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Old 01-02-2009, 07:18 PM
 
Location: So. California
514 posts, read 779,271 times
Reputation: 782

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The Sunday after Thanksgiving I lost my treasure, my little four legged soul-mate Nugget. She was only 5, a chi/minpin mix. We were out of town staying at my late parents home that we care for. She had a bit of a stomach problem which wasn't unusual for her as she ate everything. But it got bad Sunday afternoon. We finally found an emergency clinic and that night rushed her there. We had to wait a long time, as she was getting lethargic. To shorten the story, we finally saw a vet who said she was going into shock and they would try to save her. I called at 2am and they said her temp had gone back up so it looked a little better. At 3am they called to say she had died. I haven't stopped crying. I feel as if I let her down. I should have taken her to the vet sooner. My husband said we had no way of knowing it was more serious than her usual upset stomach which always went away on its own. I still feel overwhelmed by guilt. Out of all the dogs I've had, and I still have 2, she was my special one. Everything reminds me of her and I just can't let go. I keep feeling like I should wake up and she'll be back. I've lost dogs before, but this hurts so bad.
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Old 01-03-2009, 04:05 AM
 
Location: Historic Springfield
549 posts, read 1,937,183 times
Reputation: 380
I'm so sorry for your loss and hope that you'll find comfort in knowing that your little one is now in a wondrous place where she's forever young, happy and healthy.

What did they say was wrong with her? I don't know how long of a time frame you're talking about between when she became ill and when you got her to the vet....it's not clear. But don't beat yourself up over it, as it's so easy to find reason to feel guilty, after something happens, we always want to beat ourselves up with...could've, should've done this differently, or taken action sooner. It's hard to tell with our 4 legged friends what's serious and needs immediate attention and/or if it's something to keep a watch on...it's not like they can tell us....so don't be consumed with the guilt. You did take her when it clearly appeared serious...and for whatever reason, it was time for her to go. Like I said, allow yourself comfort in knowing you loved her, cared for her and that she's okay.
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Old 01-03-2009, 06:45 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
2,806 posts, read 6,522,350 times
Reputation: 3275
I am so sorry for your loss! Things can turn serious quickly, and it is very difficult to know when the usual minor issues become something more...I have chi mixes, and they try to eat EVERYTHING, so I know exactly where you are coming from and why you didnt think it was cause for alarm. If I took them to the vet every time they ate something nasty and had an upset tummy, I would be penniless! I know its hard, but please dont beat yourself up...you had no way of knowing she was that bad until she showed you, (a similar thing happened to me with a dear, wonderful cat last September, he didnt show any signs of being in a bad way until it was too late...it was one of the hardest things I ever went through.) My heart goes out to you, please know you are not alone in these feelings!
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Old 01-03-2009, 06:52 PM
 
Location: So. California
514 posts, read 779,271 times
Reputation: 782
Thanks for your kind words. I've had pets all my life, and have lost them to old age mostly. This is the first one that has literally ripped me to shreds. I don't want to believe she's gone.
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Old 01-04-2009, 12:11 AM
 
Location: Northern Nevada
8,545 posts, read 9,328,953 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3chidogs View Post
Thanks for your kind words. I've had pets all my life, and have lost them to old age mostly. This is the first one that has literally ripped me to shreds. I don't want to believe she's gone.
I feel your pain..I think it's only natural for us for feel guilty, or maybe like we could have done more. it's not like they can talk to us. Please tell yourself you did the absolute best you could, you got her to the emergency as soon as you could...We are only human...I have been through this 4 times in the last 6 years, old age, but symptoms that came on very quickly..nothing we could do...Doesn't make it easier but we always do ask ourselfs what could we have done better. the answer is nothing.

Hang in there, remember the good times and remember how much she knew YOU loved her. nothing better than that my friend...God Bless..
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Old 01-04-2009, 06:04 PM
bjh
 
Location: Memphis - home of the king
30,744 posts, read 23,784,890 times
Reputation: 122460
It's normal to feel guilty and wonder what we could have done differently when we lose a pet. I tend to do this everytime, even when a pet dies of old age. I know other people often feel the same way.

I think it is because we are more directly responsible for our pets than we are other humans. When a human family member is ill or injured we entrust their care to the professionals and generally accept that there is little we can do, our own knowledge of medical needs being so limited.

But when a pet is sick we can be slower to take them to their doctor because for one thing they can't tell us, "This is worse than usual. Take me in."

I've lost a pet unexpectedly and I think it is more painful than when they die of old age. Know that your feelings are normal. Just learn what you can from this for the future care of your current and later pets.

As the British say about the inevitable, unplanned, and sometimes unfortunate realities of life, "These things happen." YOu obviously did everything you could with the knowledge you had at the time. That is all that can be asked of anyone. Your feelings of grief and self-blame are proof that you were not lacking in concern or love for your pet. Take care and don't be too hard on yourself.

Thank you for giving your pets a beautiful and joyous life.
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Old 01-05-2009, 10:14 AM
 
Location: USA
1,107 posts, read 2,592,309 times
Reputation: 948
My sympathies to you. I know how it feels to have a broken heart over the loss of a pet. Don't allow yourself to feel guilty, it's so clear that you loved her and gave her a good life.
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Old 01-10-2009, 10:41 AM
 
5,244 posts, read 4,292,006 times
Reputation: 1840
Quote:
Originally Posted by 3chidogs View Post
Thanks for your kind words. I've had pets all my life, and have lost them to old age mostly. This is the first one that has literally ripped me to shreds. I don't want to believe she's gone.
I think it would be soooo hard because it was so sudden. With older doggies you almost prepare yourself for the "day" that it will happen. Don't feel guilty, there is no way you could have known that it was more serious. Be thankful for the time you had with her...I know easier said than done, I too am missing my little one and everything reminds me of him. I cry in the shower.
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Old 01-11-2009, 07:19 AM
 
4,247 posts, read 9,369,332 times
Reputation: 1461
Quote:
Originally Posted by 3chidogs View Post
The Sunday after Thanksgiving I lost my treasure, my little four legged soul-mate Nugget. She was only 5, a chi/minpin mix. We were out of town staying at my late parents home that we care for. She had a bit of a stomach problem which wasn't unusual for her as she ate everything. But it got bad Sunday afternoon. We finally found an emergency clinic and that night rushed her there. We had to wait a long time, as she was getting lethargic. To shorten the story, we finally saw a vet who said she was going into shock and they would try to save her. I called at 2am and they said her temp had gone back up so it looked a little better. At 3am they called to say she had died. I haven't stopped crying. I feel as if I let her down. I should have taken her to the vet sooner. My husband said we had no way of knowing it was more serious than her usual upset stomach which always went away on its own. I still feel overwhelmed by guilt. Out of all the dogs I've had, and I still have 2, she was my special one. Everything reminds me of her and I just can't let go. I keep feeling like I should wake up and she'll be back. I've lost dogs before, but this hurts so bad.
Awww, I am so sorry. I understand your feeling like maybe you could have brought her in sooner, but her stomach upsets were frequent, so how could you have possibly known it was serious? I can appreciate what you are going through, as I lost my Teddy quite quickly last July. I have a cat and remember just wishing it would have been the cat, not Teddy, as the bond we had was incredible and the cat, while nice enough - well, we just don't have the bond Teddy and I did. Hang in there. Time will make things a bit easier. Hugs.
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Old 01-11-2009, 03:24 PM
 
Location: So. California
514 posts, read 779,271 times
Reputation: 782
Thank you all. I've had another bad time, as we had to go back to the place where she became sick. My husband got impatient with me because I was upset and angry again. And so I've been crying ever since. I found her license papers when we got home and now I'm just in agony. She could make me happy, make me laugh. Now that she's gone, nothing makes me smile anymore. I wasn't ready to lose her at 5, and I just can't handle it. Sounds strange I'm sure, but she was the one who loved me the most, more than anyone else and I feel totally alone now. I miss her, oh how I miss her. It isn't fair.
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