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Old 07-17-2008, 08:58 AM
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I am generally quiet in a group, not as much shy as observant. I'm chatty when with good friends and often like to talk to strangers in line at the store, etc.
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Old 07-17-2008, 09:08 AM
Location: Tennessee
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When I first read the title I thought it said How Bi is your personality...seriously!....maybe an interesting one in the future.

I'm as outspoken as the people around me allow, I can get away with about anything. Love messing with little old ladies in the check out line, I'll tell the cashier to go ahead and ring up my stuff on their tab...lol that usually gets them talking!
I love talking and in the right setting I can work a room with the best of them.
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Old 05-16-2012, 02:30 PM
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It depends on the vibe/chemistry I have with a person. Sometimes I can talk for hours with someone or just shutdown if the conversation becomes boring or one way. Most importantly you also have to be a good listener (i am not) & genuinely interested in what they are are saying. Its good to be informed about a variety of stuff like entertainment, politics, weather, etc. & pick a topic of common interest. I dont like sports so I usually walk away when conversation in the group goes in that direction. I cant feign interest coz my eyes start drooping.
Unfortunately celebrities have to keep a front & i think they hide their real personalities bcoz everything they do gets blown out of proportion.
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Old 05-16-2012, 02:54 PM
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Originally Posted by total_genius View Post
It seems like many people in the public eye have quite interesting personalities. I can think of people like Regis Philbin, Larry King, Jay Leno, etc. These people are popular because they have such dynamic personalities....
Three glib, superficial, self-engrossed guys with the collective depth of a mud puddle. Surely you jest?
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Old 05-16-2012, 03:56 PM
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A "gift of gab"? So you mean, those of us that aren't loud, are lacking a "gift?" That sucks. I'm lacking enough qualities to make me a normal human being as it is.

From your perspective, no, I lack that gift. I'm a quiet and reserved person. I don't speak unless spoken too (90% of the time). But this is partially related to my hearing loss and leaving me no choice but to be quiet and reserved. I once recall seeing some interviews with some celebs who claimed they are generally quiet and shy, but when it comes to their job, they seem the opposite (b/c they're on TV and have the expectations of being social). I'd be like those people, if I were famous. No one would know who I "really" was, unless they were a close friend/family member.
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Old 05-16-2012, 11:57 PM
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Originally Posted by Dancingearth View Post
Years ago when I said I was shy someone told me "get over yourself." Ouch, but the more I thought about it, I could see he was right. A friend told me that I am actually reserved. Reserved is someone who watches and thinks and then chooses words to communicate when they are ready--the shy part comes in when I don't communicate what I have to say because I am afraid of looking bad or being misunderstood. If I really want to say something, I do. If I don't, it's my problem, no one should have to invite me to talk. But it's nice when someone asks so I try and do that for others. Kindness is always good. Now when I stumble over words and people are looking at me odd, I try to remember to laugh and say "you should see me on a bad day." Personally, I think I express myself better in writing than conversation.

Now that I am older (55) I am both extroverted and introverted. I have a friend who would watch me and say I'd talk to anyone and I'd say "and what's your point?" I can be outgoing and bubbly but I have to be in the right situation and mood--now it's when I find someone interested in my passions. I've heard all the drama and it grows old. I don't watch TV so just start a conversation about tv shows and I'm asleep. Since I graduated from college in December I seem to be in a place where mostly I want to read about history and do art--pretty solitary--or be around people interested in these things or volunteering to help others.

Maybe this has to do with getting older. I think the older I get, the less I need to talk but I find more of a need to write (more depth than conversation) or express myself through art.

I think this need to be "colorful" and "on" all the time is a product of our hyper culture. Has TV created the idea that an interesting person has to be colorful and "big"? What makes someone colorful? or Big? Each of us is colorful and has a story to tell that is unique yet similar. What do others think?

Let me sit by an adobe wall, spin my wool, and look at the blue sky. If you want to talk sit next to me, spin some wool along with me, and tell me about your life (or sit by a campfire, hand out food at the soup kitchen, take a class together--doing something together while we figure out life and get to know each other.) Personally I'd take real over someone being colorful and entertaining.
Good point...the crux of shyness is basically a fear of 'putting yourself out there' because of what people will think and is different from being introverted and somewhat different from being reserved. For me, it's a bit of both. A fear of what others will say but also I'm naturally not ALWAYS talkative and sometimes I just can't be bothered putting things into words.

I'm not the life of the party but I can hold a conversation and be quite jovial if the situation calls for it.
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Old 05-17-2012, 12:28 PM
Location: Wilsonville, OR
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I was shy and quiet as a child. As I've grown older and experienced the horror and ultimate let-down that is the world, my reticence and utter self-containment and control have grown exponentially stronger. Now I permanently hide behind a carefully constructed and projected exterior mask in order to minimize potential emotional hurt for myself. Every potential action or word is analyzed and examined to ensure the least negative possible outcome.
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Old 05-17-2012, 03:11 PM
Location: Middle America
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It's entirely dependent upon situation.

When I am with a new group of people where I don't know many, I will hang back and observe people, make some assessments before jumping in and attempting outgoing interaction. I am overall pretty low-key and understated when I do participate. When I am leading my classroom of middle schoolers, however, I am high-energy and attentiongrabbing in a way that I'm not with peers. I tailor my persona to what fits a given situation. I spent years as a newspaper reporter, and learned early on that you get access to more information and a more complete picture of things if you have the ability to be something of a chameleon.
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Old 05-17-2012, 10:55 PM
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Well according to the NEO PI-R, I score:
- very high on openness: which makes me very open-minded and artistic
- low on agreeableness: which makes me a skeptic, not easily influenced by others
- low on neuroticism: which makes me fairly easy-going and calm (I'm glad we did this test after the mid-term exam or I might have had a different result )
- average to high on extraversion: which makes me friendly, dominant but not overbearing, and a good leader
- and average to high on conscientiousness: which makes me fairly ambitious but not overly so (wish I was higher on this scale).

I took this test and a few others as a practical part of the subject (Psych Testing) I am doing now for my psychology degree. I did the SDS vocational inventory as well and tested as AIS which is artistic, investigative, and social.

I think anyone who knows anything about psychology could get a fairly good idea of my personality type from all of that.

Do I have a big personality? When I want to, I can have, but I usually prefer to sit in the background and observe. It really depends on my mood and the company I am in. I can talk a lot if I am interested in the conversation and I am with like-minded people. If I find myself amongst people I have little in common with I tend to be quiet because I know I can be too opinionated at times. In this situation I generally don't want to be rude so I just shut up and make polite conversation about something they are interested in (I usually find this out by asking lots of questions, people love to talk about themselves). I'm not sure about being colourful, I suppose that really is up to the person listening to me. I certainly have some colourful stories from when I was younger but they would require very specific conditions to come out in conversation.
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Old 06-21-2012, 10:04 AM
Location: Southwest Desert
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Most of the time I probably seem a bit "bland." I play "wallflower" (or "secret-spy") a lot and just take-in what's going on around me. (Do a lot of listening and observing.)...If someone speaks to me I'm friendly and polite and I'll engage in conversations to varying "degrees." (Depends on how I feel about the person. Sometimes I just do more listening.)...When I go through check-out lines in stores I'm attentive and friendly. (But don't always talk too much.).. I have an animated and expressive personality inside of me. (That stays "hidden" most of the time. Guess I tend to play "Clark Kent" with a secret identity or ??)...I let "other sides" of me come out when I'm with close friends or when I strike-up an interesting conversation with a stranger and want to give-it my "all!"
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