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Old 10-05-2009, 02:50 PM
 
Location: I'm around here someplace :)
3,633 posts, read 4,251,226 times
Reputation: 3980

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Quote:
Originally Posted by cricket_factor View Post
Aha, that's what I am, too!
cool!!
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Old 10-05-2009, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Downtown Austin
5,988 posts, read 14,908,292 times
Reputation: 4869
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tia 914 View Post
"opposites may attract, but sames endure"

not sure where I heard that, but I think it's accurate
I don't know. My wife and I have been married 18 years. We are very different in many ways. I often joke that if we were each looking for love today and both signed up at an online dating site, we would absolutely never be paired as candidates for one another. Yet our love endures, our parenting philosophies are 100% in sync. After all of these years of marriage, we never tire of each other's company and companionship or run out of things to talk about.

Yet in many superficial ways we are excruciatingly opposite. We have friends who have wondered out loud how we ended up together.

And I've known many "good match" couples (both runners, dog lovers, nerdy, etc.) who don't make it, despite seeming to belong together. So I'm not sure I'd agree with the "opposites attract, sames endure" rule of thumb.

I'd say that relationship endurance is more a product of both being willing to fight fair, knowing which battles to pick, being able let go of anger quickly, not hold grudges (what our counselor years ago called "gunny sacking"), being willing to say "I'm Sorry" (even when you were 100% right) and then shut up and never mention it again.

It's the ability to rebound without ongoing resentment from arguments and fights that determine endurance, not pure compatibility.

Finally, as a husband, I've never regretting letting my wife have her way on matters that are core to her true happiness. Mainly nesting issues related to house and home, schooling and kid rearing issues, and things that make her feel special and loved. And she does the same for me. I guess that's called compromise.

Anyway, I'm no expert for sure, but that's my take on it.

Steve
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Old 10-05-2009, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Philly
1,776 posts, read 3,542,139 times
Reputation: 821
Quote:
Originally Posted by austin-steve View Post
I'd say that relationship endurance is more a product of both being willing to fight fair, knowing which battles to pick, being able let go of anger quickly, not hold grudges (what our counselor years ago called "gunny sacking"), being willing to say "I'm Sorry" (even when you were 100% right) and then shut up and never mention it again.

It's the ability to rebound without ongoing resentment from arguments and fights that determine endurance, not pure compatibility.

Finally, as a husband, I've never regretting letting my wife have her way on matters that are core to her true happiness. Mainly nesting issues related to house and home, schooling and kid rearing issues, and things that make her feel special and loved. And she does the same for me. I guess that's called compromise.

Anyway, I'm no expert for sure, but that's my take on it.

Steve
Pretty much man. Rep for ya.
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Old 10-05-2009, 03:05 PM
 
Location: I'm around here someplace :)
3,633 posts, read 4,251,226 times
Reputation: 3980
Quote:
Originally Posted by austin-steve View Post
I don't know. My wife and I have been married 18 years. We are very different in many ways. I often joke that if we were each looking for love today and both signed up at an online dating site, we would absolutely never be paired as candidates for one another. Yet our love endures, our parenting philosophies are 100% in sync. After all of these years of marriage, we never tire of each other's company and companionship or run out of things to talk about.

Yet in many superficial ways we are excruciatingly opposite. We have friends who have wondered out loud how we ended up together.

And I've known many "good match" couples (both runners, dog lovers, nerdy, etc.) who don't make it, despite seeming to belong together. So I'm not sure I'd agree with the "opposites attract, sames endure" rule of thumb.

I'd say that relationship endurance is more a product of both being willing to fight fair, knowing which battles to pick, being able let go of anger quickly, not hold grudges (what our counselor years ago called "gunny sacking"), being willing to say "I'm Sorry" (even when you were 100% right) and then shut up and never mention it again.

It's the ability to rebound without ongoing resentment from arguments and fights that determine endurance, not pure compatibility.

Finally, as a husband, I've never regretting letting my wife have her way on matters that are core to her true happiness. Mainly nesting issues related to house and home, schooling and kid rearing issues, and things that make her feel special and loved. And she does the same for me. I guess that's called compromise.

Anyway, I'm no expert for sure, but that's my take on it.

Steve
While I see your points there, maybe you and she do have compatible personalities... and perhaps the people you mentioned who had "shared interests" didn't?
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Old 10-05-2009, 03:08 PM
 
8,468 posts, read 13,224,396 times
Reputation: 7511
Quote:
Originally Posted by IZthe411 View Post
As much as I am not the touchy feely affectionate emotionally ideal dude for my girl, and as much as I hate to have those discussions about me not doing it enough, I don't think I'd want some emotionless chick. As much as it annoys me, it's helping me to grow.
Being total opposites makes it a lot harder, but being exactly the same isn't good either. You want a partner where you have enough in common where you can form a deep bond, but enough difference that complement one another. I'm not a touchy-feely person either and if I was with someone who was the same way, it would make things pretty boring.
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Old 10-05-2009, 03:45 PM
 
28,906 posts, read 45,202,743 times
Reputation: 45815
I am an ENFP, the Champion (ENFP)

Like the other Idealists, Champions are rather rare, say two or three percent of the population, but even more than the others they consider intense emotional experiences as being vital to a full life. Champions have a wide range and variety of emotions, and a great passion for novelty. They see life as an exciting drama, pregnant with possibilities for both good and evil, and they want to experience all the meaningful events and fascinating people in the world. The most outgoing of the Idealists, Champions often can't wait to tell others of their extraordinary experiences. Champions can be tireless in talking with others, like fountains that bubble and splash, spilling over their own words to get it all out. And usually this is not simple storytelling; Champions often speak (or write) in the hope of revealing some truth about human experience, or of motivating others with their powerful convictions. Their strong drive to speak out on issues and events, along with their boundless enthusiasm and natural talent with language, makes them the most vivacious and inspiring of all the types.

Fiercely individualistic, Champions strive toward a kind of personal authenticity, and this intention always to be themselves is usually quite attractive to others. At the same time, Champions have outstanding intuitive powers and can tell what is going on inside of others, reading hidden emotions and giving special significance to words or actions. In fact, Champions are constantly scanning the social environment, and no intriguing character or silent motive is likely to escape their attention. Far more than the other Idealists, Champions are keen and probing observers of the people around them, and are capable of intense concentration on another individual. Their attention is rarely passive or casual. On the contrary, Champions tend to be extra sensitive and alert, always ready for emergencies, always on the lookout for what's possible.

Champions are good with people and usually have a wide range of personal relationships. They are warm and full of energy with their friends. They are likable and at ease with colleagues, and handle their employees or students with great skill. They are good in public and on the telephone, and are so spontaneous and dramatic that others love to be in their company. Champions are positive, exuberant people, and often their confidence in the goodness of life and of human nature makes good things happen.

Joan Baez, Phil Donahue, Paul Robeson, Bill Moyer, Elizibeth Cady Stanton, Joeseph Campbell, Edith Wharton, Sargent Shriver, Charles Dickens, and Upton Sinclair are examples of Idealist Champions
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Old 10-05-2009, 03:47 PM
 
Location: The Mango Tree
2,115 posts, read 4,388,904 times
Reputation: 2626
Like CPG above me and max's mama, I am an ENFP.

I've actually taken this test 3 or 4 times and have always received ENFP. My father is the one who introduced me to it when I was younger because he wanted to help me discover my personality type. Thank you, Dad haha.
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Old 10-05-2009, 03:54 PM
 
Location: Philly
1,776 posts, read 3,542,139 times
Reputation: 821
Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyCrane View Post
Being total opposites makes it a lot harder, but being exactly the same isn't good either. You want a partner where you have enough in common where you can form a deep bond, but enough difference that complement one another. I'm not a touchy-feely person either and if I was with someone who was the same way, it would make things pretty boring.
Agreed, but that's something that you can't tell off the cuff unless they are just that different! If the two are good, and willing to work, it can work.
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Old 10-05-2009, 04:36 PM
 
Location: Bradenton, Florida
27,236 posts, read 40,266,772 times
Reputation: 10915
I'm an ISTJ.

Even never having met you, I'd be willing to bet you're an ESFP.
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Old 10-05-2009, 05:03 PM
 
11,672 posts, read 13,873,542 times
Reputation: 19019
ISFJ Percentages:

Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging
89 12 12 44

We are lucky that Protectors make up as much as ten percent the population, because their primary interest is in the safety and security of those they care about - their family, their circle of friends, their students, their patients, their boss, their fellow-workers, or their employees. Protectors have an extraordinary sense of loyalty and responsibility in their makeup, and seem fulfilled in the degree they can shield others from the dirt and dangers of the world.


You are:
  • very expressed introvert
  • slightly expressed sensing personality
  • slightly expressed feeling personality
  • moderately expressed judging personality
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