Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Quick point of clarification. "South" is a restaurant in North Hills. Petunia mistakenly called it West Hills.
Now for my take on this thread:
Let me offer my observation here as someone who is native to the West Coast (Bay Area, basically) and currently splits time between Miami Beach and Downtown Raleigh.
I think it's human nature to look for things that will confirm what we expect to find. The South probably has the biggest set of things we expect to find: many of which are not seen as positive. When we aren't truly open to the idea of moving, we look for negative confirmation or at least that's what sticks in our minds the most.
Additionally, it's been my experience that Californians in general have blinders on when it comes to places east of Lake Tahoe except for their favorite ski resorts or places where they have gone in mass to drive up real estate prices. NYC and a few other places will earn the respect of Californians due to their sheer size and importance but will always be tempered by "their terrible weather". "How can anyone live there....blah, blah, blah." Now, this is not to say that Petunia falls into that category but that's my general experience every time I talk to Californians or go back to Californians (which I do very often for work).
At the same time, I can also relate to the vast differences that exist between different places. Miami Beach and Raleigh could hardly be more different from each other. That said, I appreciate them both for what they are. What one lacks, the other has. And, this is not just a one way street where Miami Beach makes up for what Raleigh lacks. Raleigh offers things that can't be found in Miami Beach. It offers civility, professionalism, courtesy, nature, ease of life and intelligent conversation.....all of which are seriously lacking in Miami Beach. Living in the Glenwood South area of Raleigh gives me plenty of opportunity for nightlife and activity that I enjoy in SouthBeach. It may not be EVERY single night but I don't want it every single night. Conversely, when in Miami Beach, I am able to spend a quiet evening at home or something simple with a few friends although I have hyper-activity right around the corner. In the end, I can find that I can live my life enjoyably in either place and make them be what I want them to be.
I notice that Petunia thought this forum rocked. Well Petunia, have you considered that you are experiencing something wonderful about Raleigh....people mostly care about each other and are willing to be helpful. Everytime I come to Raleigh, I am blown away by how generally courteous and friendly people are. When my friends come from Miami to visit, they are amazed that people wave from their cars even when you don't know them. They are amazaed that people say hello and make eye contact walking down a sidewalk. They are amazed that a driver will sometimes let you into traffic from a difficult merge instead of always racing to cut you off. They are amazed that people are treated as human beings and not just cogs on the wheel of a machine. While this isn't true for all people all the time in the Triangle, it does exist more here than it does in other hyper growth metros I have experieced. Somehow, this place seems to have an effect on people for the better. People who thought they'd never fit in or like it often find themselves becoming the areas greatest cheerleaders. Count me among them.
While I don't doubt that Petunia perceived that she was being delayed by useless chatter every time she went to a cashier etc., I am finding that hard to believe. I do, however, believe that the transactions may have taken an extra 20 seconds as the cashiers attempted to treat her like the human being she is. I wish her luck and good fortune wherever her life takes her. And, if it takes her to North Carolina, I wish her the easiest transition possible...
Quick point of clarification. "South" is a restaurant in North Hills. Petunia mistakenly called it West Hills.
While I don't doubt that Petunia perceived that she was being delayed by useless chatter every time she went to a cashier etc., I am finding that hard to believe. I do, however, believe that the transactions may have taken an extra 20 seconds as the cashiers attempted to treat her like the human being she is. I wish her luck and good fortune wherever her life takes her. And, if it takes her to North Carolina, I wish her the easiest transition possible...
Yes, I tend to get my directions mixed up sometimes Thanks for the correction.
RE: the useless chatter. I have to say, I'm very sensitive to people telling me their woes. It must be my face. Everywhere I go people tell me their problems. I own a shop with a counter... I think the suburban housewife finds this to be her forum for telling me about all her problems. After many a year of retail... I could write a tell-all book about my city... and which husbands have been unfaithful I know too much... again, I think it's my face... not NC. I apologize.
Perhaps this is the LA stress and skepticism I was speaking of
I'm very attracted to this idea that the general public of NC is courteous and people treat each other with respect... the waving, which I didn't encounter, sounds awesome! To think, I could open up another little boutique and have kind, thoughtful customers... that would be a dream come true I know there isn't any guarantee... but I'm liking the sound of it all!
Really... after the first visit to Cary, I never wanted to leave. I described what we saw as a "Norman Rockwell painting come to life!" Then I came home to the sad faces of my family, angry that I would even think of moving away from this perfect mecca, and them. Maybe... I'm trying to convince them that the move is right and not myself? hmmm...
When I was single in LA, I enjoyed taking the Olympic Blvd bus directly to Santa Monica beach for a day of fun.
Took about 45 minutes and cost only 50 cents or so.
We took our daughter to the famous MacArthur Park on Alvarado St to see the Fourth of July fireworks and rented paddleboats there to go around the lake.
LA is now overcrowded, expensive, and crime-ridden. Hope Raleigh never goes that way.
I lived in San Francisco right out of college, from '78 to '82. I loved it. I had a blast even though I was broke. In 1982 I found a job in Seattle and didn't return to SF (to live--I spent lots of time back there visiting and also on business) until 1988.
The city had changed so much in 10 years. Or maybe it was my perspective. Or both? What seemed to me to be so bright, vibrant and clean, after coming from Boston in 1978 just seemed grungy, dirty and unsafe coming back from Seattle and then Portland, OR in 1988. We lived in Marin County (which I loved) but I hated the commute and hated my job. When we moved back up to Seattle, I got flipped off regulary by people up there who saw me as just another Californian arriving to screw up the beauty of the PNW and drive up housing prices.
Petunia, sorry to hear that your family isn't terribly supportive. Have they always lived in the same area? Would you be the first member of your family to move away in quite a while?
Petunia, if you move let us know where you open your shop. We could use some more locally owned funky west coast vibed shops. We'll be there to help you celebrate opening day!
Petunia, if you move let us know where you open your shop. We could use some more locally owned funky west coast vibed shops. We'll be there to help you celebrate opening day!
Really... after the first visit to Cary, I never wanted to leave. I described what we saw as a "Norman Rockwell painting come to life!" Then I came home to the sad faces of my family, angry that I would even think of moving away from this perfect mecca, and them. Maybe... I'm trying to convince them that the move is right and not myself? hmmm...
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsSteel
Petunia, sorry to hear that your family isn't terribly supportive. Have they always lived in the same area? Would you be the first member of your family to move away in quite a while?
This is definitely something to consider. Moving away from your hometown and your family is not easy at all.
When I moved here, it was the first time anyone in my immediate family moved out of FL. My mother was born and raised in the city that I was born and raised; my father wasn't born there but practically lived his entire life in Miami as well. My sister and I only left home to attend college in Gainesville, FL, which is still within reasonable (by FL standards) driving distance from home.
Moving to Raleigh was a huge leap for me in many ways, but the part that was the hardest was moving away from my family. I miss them a lot, but life in FL just didn't hold much opportunity for me and the goals that I have in life. It is tough, especially since I lived so close to home after I finished college and saw my parents a lot. Now they are starting to think about moving when my father retires, and I'm trying to convince them that the winters aren't that bad here . But at the same time, I want them to go somewhere where they will be happy. I hope that we will be within at least two hours driving distance of each other at some point. That would be ideal!
Whatever decision you make, Petunia, make it based on YOUR happiness. You are ultimately the one that has to live it first-hand.
Hi It was very refreshing to read your story and expiriences. Since I am from Miami Bch. Fl. and have lived here all my life, I am 50, my husband is 55 has " been" the most ( pushy)about the move even though I am open to it. Miami has changed so so much and the people are getting worse by the day. ( the majority are arrogant, self absorbed, rude,materialistic, and not very spirtiual ( and I dont mean organized religon)
I guess we have out grown it. But N. Carolina still kinda scares me.. I have been in NY for work but not actually lived there, I have been in LA but not lived there, Chicago, and Italy. So I have no Idea what I am getting in to.
We are renting for the 1st year a house just to make sure we love it and want to stay.
I'm a realtor and the market is not going to change and go up-price wise for at least 2-3 years or more.
Thanks any other comments you may have I appreciate.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Thanks for the correction.
To think, I could open up another little boutique and have kind, thoughtful customers... that would be a dream come true 
