So I feel guilty over the euthansia

[movin'on]

The Dr. told me his condition was very grave and very serious and he may not last through the night. So I made arrangements to put him to sleep the following day at 11:30. You cannot imagine how tough that morning was, feeding him cheese while his tail wagged.

I don't feel his spirit here. I had him put to sleep at home. It really wasn't peaceful. Now I am thinking I betrayed him, in spite of the fact I took him to three Vets in 24 hours and got a grim prognosis. He was feeling very bad. His platelet levels halved overnight. There wasn't the right kind of blood for a transfusion or several, and I'd already put him through three surgeries in March/April and he spent three weeks in the hospital. Perhaps I was too hasty. Perhaps I should have let him live longer. He was a fighter and yet I made the call to put the shot into his vein to stop his heart. At any rate, the pain is getting worse, not better.

[bande1102]

I had to put my cancer-ridden dog Maggie down. I knew it was the right decision for her. I took her to the vet's office (it was best for us) and she loved car rides. Even as sick as she was, she was still excited about the last car ride. Broke my heart. And when the vet was about to inject the second drug to stop her heart, it took everything in me not to yell at her stop and just wait 5 more minutes. Just 5 more minutes with her....But I didn't because I knew it wasn't fair to her.

I guess my point is that I understand what you're feeling. I didn't like ordering my beloved Maggie's death and prayed alot beforehand that I was making the right decision. But when I invited that beautiful creature into my home and family, I also accepted the awesome responsibility to put her needs ahead of my own--because she never would no matter the cost. Even until the very end, when she was in incredible pain, she still hung on, for her family. And in the end, one of the best ways that I could come up with to honor her LIFE was to allow her to pass painlessly into death. My final gift to her for a job well done.

I know that you loved your friend and I know that you did the right thing. I think it's natural to second-guess things. But I hope that you won't let the last few seconds of your friend's life redefine the life that you shared. One of the things that helped me tremendously is to make a little photo album of my favorite pictures of Maggie. I actually carry it with me and share them with friends. Talking about her life/her antics/her sense of humor help me be grateful for having had her. Because as hard as it was to loser her, it was all worth it and I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat. I hope someday you feel the same way. God bless.

[ShelbyGirl1]

I am so very sorry. But, given the circumstances, I feel, you did the right thing. Of course, that doesn't help the ache in your heart right now.
You washed his pain away...you were there for him every step of the way.
I feel we owe our furkids...in that, let them die free of pain. They can not make that decision on their own. So many people want to hang on to them. But, so often, it is for their own peace of mind. Not the animals. Please, take comfort in knowing he lived a full happy life and knew he was loved. You did all that you could. Sending some comforting cyber hugs.

[Sam I Am]

Movin', like all pain...it does get worse before it gets better...and as humans we are forever second guessing ourselves. Such a hard decision to make, but be at peace...you would not have wanted him to have to endure a lot of pain or a massive infection that could have taken him but left him gravely ill for a while.

Peace to you...light a candle, he will be with you...and one day the very good memories will outweigh the bad. I know you are beating yourself up, but please don't...he'd been through a lot already and I know it was difficult for both of you. I'm sure you wouldn't want that for him again. Sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing.

You are among friends.

[movin'on]

Originally Posted by bande1102

I had to put my cancer-ridden dog Maggie down. I knew it was the right decision for her. I took her to the vet's office (it was best for us) and she loved car rides. Even as sick as she was, she was still excited about the last car ride. Broke my heart. And when the vet was about to inject the second drug to stop her heart, it took everything in me not to yell at her stop and just wait 5 more minutes. Just 5 more minutes with her....But I didn't because I knew it wasn't fair to her.

I guess my point is that I understand what you're feeling. I didn't like ordering my beloved Maggie's death and prayed alot beforehand that I was making the right decision. But when I invited that beautiful creature into my home and family, I also accepted the awesome responsibility to put her needs ahead of my own--because she never would no matter the cost. Even until the very end, when she was in incredible pain, she still hung on, for her family. And in the end, one of the best ways that I could come up with to honor her LIFE was to allow her to pass painlessly into death. My final gift to her for a job well done.

I know that you loved your friend and I know that you did the right thing. I think it's natural to second-guess things. But I hope that you won't let the last few seconds of your friend's life redefine the life that you shared. One of the things that helped me tremendously is to make a little photo album of my favorite pictures of Maggie. I actually carry it with me and share them with friends. Talking about her life/her antics/her sense of humor help me be grateful for having had her. Because as hard as it was to loser her, it was all worth it and I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat. I hope someday you feel the same way. God bless.

Thank you. Your post just makes me cry. I am sorry for the loss of Maggie. I think my little dog hung on through that night too. I took him for a car ride to the store at 8:30 as I had to get something and did not want to leave him alone. He liked car rides too. Those final hours were just painful, knowing that the Vet was going to show up at 11:30 - knowing that I'd have to be ready to say good-bye - I kept wanting to hold him but his cat was his buddy and he had no idea he'd be saying good-bye to me too. God, I miss him so. I am just starting to lose it here. It's been two and a half weeks and this is the hardest thing in my life I think. I don't know. When I lost my Tiffany it was under different circumstances and absolutely tragic, but it was Teddy who got me through that. At any rate, thank you for your lovely post. God bless you too.

[movin'on]

Originally Posted by ShelbyGirl1

I am so very sorry. But, given the circumstances, I feel, you did the right thing. Of course, that doesn't help the ache in your heart right now.
You washed his pain away...you were there for him every step of the way.
I feel we owe our furkids...in that, let them die free of pain. They can not make that decision on their own. So many people want to hang on to them. But, so often, it is for their own peace of mind. Not the animals. Please, take comfort in knowing he lived a full happy life and knew he was loved. You did all that you could. Sending some comforting cyber hugs.

Yes, at the end I did do all I could, but I wonder if I could have done better in his life. I could have taken him to the Vet more. There are a lot of things I maybe could have done. At any rate, no one could have loved him more than me. He was only eight and a half. Way too young to die for a little dog. I feel like I failed him...

[movin'on]

Originally Posted by Sam I Am

Movin', like all pain...it does get worse before it gets better...and as humans we are forever second guessing ourselves. Such a hard decision to make, but be at peace...you would not have wanted him to have to endure a lot of pain or a massive infection that could have taken him but left him gravely ill for a while.

Peace to you...light a candle, he will be with you...and one day the very good memories will outweigh the bad. I know you are beating yourself up, but please don't...he'd been through a lot already and I know it was difficult for both of you. I'm sure you wouldn't want that for him again. Sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing.

You are among friends.

Thank you so much, Sam I Am. There is a worldwide candle vigil for pets each Monday night, and I light two flames - one for Teddy and one for Tiffany. It's such that everyone over the globe is doing the same thing at the same time. I really appreciate your post.

[scorp200]

I think you did the right thing. I just put my dog down today and she was happy up until the end too...but was in amazing pain, and there was only more to come. I knew that from last night's emergency vet visit forward I was keeping her alive for me. You let your dog go with dignity, which is wonderful. My condolences...wish our furkids could have stayed forever...

[scorp200]

I just saw this quote on another pet loss forum and it's really resonating with me today. Maybe it will with you, too:

"I am sending you on a journey to a land free from pain..not because I didn't love you but because I loved you too much to force you to stay."

[Kasey77]

Originally Posted by movin'on

The Dr. told me his condition was very grave and very serious and he may not last through the night. So I made arrangements to put him to sleep the following day at 11:30. You cannot imagine how tough that morning was, feeding him cheese while his tail wagged.

I don't feel his spirit here. I had him put to sleep at home. It really wasn't peaceful. Now I am thinking I betrayed him, in spite of the fact I took him to three Vets in 24 hours and got a grim prognosis. He was feeling very bad. His platelet levels halved overnight. There wasn't the right kind of blood for a transfusion or several, and I'd already put him through three surgeries in March/April and he spent three weeks in the hospital. Perhaps I was too hasty. Perhaps I should have let him live longer. He was a fighter and yet I made the call to put the shot into his vein to stop his heart. At any rate, the pain is getting worse, not better.

Movin...I thought the same thing and I did not put my little dog down. She was still eating, going to the bathroom and kind of was here mentally. I thought I was being cruel to put her down. Well, I have to say, I would NEVE EVER do that again. This little dog had a hard death. I got her in to the vets, but she went through hell the last 48 hours. I was cruel and selfish. I wanted her so bad, that now I look back, I did not take good care of her. For me, Loving them is letting them NOT suffer. I learned at my little dog's expense. I have 2 other yorkies. The first sign that it is terminal and they might suffer, I am putting them down. Believe me, this goes against everything I had in me about animals, their life and taking life. I was not responsible before, this will NEVER be again.