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Agreed. I am friendly and social, but that has a time limit. As an introvert, it’s like having my battery drained, so it needs to be recharged by being alone or at least in quiet. I’ve always preferred friendships one on one instead of a group. I’m
What I often see confused is shyness and introversion. Shy people may skew toward introversion but all introverts are not shy. I don’t have social anxiety or a fear of talking to others.
Yes, definitely. As I get older, I seem to enjoy more alone time. People can start to get on your nerves after a while, especially if they're negative and complain a lot.
Sounds like what you're saying is the extroverts you know have found a new way to "explain" introverts to themselves. I would agree that extroverts in general don't understand introversion and see it as some sort of mental "disease." But I'm not sure how they made the leap from introvert to autism.
I believe simply because it's the latest thing, or at least the latest thing in the popular press. Perhaps they misinterpret not talking constantly as being "non-verbal." On the same day, another extroverted friend described yet another quiet, serious, introverted person as "an alien." I suppose I should have titled this "Is Introversion Now Seen as Autism?" My bad.
I think it's become a national pastime to diagnose mental health issues ever since the advent of the home computer. Everyone who can get their hands on a DSM thinks they've got it pegged.
If we truly had a many diagnosable people in RL as people claim on forums we'd be in worse shape than we currently are.
Which is much of what happens on this particular board, actually...
Quote:
Originally Posted by kgordeeva
Introversion is completely different from autism.. Introverts prefer a lot of alone time compared extroverts. They're not weird or can't read social cues...
Exactly. Now, some people see it as "weird" when someone doesn't want to be the life of the party (that's a symptom of people who can't possibly understand that other people might not be exactly like they are). But not being able to read social cues is different. It's different from liking or even preferring alone time, and it's different even from other forms of being socially-awkward (not knowing how to make small talk, being unsure how to handle some difficult social situations especially if one hasn't encountered them before to be able to learn how to navigate them, having "stage fright" in large groups, etc.). And, frankly, it can be a problem, because it alienates one from other people-- past the point of "Bob is hard/boring to talk to" and can get right into "Bob is downright offensive."
And "quiet, reserved, and serious" are, again, not nearly the same thing as "comes on too strong/comes across as creepy/talks too much/says offensive things {uinintentionally}," which is often the problem for people who can't read social cues (because they can't see when someone else doesn't want to discuss a topic, when they're making someone uncomfortable, etc. And this is also different from someone who inadvertently does this, but then sees the reaction they're getting and stops-- people who can't read social cues don't stop, because they literally don't know they should).
I understand the difference. My point is, people who know nothing about autism shouldn't label people who are simply quiet and unassuming as "autistic" rather than "introverted" or just "quiet."
Re: "not reading social cues," in this particular case turned out to mean the quiet one had invited one of the extroverts to do something, and the extrovert didn't want to, but said he did and just kept making excuses not to. Apparently the quiet person was supposed to disbelieve the excuses and realize the extrovert really didn't want to do it, but was being fake about it. I guess the problem there is being honest and assuming others are, too...
I agree that introverts can accept extroverts as they are, but extroverts are either trying to "fix" or "diagnose" introverts. You often hear, "Why are you so quiet?" but never "Why are you so loud?"
There's always going to be misunderstandings about personality differences, but ever since Susan Cain's book came out, there's been a lot more awareness about what introversion really is. Before it was just scoring an "I" on the Myers-Briggs test you might have to take at work. During the early pandemic, when extroverts were climbing the walls at not being able to go out as much, introverts were super vocal about how we were living our best lives. Believing that introversion is the same as autism in the year 2023 is being willfully obtuse.
The exact dividing lines between psychological diagnosis categories are arbitrary. That said, "classical" autism is different from introversion in that autism usually involves major difficulties in common social skills, whereas introversion can be simply a preference to do things alone or reduce the amount of time they spend with others.
The OP may be thinking of Asperger Syndrome, which is on the autism spectrum. It used to be a diagnosis on its own but no longer.
Most people who have AS are introverts, but not all introverts have AS.
And another thing that's interesting - a lot of people with AS also have synesthesia.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
During the early pandemic, when extroverts were climbing the walls at not being able to go out as much, introverts were super vocal about how we were living our best lives. Believing that introversion is the same as autism in the year 2023 is being willfully obtuse.
You have that right! As someone who is an introvert and has both synesthesia and AS, I have to tell you guys, my life didn't change at all during the pandemic. When people would talk about going crazy not being able to go out, I honestly thought for a long time people were just making a joke.
I've been noticing for quite a while now the tendency to attribute certain variations in personality to "neurodivergence" or someone "being on the spectrum." No longer is someone described as just "shy," "reserved," "quiet," or even "eccentric," but rather "possibly autistic." Diseases and disorders come in and out of vogue, and currently it seems autism is fashionable or the Disease du Jour. However, I was really disturbed by a recent conversation among friends/acquaintances in which another friend, who was absent, was described as such for his "attention to detail," "indecision," and failure to heed "social cues." It should be noted that the friends discussing this introverted person are all extreme extroverts to the point of being party animals and obviously simply don't like or can't relate to this person's personality. I argued that there was no evidence of this -- some people are just low-key and serious in contrast to them -- but they probably ended up concluding that I'm autistic, too, LOL. I find this pathologizing of differences scary.
I would find 'friends' of this type scary. Drop pretenses and drop them from your Christmas card list. As humans, they present as arrogant, boisterous, and hypercritical. You won't rub off on them and you don't do well with them. Flush 'em.
I believe simply because it's the latest thing, or at least the latest thing in the popular press. Perhaps they misinterpret not talking constantly as being "non-verbal." On the same day, another extroverted friend described yet another quiet, serious, introverted person as "an alien." I suppose I should have titled this "Is Introversion Now Seen as Autism?" My bad.
To most people, no. Introversion is not seen as autism. It seems your aquintances are foolish.
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