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Thanks...can't wait to get back up there and make a final choice. One last question... I loved the Apex area on the Cary border (Shepherd's Vineyard, Haddon Hall (a little too "subdivisionish for us", and a couple other ones I can't recall at this time)...but I've read on here "Cary isn't as scary as Apex", "....no crime like there is in Apex". "sketchy Apex" etc. What's with that? I looked up the crime index and it didn't seem high at all? What are people considering bad?
One last question... I loved the Apex area on the Cary border (Shepherd's Vineyard, Haddon Hall (a little too "subdivisionish for us", and a couple other ones I can't recall at this time)...but I've read on here "Cary isn't as scary as Apex", "....no crime like there is in Apex". "sketchy Apex" etc. What's with that? I looked up the crime index and it didn't seem high at all? What are people considering bad?
Wow. I don't know who wrote the posts you're referring to describing "scary as Apex" or "sketchy Apex" or that kind of thing, but I'm pretty sure that either they were joking or you misunderstood them. Apex may be the least sketchy, least crime-y municipality in the Triangle area. Obviously, crime can and does happen literally everywhere, even in the safest communities. But there's no place around here that's any safer than Apex.
BTW, FWIW, of your four finalists for your new home town, I would personally rank them in the following order, in terms of accessibility to attractions, comfortable and pleasant living conditions, and long-range value:
Hope Valley Area of Durham
North Raleigh
Cary
Wake Forest
Again, that's just my personal opinion, but you have to make your own decision about what's best for you. And actually, all four are terrific communities, and I think you'd be happy with any of them and can't really go wrong with any of them. Best of luck!
Wow. I don't know who wrote the posts you're referring to describing "scary as Apex" or "sketchy Apex" or that kind of thing, but I'm pretty sure that either they were joking or you misunderstood them. Apex may be the least sketchy, least crime-y municipality in the Triangle area. Obviously, crime can and does happen literally everywhere, even in the safest communities. But there's no place around here that's any safer than Apex.
BTW, FWIW, of your four finalists for your new home town, I would personally rank them in the following order, in terms of accessibility to attractions, comfortable and pleasant living conditions, and long-range value:
Hope Valley Area of Durham
North Raleigh
Cary
Wake Forest
Again, that's just my personal opinion, but you have to make your own decision about what's best for you. And actually, all four are terrific communities, and I think you'd be happy with any of them and can't really go wrong with any of them. Best of luck!
I really don't think they were joking. They were giving crime stats to someone bashing Durham, and then comparing all the areas around Raleigh. They must have had a bad run in with a towny or something. They mentioned "areas" of Apex. I am certainly no stranger to places having crime pockets, and out of all our choices, I'm not worried about any of them. We have common sense, and know where to not go, and when to not go. Glad to hear that there wasn't something I missed when we visited Apex. We also didn't find the Cary traffic bad (we were there on a weekend though), and really found all the areas in the entire Triangle region to be fabulous. Aside from needing to make friends (always more difficult the older you are), and having no deep family roots there...we couldn't be more excited about setting up our own roots for our family, and having a great time checking out all the areas we may not have chosen for our home. Thanks for the info. I love the Durham area, but fear the taxes are a little insane for us. Giving up no state income tax, cheap homes, no car tax, no HUT etc we need to be sure that the taxes don't put us in a pinch. We've seen some great homes in the Durham area, but then the taxes are nearly 4500-5000 per year. Yikes. That's like Ohio. (mind you, these are on 250-300K homes. In the areas we like in Raleigh, the taxes are closer to 2000-3000. Since taxes never go away, or down...I would like that number to be lower. We'll check though. I did find it interesting that in NC they adjust taxes every 8 years. Here, you are stuck with whatever you buy the house for. Good if you buy low, but bad if someone owned the house for 30 years. Also, the city services stink here because they've taken such a beating in lost tax revenue due to all the foreclosures and short sales. So, I guess "you get what you pay for"...and we're excited our money might get us "more" once we arrive there. Thanks again!
I really don't think they were joking. They were giving crime stats to someone bashing Durham, and then comparing all the areas around Raleigh. They must have had a bad run in with a towny or something. They mentioned "areas" of Apex. I am certainly no stranger to places having crime pockets, and out of all our choices, I'm not worried about any of them. We have common sense, and know where to not go, and when to not go. Glad to hear that there wasn't something I missed when we visited Apex. We also didn't find the Cary traffic bad (we were there on a weekend though), and really found all the areas in the entire Triangle region to be fabulous. Aside from needing to make friends (always more difficult the older you are), and having no deep family roots there...we couldn't be more excited about setting up our own roots for our family, and having a great time checking out all the areas we may not have chosen for our home.
Yeah, I guess that may be true, although to be honest, Apex really doesn't even have any particular "crime pockets" the way many towns do, including most other towns in the Triangle and around the country. There are a couple of trailer parks on the outskirts of Apex that are fairly low-income, but actually they're not nearly as bad as many other trailer parks that you see in other places, and they're very small and not really in the town of Apex anyway. There is a small historically African-American neighborhood in the southwest corner of the old part of Apex, and there is of course an unfortunate tendency on the part of some white people to construe any place with a high concentration of black residents as "unsafe." That's not fair or accurate in general, and it's certainly not true of Apex's old black neighborhood, which is very small, very quiet, and definitely not a "crime pocket." The bottom line is that while no place is totally free of crime or immune from the potential for crime, Apex is a perfectly safe place, and as safe as anywhere in the region. And I don't think there's even any part of Apex that you would need to "know where to not go." There is literally nowhere in Apex where I would hesitate to live for safety concerns, or where I would feel unsafe walking down the street even late at night. If you chose to live there, you'd be fine.
By the way, you mentioned that making friends is "always more difficult the older you are." Do you really find that to be true? If so, do you know why that is? I haven't noticed that, but I also haven't really thought about it or looked for that pattern. (Maybe I just haven't gotten old enough yet). I don't know why that would be true, though. I guess perhaps there is sort of a tendency for people to get more set in their ways as they get older, which can make it harder to open oneself to new experiences, including friendship relationships with new people. But that's hardly a universal tendency, and it seems like a tendency that's pretty easy to overcome with some willpower and self-management. Have you had a different experience?
There's a couple of neighborhoods that were built in Apex in the late-90s, early 2000s that are dumpy looking. Obviously have been hit hard by a combination of cheap construction, high foreclosure rates, and many properties being turned into rentals over the years. This of course has nothing to do with crime but certainly neighborhoods that look like that don't give off warm fuzzy vibes. When we looked at some houses in Apex all but one of them ended up being in these sorts of neighborhoods which surprised us because we had no idea before going down there to look. That's the only thing I can really think of that people might be talking about.
Yeah, I guess that may be true, although to be honest, Apex really doesn't even have any particular "crime pockets" the way many towns do, including most other towns in the Triangle and around the country. There are a couple of trailer parks on the outskirts of Apex that are fairly low-income, but actually they're not nearly as bad as many other trailer parks that you see in other places, and they're very small and not really in the town of Apex anyway. There is a small historically African-American neighborhood in the southwest corner of the old part of Apex, and there is of course an unfortunate tendency on the part of some white people to construe any place with a high concentration of black residents as "unsafe." That's not fair or accurate in general, and it's certainly not true of Apex's old black neighborhood, which is very small, very quiet, and definitely not a "crime pocket." The bottom line is that while no place is totally free of crime or immune from the potential for crime, Apex is a perfectly safe place, and as safe as anywhere in the region. And I don't think there's even any part of Apex that you would need to "know where to not go." There is literally nowhere in Apex where I would hesitate to live for safety concerns, or where I would feel unsafe walking down the street even late at night. If you chose to live there, you'd be fine.
By the way, you mentioned that making friends is "always more difficult the older you are." Do you really find that to be true? If so, do you know why that is? I haven't noticed that, but I also haven't really thought about it or looked for that pattern. (Maybe I just haven't gotten old enough yet). I don't know why that would be true, though. I guess perhaps there is sort of a tendency for people to get more set in their ways as they get older, which can make it harder to open oneself to new experiences, including friendship relationships with new people. But that's hardly a universal tendency, and it seems like a tendency that's pretty easy to overcome with some willpower and self-management. Have you had a different experience?
Anyhow, good luck!
Thanks TomPope...
I do find it to be "somewhat" true regarding friends. I guess being a female, I've noticed that many females already have their "friends", and if you move to a place where there appear to be a lot of locals, they've grown up together, and just don't have the time to try to acclimate new friends to the group. However, I'm not saying they are unfriendly, or anything like that. I guess I should have clarified that its hard to make "good friends". Acquaintances are one thing. However, children tend to assist in those areas as you meet many other moms while the children befriend one another.
Thanks for all the info on Apex. We are really torn at this point, and going back up for one last look. We have one house in Durham we are viewing (all others we nixed because they were on top of, or too near, high tension power poles (don't really want those in my backyard). One house in N Raleigh, 4 in Wake Forest, 2 in Cary, and 3 in Apex. While we haven't necessarily narrowed down the "area" per say, we've narrowed down the homes, and hope to make a final decision. We are looking at Cary Christian and NRCA or Trinity (if we go the Durham route)...so we'll visit the schools, drive the areas, look at those few homes again and get off the pot! I really do appreciate everyone's insight. Our realtor seems scared to say anything (I know they have rules, and can't 'steer' anyone), and its frustrating when you want to know things like "do you think there are a lot of children here? Do you find its holding value? Do you think its convenient? Is there crime? Are the schools good? She just refers us to websites. Part of me thinks....if I have to do all the research, and I have to drive around the area to find the homes we want to see, and then gather all my other info from here and other resources...what is she really doing for us? Oh well, I digress. Thanks again, as we now feel we have some "resident" info that helps us greatly.
Our realtor seems scared to say anything (I know they have rules, and can't 'steer' anyone), and its frustrating when you want to know things like "do you think there are a lot of children here? Do you find its holding value? Do you think its convenient? Is there crime? Are the schools good? She just refers us to websites. Part of me thinks....if I have to do all the research, and I have to drive around the area to find the homes we want to see, and then gather all my other info from here and other resources...what is she really doing for us? Oh well, I digress. Thanks again, as we now feel we have some "resident" info that helps us greatly.
This is frustrating. Why can't a realtor answer these questions? We will be looking to work with a realtor in the near future and these are some pretty basic questions I would want answers to!
I'm curious to see where you will end up buying! You have many of the same criteria we do
This is frustrating. Why can't a realtor answer these questions? We will be looking to work with a realtor in the near future and these are some pretty basic questions I would want answers to!
I'm curious to see where you will end up buying! You have many of the same criteria we do
There are LAWS that dictate certain things that Realtors cannot discuss.
Children is one of those. It is based on back in the day when landlords didn't want to rent to folks with lots of children. Children were discriminated against so the law was established that Realtors cannot talk about children, even though folks want to know if they are around! Easy enough to find out...walk the n'hood, go door to door and ASK the neighbors!
As for crimes...criminals are not protected by Fair Housing laws!
However, how would a Realtor KNOW who lives in each home in every n'hood?!! That is why there are websites that make it so easy to check for criminals, etc.
However, the question...is it holding its value is an easy one to answer and isn't something that a Realtor "can't discuss".
Schools are easy to talk about...looking at the scores is helpful.
Is it convenient? Unless your Realtor doesn't know the area, that is an easy one to answer. If she/he doesn't know the area, check out the GPS. Ask the GPS where the grocery stores are, drugstores, etc.
I don't ask if there are children...I ask if its a friendly family oriented area, activities that cater to children, or any child resources close by. Driving the n'hood is a crap shoot sometimes, and when you are relocating from out of the area, its hard to make time to ask the neighbors, or do nothing but scope these places out. I also had a realtor license back in the day, and know that being as helpful as you can without breaking the laws is what I did. I would never just point clients to websites because that takes away from the personalized service they believe they are getting with a realtor. I also feel, as I'm sure you do, that personalized service is what gets referrals. If in the end, the buyer did all the work aside from the key to the house, then they may feel like they weren't given that service they thought they should receive.
I just wish she was more forthcoming. We get answers like "I think you might like the other area better'. When I ask why, I get "I just think you might". That doesn't help us really. If she doesn't want to say anything non-PC, or illegal, then pick something very legal to say that I can understand like "the area is NOT holding values, or you won't resell very easily, or the crime is increasing, or you'll have to drive past broken down trucks, trailers, and a burned down gas station every day on your way home". Anything! I'm not comparing very difficult places (Cary/Apex, N Raleigh and Wake Forest) All in all they seem like very simlar places aside from geography/price/proximity.
In the end, she is relatively new to the field, so I'm forgiving in that area. Its just a little frustrating that we know nothing about the area, and can't really know if she truly heard us, or is out for our best interest b/c we find all the houses via the internet to see, and we get very vanilla answers to questions. If we had friends or family in the area I'd rely on asking them...which is why I came to the board. Thanks all!
I don't ask if there are children...I ask if its a friendly family oriented area, activities that cater to children, or any child resources close by. Driving the n'hood is a crap shoot sometimes, and when you are relocating from out of the area, its hard to make time to ask the neighbors, or do nothing but scope these places out. I also had a realtor license back in the day, and know that being as helpful as you can without breaking the laws is what I did. I would never just point clients to websites because that takes away from the personalized service they believe they are getting with a realtor. I also feel, as I'm sure you do, that personalized service is what gets referrals. If in the end, the buyer did all the work aside from the key to the house, then they may feel like they weren't given that service they thought they should receive.
I just wish she was more forthcoming. We get answers like "I think you might like the other area better'. When I ask why, I get "I just think you might". That doesn't help us really. If she doesn't want to say anything non-PC, or illegal, then pick something very legal to say that I can understand like "the area is NOT holding values, or you won't resell very easily, or the crime is increasing, or you'll have to drive past broken down trucks, trailers, and a burned down gas station every day on your way home". Anything! I'm not comparing very difficult places (Cary/Apex, N Raleigh and Wake Forest) All in all they seem like very simlar places aside from geography/price/proximity.
In the end, she is relatively new to the field, so I'm forgiving in that area. Its just a little frustrating that we know nothing about the area, and can't really know if she truly heard us, or is out for our best interest b/c we find all the houses via the internet to see, and we get very vanilla answers to questions. If we had friends or family in the area I'd rely on asking them...which is why I came to the board. Thanks all!
Since she is new and may not know the area as well as you'd like, perhaps you could have a conversation with her Broker in Charge and he could help? Maybe there is another Agent in her office that would be willing to help?
This is a very expensive and important decision you are about to make. Please make sure you have all the answers to all your questions before you sign on the dotted line!
Vicki
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). I don't know why that would be true, though. I guess perhaps there is sort of a tendency for people to get more set in their ways as they get older, which can make it harder to open oneself to new experiences, including friendship relationships with new people. But that's hardly a universal tendency, and it seems like a tendency that's pretty easy to overcome with some willpower and self-management. Have you had a different experience?
I really do appreciate everyone's insight. Our realtor seems scared to say anything (I know they have rules, and can't 'steer' anyone), and its frustrating when you want to know things like "do you think there are a lot of children here? Do you find its holding value? Do you think its convenient? Is there crime? Are the schools good? She just refers us to websites. Part of me thinks....if I have to do all the research, and I have to drive around the area to find the homes we want to see, and then gather all my other info from here and other resources...what is she really doing for us? Oh well, I digress. Thanks again, as we now feel we have some "resident" info that helps us greatly.
Anything! 
Thanks all!
