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Old 09-05-2009, 09:16 PM
13,779 posts, read 23,224,768 times
Reputation: 7378


Discuss the topic and NOT other members OR their family...

Old 09-05-2009, 10:30 PM
3,088 posts, read 7,639,938 times
Reputation: 2024
I love how the nice friendly child lovers are bashing the evil mean kiddie haters.
Old 09-07-2009, 04:20 PM
Location: south Florida
63 posts, read 331,073 times
Reputation: 65
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post
Well, here is my thing:

I completely understand how some people do not want to have children. They are hard work, very hard work, even if it's just one.

However, I do not understand how people can dislike children. I will not go as far as to say that PWDC are bad people, I just don't understand how can anyone not like them! Children are the most precious, innocent human beings on this earth, who are still learning and absorbing this world. PWDC should not be anywhere near children if they can help it. Children do not need any negative vibes around them, as it is this world is cruel. I don't even know why I brought my child into this cruel world that's not getting any better, but yet again, it wasn't me, it was God's choice.

And although, I don't usually bring religion into Relationship forum, Christ said that whoever welcomes a child into his home will be welcomed in Christ's home and whoever rejects him, will be rejected as well.

Be kind to our children! They are our future, we are leaving the world to them. We all were children once!
Well said!
Old 09-08-2009, 09:12 AM
943 posts, read 1,975,858 times
Reputation: 515
Originally Posted by Towhee View Post
I haven't had time to read much of this...but I am wondering if a lot of what is meant by "not liking children" is refering to the behavior of modern children as a whole? It seems to me there is very little respect taught to children now-a-days; not for law, not for teachers, not for elderly, and espacially not for their own parents... Many children of the past several decades are totally self-centered. It is "all about me" for many of them.
I grew up in the 30s and 40s. Children as a whole were taught a lot more respect than they are now. Television programs are full of the disrespect towards adults by children.
And before I am accused of having no chidren, I have a 51 year old son and three teenage granddaughters. I used to teach children in bible classes, from 1st graders on up to teenage girls.
I am one who used to sincerely love all children. I am afraid I have changed that attitude. Now there only a rare few that I care to be around..and it is not because of my age. It is because of what I said above...
I agree, with this.

I think things have changed radically.

Some kids are so badly behaved it grinds my gears too.

What gets me about children of today, is how they always expect someone else to entertain them. They seem to have so little imagination or intiative, I do not know if this is from public schooling, but something is very wrong. kids do not even play like they used to.
Old 09-08-2009, 11:42 AM
Location: CA
2,464 posts, read 5,690,869 times
Reputation: 2587
Originally Posted by nitokenshi View Post
I love how the nice friendly child lovers are bashing the evil mean kiddie haters.
They deserve it. They could pick on people who can defend themselves verbally... but they don't. "Let's choose to dislike the weakest among us." Pathetic.
Old 09-08-2009, 11:44 AM
Location: CA
2,464 posts, read 5,690,869 times
Reputation: 2587
Originally Posted by Skyscrapercrazy View Post
Even if they lie unintentionally, they are still evil little brats.

Most of my close friends understand that I don't like children but when I tell someone new that I rather dislike kids, they get all surprised and horrified, like everyone is supposed to love them.
It's not the kids who are "evil little brats." It's YOUR interpretation of their behavior. It's subjective and not fact. There's a difference.
Old 09-08-2009, 11:45 AM
Location: CA
2,464 posts, read 5,690,869 times
Reputation: 2587
Originally Posted by dominus View Post
I greatly dislike children but I am a very nice person (mostly).
Somehow... I find that hard to believe.
Old 09-08-2009, 11:52 AM
809 posts, read 2,551,709 times
Reputation: 489
When I say to someone "I can't stand kids"..... usually it's because I am witnessing a VERY ill behaved child that is grating on my nerves..... (I work retail so I see a LOT of them. They like to run around my store screaming at the top of their lungs, knocking crap over, spilling food and drinks on the floor, etc)

With that being said I actually DO like children. I like the well behaved children. The ones with manners, the ones who are polite, the ones who know what RESPECT is.

Before ANYONE passes judgement maybe you should ASK someone why they don't like kids. MAYBE they have a reasoning like mine. One day I DO want to have a child or two, but for the time being I'm still young (26) and I want to live MY life right now and not have to worry about someone elses life.

I grew up raising my little brother. I was 7 when he was born. Not to mention I currently have about 8 cousins that range in age from 16 to 2. So I've been around children all my life. But like I said, it's when the child has no manners that I will state out loud "I can't stand kids" (and yes a couple of my cousins are VERY ill mannered kids).......

I suppose in this day and age if parents were able to participate in their childs life a lot more like we did back in the 30's, 40's, and 50's then we wouldn't have so many ill mannered kids running around. Heck even back when *I* was young if I acted out in any way shape or form I'd have been smacked upside the head. The majority of parents out there have become TOO lenient and it annoys the HECK out of me. Kids have NO sense of authority anymore. (Even the Chicago Tribune just did an article about how college students have some of the worst manners in the last few years. So I'm not just picking on YOUNG kids, I'm talking about kids all the way up to the age of like 21).......
Old 09-08-2009, 12:30 PM
Location: St Thomas, US Virgin Islands
24,671 posts, read 55,660,331 times
Reputation: 26426
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I'm not making any judgments myself, but people like this are often portrayed as self-centered, impatient and not very warm. Of course hating any group for no good reason is probably not a good thing, but have you noticed this in general? I know some of the meanest people can still like babies or puppies or something, but I get the idea that some people who say they dislike children are rather serious, and have lost their innocence in a way. Of course some may just say they and dislike them on a very superficial level, but I also think they have forgotten the child within them, and maybe need to re-connect with that.
I've read the whole thread and am just popping in to register my (meagre?) two cents. As always I have a real problem with "hate" used in conjunction with "dislike" as they're very different reactions.

To echo what others have said in many different ways, I haven't raised biological children but do think I've done a pretty good job over the years of positively impacting children's minds at certain times. I don't dislike children but I do despise a system which either through parental neglect or basing education on the lowest common denominator produces children who are all about "me, me, me" with nary a thought about how their negative actions have negative consequences on both themselves and those with whom they live or socially interact with. Little brains are veritable sponges and can and do soak up equally both the good and the bad.

I was the last of three siblings to leave home, all of whom honestly couldn't wait to get out. When I visited my mother after a couple of months of moving to the Big City at the tender age of 16 to make a living on my own, my mother stood on the doorstep and quite nonchalantly said, "I'm so glad you finally left home. You know, I never much liked any of you when you were children." It was something I had always known, that we were all a cross she had to bear but at that very vulnerable time in my life it was, and remains, something which I've always hoped no child has to deal with.

To keep this all short and to end on a note of levity, when people call and ask if my restaurant is "child-friendly" I dutifully explain that although I don't have a menu for children there is plenty on the menu to satisfy them. I further add that I have to hand lots of duct tape, ropes and chains to control the little darlings if they pose a problem.
Old 09-08-2009, 02:16 PM
Location: Santa Barbara
1,474 posts, read 2,587,164 times
Reputation: 942
Originally Posted by Giesela View Post
Honestly I don't know that many women who never had kids. Even the ones who say no I won't, will cave at the end (but they still usually only adopt when they can't have any of their own). Is it love? Or afraid of being ostracized from the greater human experience?
Very thoughtful post. Made sense. I bolded the area because it is strange, I am childfree by choice and growing up, many of the women in my life were also childfree. Maybe they helped mold me into who I am today. I have two sisters and only one sister has a child (one daughter).

I won't say I hate kids (I don't know them ALL so how can I hate them?). I did hate one child. My cousin who was 5 years younger than me. He was your stereotypical entitled brat whose parents thought he was the greatest thing ever to grace this earth. I dislike being around them in big packs or around one who is screaming like a banshee. I can say the same thing for some adults. Some kids can be a delight to be around. It all boils down to the parenting as well as the environment (even the best behaved child can be a monster in the right/wrong environment).

I am always on my best behavior around anyone and very friendly. For some reason kids like me. I talk to them like shorter adults (but not about adult topics of course!).
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