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Old 05-31-2009, 03:48 PM
 
Location: Incognito
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I mean, when you already are set on your ways that define the person you actually are, can you change that and become a totally different person in order to make your SO happy?
Have any of you have modified the way you behave, the way you act or the way you talk or approach life?
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Old 05-31-2009, 03:59 PM
 
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Modified, definitely yes, or we would not learn and grow...

But change, to be essentially a person who comes from
a different perspective? No.
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Old 05-31-2009, 04:00 PM
 
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
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I did for a while...well maybe even a year or two....but eventually I was me and I am who I am..
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Old 05-31-2009, 04:44 PM
 
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I really think it takes something BIG to change someone permanently and by big, I mean something almost traumatic. People can change to accommodate other people for a short while, but I don't think it lasts. At least I've never seen it last. It takes a lot of willpower, motivation and determination to make it last forever.
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Old 05-31-2009, 04:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paws917 View Post
I really think it takes something BIG to change someone permanently and by big, I mean something almost traumatic. People can change to accommodate other people for a short while, but I don't think it lasts. At least I've never seen it last. It takes a lot of willpower, motivation and determination to make it last forever.

Yeah, I think we have to define "change"...
When I was younger I had a big temper, and while
I'm much better at holding it now, it is still a challenge
to do so, a conscious decision vs. a subconscious reaction.
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Old 05-31-2009, 04:55 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Cat View Post
I mean, when you already are set on your ways that define the person you actually are, can you change that and become a totally different person in order to make your SO happy?
Have any of you have modified the way you behave, the way you act or the way you talk or approach life?
I have at least four times. I was a "band kid" in school. Then I got into horses, showed world class, it was a life style. Then in my late 20's I went to the bar for my first time. The next few years was a party. Then I married for the first time. Worked my tail off, two and three jobs at a time. One day I decided I was sick of being poor. So, I did what I had to to change that. Many people wonder what will be next.
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
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There are some behaviors you can change, but you can't change who you are at the core. That's pretty much set by the time you are 5.

The whole point of having an SO you are committed to is you found someone who loves you and accepts you for who you are, warts and all.
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:36 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CESpeed View Post
There are some behaviors you can change, but you can't change who you are at the core. That's pretty much set by the time you are 5.

In general I think this to be true.

However, I've seen people accept Christ and seem to have a serious and long term change at the core of their being.
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:41 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs, AR
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I have to respectfully disagree. The people who have the most dramatic change when they accept Christ are ones who were actively at the time engaging in destructive behaviors and the "change" that is seen in them is dropping the destructive behaviors and reverting to the personalities set in childhood. If you ask the parents of those people whose lives are dramatically changed, those parents will say, "I'm so glad to have my baby back."
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Old 05-31-2009, 07:15 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CESpeed View Post
There are some behaviors you can change, but you can't change who you are at the core. That's pretty much set by the time you are 5.

The whole point of having an SO you are committed to is you found someone who loves you and accepts you for who you are, warts and all.


I agree with this post 100%
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