Got an offer (Raleigh, Wilmington: landscaping, schools, college)

[DynaMow]

I got a job offer today from a business peer. He operates in The Triangle Area (RTP) .

Well here is my question. I am married, 46 years old, with a boy 10, and a girl 6. I live in NE Ohio, have all my life. Things are not going well here. A lot of closings and not much new opportunity. I own my own Lawn & Landscaping Company, but things are not as good as I want. Well he offers me a position in management, good salary and perks.

I am afraid to make the move. The only thing that I can think of that would suck is moving away from parents and brothers, nieces, nephews, cousins, etc....

I know my deciding factor has to be what is best for my children. I think that a move to Raleigh would be positive in many ways.

Why am I so scared?

[wordzgirl]

Because it's scary leaving everything you know. I'm in somewhat of the same situation, although all my family have all relocated south. My parents finally moved five years ago, and since then relocation has been in the back of my mind. I've lived here 37 years, and my kids were born here, I have wonderful friends who have become my family, and I know the city like the back of my hand.

However, my husband will probably never get a teaching job here. I've applied for a job in SC and his prospects of getting job there are sooooo much better than they are here. I think probably what makes people scared (myself included) is the fear of the unknown. I too have two children, and I know they'll be sad to leave here, but we'll all be together when we go. Family is the most important thing, and I know that it will be hard to leave your extended family, but you've got your husband and kids with you. You're probably also wondering that if you move, you might look back and think you made a huge mistake; but somehow, I don't think either one of us will do that.

Sometimes you've just got to follow your heart and take a great big leap of faith. I wish you lots of luck and best wishes in what you decide

[mcfamilyof4]

that is hard. We just recently moved here to be nearer to MY family but left all of my husbands family back in the midwest (cousins and grandma/grandpa). It has not been that hard, we have some family here and lots of cousins on my side to keep my little ones happy. You can't underestimate the importance of having family around, but other things are just as important....like stability of job and friends and great schools and other opportunities for your children when they grow up.

You would love it here I bet. Good luck with your decision.

[DebbieF]

What is happening to both of you, happened to me 25 years ago. I am originally from CT. where my family still all resides. IBM wanted to move us here on a temporary assignment. Even the thought of being away from everyone for only 1 year scared me, and it is the unknown. My children were 2 and 4 at the time, and I thought they needed their grandparents and cousins, aunts and uncles, but we survived. A temporary assignment turned into 25 years for me and I LOVE it here, and would never move north again, and my family is still all there. It did take me 2 years to finally get over the crying when it was someones birthday or a holiday I didn't go up for. Even on Sundays my family always gets together to eat, and I wasn't there. Honestly I still think about it at times, but would I move back....no. My children love it here and I'm glad I brought them to NC to raise them. It is a great place,and the even attended college in the state. One at NC State and one at UNC Wilmington. You will all be fine, if your anything like me, and I am a big family person.

[findingmesomeday]

GO! We stayed in New England following my husband's job loss thinking month-by-month and year-by-year that things would get better. When I look back on the past 5 years, I realize if we had taken action sooner, we would not be in the financial mess we're in today, having lost just about everything we had.

[Erin1264]

Just for comparison, and because it sounds like you have your doubts, I'd suggest posting this in the Ohio forum as well.

When you post in the Triangle forum, you are going to hear from people who live here, they love it, and you'll get a very rosy perspective. If you want encouragement, then you'll definitely get it. If you want to hear both sides of the issue, the Ohio forum might provide that.

[DebbieF]

Erin that is an awesome idea. I do myself go back to the CT. forum once in awhile.

[needhalc]

We have 4 neighbors from Ohio, and the great thing is that its a days drive back to visit their family, so visits can be fairly often. Thats not so bad...for us, its a days flight back to CA : (

Sounds like a wonderful opportunity for your family.

[Mikeheel]

One of my paralegals is from Ohio. He loves it here, but says it does get a lot hotter than he was used to. He's been in NC for at least 10 years, though.

What I have often seen is that 1 person (or family) moves here, raves about it to their relatives, and within a couple of years most of the relatives move here, too.

Our economy is strong. The climate is good. It's a very good environment for kids and families, especially.

However, you have to make the decision that will be best for your situation. I personally would have a VERY difficult time moving away from my family b/c of how involved they are in our lives. We are very close, and I would not give that up for a better job or location. .... Unless I could get them to go with me, of course.

Mike

[Nomad Relo]

JUMP! I moved down here from OH a year ago and it was the best decision I've made. Trust me, everything here is not perfect (higher housing costs, more sprawl, higher traffic that where I lived), but I do not miss OH...certainly not the snow! When I visit OH, I can just feel and SEE how depressed the economy is there. It is a compeletly different feelin g here...there is a buzz of excitement and growth! I am in a bit of a different situation, being single without kids, but you cannot beat the quality of life here! Good luck with your decison.