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Im sorry for your pain, I just did my first post a few days ago because I had to put my Bullmastiff Boz to sleep. He had the same thing as Champ, but I didn't know until 2 days prior to having to put him to sleep. He quit eating and was coughing blood, breathing really hard...Anyway, when the vet put the saline then the stuff they use to put him down, IT DIDN'T WORK. Boz looked back at me (because I was behind him holding him)with that same surprise. (I didn't add this in my initial post because I didn't know if anyone would understand). He didn't even get tired, just looked around like "what was going on." The vet had to leave the room and get more astetic (whatever it is) and then after 3minutes came back and put it directly into his vein. Then he died. The part where he looked back at me I believe was confusion, and he seemed so alert. I know this doesn't help, because I don't know how to deal either right now, but I keep reading everyones comments and it has helped me to cope a bit, but I still have a long way to go. Happy times and sad times don't help, I guess it is just going to take time...And I am so sorry you had to go through that. But atleast you knew about the tumor so you were able to give him the love and attention before he left you and that is priceless.
I am new here. I came looking for comfort. I had to put my good, good dog, Champ to sleep yesterday. She started coughing about a month ago. The vet diagnosed a lung tumor. She was a Golden, Chow mix. Her temprament was all Golden - sweet and loving. She was very protective of me, always staying close when strangers were near. She was 12 years old. I could have taken her to Ames IA or Kansas City for chemo, but I chose not to, because you can't explain to a dog why they feel so bad. I told the vet I wanted to make her comfortable and give her good life quality and when we couldn't do that it would be time to let her go. Fri. night she vomitted and refused to eat, Sat she had diarrhea and vomitted 2X, then wanted to go outside and lie in the snow. She wouldn't get up. I had to pick her up, before she'd walk in the house. I took her to the vet. I knew it was time. The vet said so too.
Besides missing my sweet girl something else is really bothering me. When the vet put the med. in after the saline, our eyes met and for one instant she looked so surprised. Then she was gone. I feel as though I let her down in some way. I don't know what this feeling is. I know i did the right thing. I know I couldn't let my sorrow keep me from taking care of my baby. but why did she look surprised? And how do I deal with this feeling? She was such a good dog. She was always with me. Wherever I went, she'd come and then lay at my feet. Can someone help me?
Peaceful1
I'm so sorry. We went through this in January w/ my favorite cat ever.1
You will have a phantom dog for a while and miss her and you should and then then your beloved dog will become a warm memory. I promise. It takes a while but will get easier. I think I walked around crying off and on for about two weeks. I would go get cat food for my Darling Bailey and then remember he's no longer around, but it gets better. ....many hugs!
Many prayers
Treat me kindly, my beloved master for no heart in the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I lick your hand between blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ears.
When it is cold and wet, please take me inside, for I am now a domesticated animal, no longer used to bitter elements.
And I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth.
Though had you no home, I would rather follow you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in the warmest home in all the land, for you are my God, and I am your devoted worshiper.
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not reproach you were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.
Feed me clean food, that I may well to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready , willing, and able to protect you with my life should your life be in danger.
And, beloved master, should the Great Master see fit to deprive me of my health or sight, do not turn me away from you......rather hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest......and I will leave you knowing with my last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in your hands.
You did the right thing, the kind thing, for your dog, don't get hung up on guilt. Grieve and move on...You will see your dog again...
I am so sorry for your loss. We have had wonderful furry family members in our home over the years. Each time one crosses over, I say "No more" it hurts to bad to even think of getting another dog. The house is so empty, we find a rescue shelter and bring home a new friend to give them a loving forever home. we have two rescue dogs that track in dirt, shed all over the house and give us unconditional love. I hope you are able to open your heart to another dog. It will never take the place of your Champ but it will be a joy to watch it run and have another chance at life. Hugs, Grammy Linna
Peaceful1, I think feelings of guilt and doubt are very normal and as the days go by that'll make room for the knowledge that you did what was right for your dog, Champ. She would have ended up having no life quality and how sad is that? I let my cat go nearly two years ago and at first I had the same type feelings, we love them and hate to see them suffer, yet hate to let them go. When they're ill and can't have a good life, what's the point?
I'm sure all of us animal lovers understand how hard it is for you, but it'll get better and you'll have all those great memories. Do you have any pictures? There's a picture thread here somewhere and I'd love to see a photo if you feel up to it.
Maggiez,
thank you for such a generously kind answer. I do have a picture I would love to share in a day or 2. Thank you,
Peaceful1
To all the kind loving spirits who are so quick to hold out helping hands to me when I need help, thank you so much for helping me through this time. Your words have meant so much to me. I've cried while reading them and been comforted by the wisdom and love in them. Again, thank you.
Peaceful1
I had to put down one of my dogs a little over a year ago and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I understand why you feel this way; it's just hard to explain.
You did the best thing for her and even though she's not there in body she's there is spirit. She sounds like she was a great companion and as loyal as they come. It's always hard to do, but for her well being it was the best decision in the long run. I had to tell myself they're running free at the rainbow bridge and no longer in pain. They get to dow hat ever and eat whatever they want; it's what every dog wants. To live in a dog park the rest of their lives.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Merrit
Thank you, it helps to think of her happy.
Bridget
Im sorry for your pain, I just did my first post a few days ago because I had to put my Bullmastiff Boz to sleep. He had the same thing as Champ, but I didn't know until 2 days prior to having to put him to sleep. He quit eating and was coughing blood, breathing really hard...Anyway, when the vet put the saline then the stuff they use to put him down, IT DIDN'T WORK. Boz looked back at me (because I was behind him holding him)with that same surprise. (I didn't add this in my initial post because I didn't know if anyone would understand). He didn't even get tired, just looked around like "what was going on." The vet had to leave the room and get more astetic (whatever it is) and then after 3minutes came back and put it directly into his vein. Then he died. The part where he looked back at me I believe was confusion, and he seemed so alert. I know this doesn't help, because I don't know how to deal either right now, but I keep reading everyones comments and it has helped me to cope a bit, but I still have a long way to go. Happy times and sad times don't help, I guess it is just going to take time...And I am so sorry you had to go through that. But atleast you knew about the tumor so you were able to give him the love and attention before he left you and that is priceless.
I am so sorry about Boz. I can't imagine how awful that must have been. Thank you for taking time to share with me even though you are already hurting yourself. I hope we both find some peace.
Thank you,
Bridget
vet killed my cat while i held her.
i went nuts.
was not right for 2 years.
last of my family gone.
1997.
I cannt help but i can understand.
it gets better but it is short of
a trip to disneyland
The vet felt sure it was the right thing to do, I think you can rest easy as well.
I think you may be feeling the weight of the responsibility. The fact that we can actually do this for another being - release them from their pain - is a blessing, but it doesn't make it any easier to process.
Try not to dwell on that last moment - it was a transformative moment and the reality of the moment might not always be pretty.
Try instead to remember the good times.
That makes a lot of sense. I appreciate your help with this.
Peaceful1
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