Relocating with kids - where are the best schools for my gifted 2nd grader and K-gartner? (Durham: transplants, house)

[leighbhe]

I have found this post so interesting, thanks to all who has contributed. I grew up in chapel hill, out of the chccs district though, but ended up going to a private school (carolina friends school because my parents taught there). I went to friends until high school, then I switched to chapel hill high and paid a small stipend in order to attend. Friends school is definitely individually based, teaches to the child, etc. I loved it, I loved school, and felt when I left that I had an excellent foundation for understanding my strengths, the world around me, etc.

On the flip side, my husband went to rural public schools in the eastern part of the state, none had a very good reputation, but he excelled. He didn't have parental support at home, yet he excelled. He ended up going to nc state and received a degree in electrical engineering.

So, the question I think of is, does it all matter that much? My daughter is in public school now, in wake county, and there are things about her school that make me miss friends school, but I know that I cannot afford to send her there! Although I think it is important for parents to be involved, I also think we as parents can go to an extreme. Yes, I want the best for my child, but there are things that I cannot control nor do I want to!

Anyhow, it is a confusing situation, and everyone should do what works for them.

Leigh

[tndshaver]

Originally Posted by jeannie216

Hi there,

I'm sure this must be extremely frustrating for you...and for most parents, as myself, not in your shoes, it is probably just innocent ignorance, so to speak. I really don't know what your options are, although you might just have to handle it "out of the classroom" maybe someone to work with them at home? I'm sure that would be very expensive though. Maybe if I can give you another parent's perspective, you might be more compassionate to those that are in different situations, not necessarily your's in particular, but again want the best for their child. How about the child that doesn't quite rate "gifted" but with that extra special touch, very well could? How about the boy that tests far above his grade level in Math, but is only slightly above in other subjects so he only mainstreams with the rest of the class? How about the kid who is so gifted athletically, but isn't going to get that extra treatment because it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the kids? The 1st grade girl reading at a 5th grade level, but isn't tested "gifted", only extremely advanced? I think all of us as parents can become frustrated with the school system, feeling that our child is not getting the reinforcement that he or she needs and with the proper attention, could be rated gifted or highly academically. Not to forget the "average" kid that with just a little reinforcement, could test advanced? The child that is slightly behind but with that special touch, could mainstream with the rest? Every situation, as yours is unique, I believe, and that is when I think as parents, instead of sitting back and complaining that the school system is not doing what they are suppose to do, have to come in and do it themselves. My son was in the gifted and talented 2 years ago, then, for whatever reason, it was only the advanced L.E.A.P program. I really don't have the answers, just some personal thoughts. Sincere wishes to you and your family, and best of luck to you. Jeannie

Jeannie...I totally understand where you are coming from too. And, yes, the compassion in our school systems should blanket all of our children, not just those with special needs. The group of mainstream kids is so large (90%), that most of their needs are fulfilled with mainstream curriculum. (exceptions, of course exist)

There seems to be a misunderstanding sometimes as to exactly what "gifted" means. A child cannot, no matter how much special attention they are given, or studying they do, learn to be gifted. Like the child who is gifted athletically, it's something they are born with. Many, many children are academically bright, advanced in certain subjects, and are high achievers (earning mostly A's). These kids are still different from "gifted" kids, who have a completely different way of learning, and test above the 99% on cognitive tests, which test their ablility to learn - not how far above grade level they do math and reading. They benefit most by being with kids who are like them, compressed curriculums, and learning from a teacher specialized in gifted education who knows how these kids think and learn.

My son was enrolled in a 4 week course on sea studies through the UC Berkeley (part of the "extras" we continually do in addition to regular school and YES it's very expensive!) His class contained 19 other gifted kids who came from as far as Singapore and Washington DC. They were instructed by a "gifted" teacher as well. We've never seen him so happy! I sat in on the class to observe and was astounded at the level of learning that took place. The teacher spoke as if she were lecturing to a group of adults, moved forward at such a quick pace and taught approx. 10 weeks of material during this time. They also did craft projects, field trips to the aquarium, etc. This is when we really started thinking that perhaps other schools existed in the country that could provide this kind of education for him all the time, because the thought of him returning to his regular class at the end of this month gave us a pit in our stomachs.

Sorry for the rambling. It's so hard to express how truly different these kids are and how they all (not just my son) need help here.

Many people tell us to homeschool...this isn't an option for him - he's uncharacteristically social (many of the gifted kids are introverts), and thrives on peer contact. We just need to find the right fit and are looking in the Raleigh area for it.

[jeannie216]

Originally Posted by tndshaver

Jeannie...I totally understand where you are coming from too. And, yes, the compassion in our school systems should blanket all of our children, not just those with special needs. The group of mainstream kids is so large (90%), that most of their needs are fulfilled with mainstream curriculum. (exceptions, of course exist)

There seems to be a misunderstanding sometimes as to exactly what "gifted" means. A child cannot, no matter how much special attention they are given, or studying they do, learn to be gifted. Like the child who is gifted athletically, it's something they are born with. Many, many children are academically bright, advanced in certain subjects, and are high achievers (earning mostly A's). These kids are still different from "gifted" kids, who have a completely different way of learning, and test above the 99% on cognitive tests, which test their ablility to learn - not how far above grade level they do math and reading. They benefit most by being with kids who are like them, compressed curriculums, and learning from a teacher specialized in gifted education who knows how these kids think and learn.

My son was enrolled in a 4 week course on sea studies through the UC Berkeley (part of the "extras" we continually do in addition to regular school and YES it's very expensive!) His class contained 19 other gifted kids who came from as far as Singapore and Washington DC. They were instructed by a "gifted" teacher as well. We've never seen him so happy! I sat in on the class to observe and was astounded at the level of learning that took place. The teacher spoke as if she were lecturing to a group of adults, moved forward at such a quick pace and taught approx. 10 weeks of material during this time. They also did craft projects, field trips to the aquarium, etc. This is when we really started thinking that perhaps other schools existed in the country that could provide this kind of education for him all the time, because the thought of him returning to his regular class at the end of this month gave us a pit in our stomachs.

Sorry for the rambling. It's so hard to express how truly different these kids are and how they all (not just my son) need help here.

Many people tell us to homeschool...this isn't an option for him - he's uncharacteristically social (many of the gifted kids are introverts), and thrives on peer contact. We just need to find the right fit and are looking in the Raleigh area for it.

You are not rambling, and thank you for sharing....gives me a little more of an understanding where you are coming from. I hope things work out for you and your boys.... Jeannie

[Hope Valley]

I can give a shout out for Camelot Academy in Durham. The approach is called "mastery learning" which allows kids to achieve at their own pace (some faster, some slower). The idea is that they "master" each section curriculum before moving ahead to the next thing. The school is under 100 kids in small classes so it's impossible to get lost like you can in bigger schools.

Check it out because I know they have some new teachers in the Elementary grades.

-Matthew

[tndshaver]

Thanks Matthew...that's the second, or third time I've heard about Camelot Academy. I do like the concept...it's a private school, right? We'd love to not to have to pay for education prior to college if we can help it. Looks like so many good public options exist in the Raleigh area.

Matter of fact - can anyone tell me anything about the Chapel Hill- Carrboro school district's gifted education programs? I stumbled upon the district's website and their 100+ page directive on gifted education and was absolutely astounded as to how comprehensive it is and how many options are available at all levels of giftedness. Has anyone out there actually experienced the programs first-hand? Looking at the programs on paper, they are amazing...practice is another thing and I'm hoping what you see is what you get. At our school, the administration tells you one thing and what your kids actually get is completely different...no accountability whatsoever.

Thanks for any help!

[alice_61]

A good way to get parents' take on gifted education in Chapel Hill is in the PAGE forum, PAGE-CHCCS : PAGE-CHCCS.

[tndshaver]

Hi Alice...coincidentally, I found that parent group on-line yesterday and joined their Yahoo group. I think they will be a great resource too.

[alice_61]

I'm glad you found the PAGE forum. There are a lot of back messages to read and folks will often respond fairly quickly to questions or events.

[welovedurham]

Does anyone know about the future of the Durham PAGE group? It's defunct? Plans for regrouping?

[lamishra]

Hi all, Wake has a PAGE group as well
here's the link: Wake County PAGE :: Partners for the Advancement of Gifted Education