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Well....I experienced Raleigh and surrounding towns this past weekend. Despite all the wonderful information on this blog, it was really useful to visit and get my own feel for the area. After eating at several restaurants, walking around Raleigh and speaking to many of the locals (natives and transplants) I can honestly say there felt like a difference in the warmth of the people. They certainly were much more inviting than I'm used to here in Connecticut. That being said, I was not impressed with the surrounding towns (in particular Cary, Apex, Holly Springs, Fuquay-Varina and Wake Forest). Cary, although safe and nice store and restaurant offerings was peppered with Truman Show houses (all with the same structure, piece of land-sometimes even the same color). And what's the deal with every neighborhood being LABELED. I thought segregation disappeared years ago. In CT they call these neighborhoods Cluster Housing (subdivisions) and they are frowned upon by most as promoting a community within a community. Hey maybe you can never leave your living room- then you'll have a community within a community, within a community- can't get much safer than that.
Unfortunately I was deeply disappointed with what I had hoped would be a great opportunity for my family in I. But the depressed and down-trodden looking areas that plagued Apex, Garner, FV and other towns was enough to remind me of how much I should appreciate New England. Character houses are few and far between. Even the beautiful neighborhood ITB on the west side of Raleigh had a MASSIVE PRISON as its backyard- about a 7-iron away. I think this trip was a wake up call to me that there are nice people everywhere and just because my co-worker isn't that pleasant, it shouldn't be a reason to pack up to the Triangle. Raleigh had some fun nightlife on Glenwood South and certainly was clean. There are great opportunities for growing businesses and young artists. Having a nuclear reactor nearby doesn't appeal to me much either. It was a great experience. I'd love to drop in again for a fun night out. But to live in an area with little to no charm will keep me in the beauty of New England. I will work harder to find the nice people who are out there.
Thanks all!
P.S. Big Ed's was a fun breakfast place. Not digging grits much though!
Not meaning to be defensive, but your post is slightly obnoxious. Little to no charm? There are lots of charming places in the Triangle. There are so many beautiful parks where we live. I grew up in CT and agree it is beautiful. Maybe you should remember that when you tell people that where you live is much better than where they live, it might be perceived as insulting.
Bryon, sounds like a good experience overall. I loved your Truman Show analogy. I lived in Boylan Heights in a rental home right after college and I could see Central Prison from the front porch. We could even hear them do the "lockdown, lights out" call over the PA at night when the windows were open. I always felt pretty safe there, though. Prisons are designed to keep the bad folks in, and even if one got out, I figured the last place they'd stop would be a house overlooking the prison they'd just escaped!
To say this is an area of little to no charm seems a bit off. I agree that the suburbs at times seem endless and homogenous. To many, that's what they love about the area, but like you, it's not my preference. I have to ask if you made it to historic Durham, Chapel Hill or Carrboro? I believe those are areas where you'd have found a bit more of the types of neighborhoods you were looking for.
Not meaning to be defensive, but your post is slightly obnoxious. Little to no charm? There are lots of charming places in the Triangle. There are so many beautiful parks where we live. I grew up in CT and agree it is beautiful. Maybe you should remember that when you tell people that where you live is much better than where they live, it might be perceived as insulting.
I've learned that trying to be politically correct with semantics keeps people from being authentic, but I appreciate your concern. Indeed there are beautiful parks in the area. In particular one in Cary that I thought was gorgeous. But the town squares and the numerous pine-needle infested homes with few character homes I do not view as charming. There was very little home upkeep. Of course I did not see every neighborhood in every town so I'm sure there are those that are well kept. However, I feel that my tireless touring gave me enough info. to assess AS A WHOLE, it's not for me. My apologies if that sounds insulting. Sensitivity is a curse as much as a blessing.
I personally take no offense to it. I have visited areas that I know I would not want to live in, especially if I was making the decision to do so as you would have been. I would say that what you observed in this area is most likely quite similar to most other mid-to-large cities/towns in the south, and even more so out west. The things you mentioned about CT that you like are in large part due to it being an established population center for a long time. Most of the things you seemed to dislike about this area stem post-industrial growth that has been rapid and out of control. One area you might find to your liking in NC is the Asheville area. Personally, its one of my favorite places in the country, and if I could do my job from there I'd be moving tomorrow.
Hats off to you for being insightful and introspective with regard to those things that are important to you, rather than chasing an emotional fantasy and finding yourself disappointed after you've moved.
I moved from CA to NH 2 years ago, and we'll be in NC in 2 weeks due to my husband's job relocation. I am VERY sad to leave NH...I felt like I came home here. However, I'm heartened and encouraged that Raleigh/Durham is a wonderful place, too. It's just different, that's all.
I'm glad you had the opportunity to really scour the place before making a decision. Best of luck in the future.
I can't believe how difficult it is for people to be pleasant up here. Please tell me it is more relaxed down there, because despite my willingness to take a significant pay cut, I would gladly do it to be free from the cerebral, status-oriented, did-you-recycle-your-cardboard too communities that are filled with high achieving but very lonely and anxiety-filled people that believe their families and issues are at the center of the universe.
Bryon - your place doesn't sound all that charming either. And it sounds like you were running AWAY from something, rather than TO something. That kind of scenario never works out.
There are a lot of Truman Show like in the South, West, etc. But it's not all that. There are some beautiful tree lined neighborhhoods in Cary of every price range from Tanglewood to Lochmere. North Raleigh has some neighborhoods that remind me of New England.
But if it doesn't feel right don't push it because it seems like a hot spot in NC. At least you will help out with the overcrowding problem by staying in CT.
I just want to add that calling Apex "depressed and down-trodden" is certainly a unique perspective. You must have been expecting beverly hills to have gotten that impression. Apex is one of the prettiest areas I have ever seen. Ah well, to each his own. Like I said... NOT for everyone!
Bryon, good for you for investigating the area personally. You can spend years reading the threads on this forum, but that will never compare to personal experience. Did you have someone here to show you around or did you do it all by yourself?
I must admit that I prefer the western side of the Triangle over the eastern side that you visited. But even so, it sounds like you'll be happier staying in New England. Maybe what you really need is a new job or new friends instead of a new state. At any rate, good luck. Hope you find some peace & happiness soon.
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Raleigh trip
At any rate, good luck. Hope you find some peace & happiness soon.
