: Germany
222 posts, read 40,107 times
Reputation: 430
Dunno, I once tried going to a therapist, told him about the rough patch I was going through, at which point he asked me what my problem was and I said: "actually I don't think I have an actual problem. It was just hard". He told me I was right and that people who go to him have other problems. Didn't go again.
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Old Yesterday, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Wasilla, AK
7,399 posts, read 4,265,636 times
Reputation: 16275
Why do you think they have a higher suicide rate than the general population? Get a dog. The therapy is much less expensive and they give you unconditional love.
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Old Yesterday, 12:18 PM
 
Location: Colorado (PA at heart)
8,979 posts, read 13,763,390 times
Reputation: 11713
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jill_Schramm View Post
Has anyone here ever been in therapy only to eventually realize their therapist had more issues than they do. This has been the case with my last two therapists. I left the last one 10 years ago and have been doing just dandy on my own since. I realized this one had problems when it became clear she actually had a pretty specific image in her mind about what I should be doing with my life (getting an adjunct position at X university; consciously trying to get more friends in specific ways, etc.) When I said I wasnít interested in her plan (when it was revealed after 2 months of therapy), she suddenly didnít have room on her schedule for me anymore. Oh well, no great loss.

The therapist before that was really empathetic, but he told me one day about his belief in angels and other such things, and I felt like I had had enough at that point.

Anyone else have an interesting story along these lines?
It doesn't really sound like they have "issues" - particularly the guy who believes in angels, it sounds to me like you just can't handle a therapist who has different opinions and beliefs than you do on certain topics. You're never going to find someone who shares exactly all the same beliefs as you.

The more recent woman sounds like maybe she might have been a little bit controlling, but she probably felt those goals were the best things for your self improvement and for all we know, maybe she's right.
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Old Yesterday, 12:36 PM
 
339 posts, read 102,996 times
Reputation: 655
Quote:
Originally Posted by PA2UK View Post
It doesn't really sound like they have "issues" - particularly the guy who believes in angels, it sounds to me like you just can't handle a therapist who has different opinions and beliefs than you do on certain topics. You're never going to find someone who shares exactly all the same beliefs as you.

The more recent woman sounds like maybe she might have been a little bit controlling, but she probably felt those goals were the best things for your self improvement and for all we know, maybe she's right.
She wasnít right, as it turns out. Also, angels donít exist. Not a matter of opinion.
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Old Yesterday, 12:39 PM
 
10,509 posts, read 9,465,877 times
Reputation: 16146
Even a good coach isn't always able to play the game.

Meaning that with all of the formal education to become a therapist, it doesn't guarantee that they won't have issues in their own lives.

When emotions are involved, logic flies out the window.
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Old Yesterday, 01:20 PM
 
Location: Michigan
6 posts, read 565 times
Reputation: 46
I sought therapy once. I was 40 and they said they would set me up with someone that fit me. I get to the appointment and it's a 25-year-old. She could've passed for one of my 16 year old daughter's GFs. I'm like she's going to tell me how to cope with my issues? She hasn't even lived yet! She has no idea about adult issues, yet!
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Old Yesterday, 01:23 PM
 
Location: Michigan
6 posts, read 565 times
Reputation: 46
We must have the same brother.
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Old Yesterday, 01:24 PM
 
2,149 posts, read 908,183 times
Reputation: 5265
I was depressed my first time at college and went to a psychologist at the campus health center for about 6 weeks. Finally concluded the psychologist was crazier than I was. That was the most useful insight I got out of the sessions. Never been to one since. I think for me the key to dealing with any chronic mental or physical isses is acceptance. Stop fighting it and accept it. In time it will get better or you will get used to living with it. The less you feed it with fear and anxiety and attention, the sooner you can get back to normal.
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Old Yesterday, 01:56 PM
 
339 posts, read 102,996 times
Reputation: 655
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobspez View Post
I was depressed my first time at college and went to a psychologist at the campus health center for about 6 weeks. Finally concluded the psychologist was crazier than I was. That was the most useful insight I got out of the sessions. Never been to one since. I think for me the key to dealing with any chronic mental or physical isses is acceptance. Stop fighting it and accept it. In time it will get better or you will get used to living with it. The less you feed it with fear and anxiety and attention, the sooner you can get back to normal.
I like this. So true. Sometimes, there is great wisdom in simply embracing reality for what it is and letting go of our need to make it different.
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