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Old 10-27-2013, 08:32 AM
 
6 posts, read 7,692 times
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Hi everyone! Long time since I have been on this forum. So long I had to come up with another screen name! I wanted to write asking for a little reassurance. I moved from NJ to Cary in 2010 with my Hubby and dogs and I loved it!!! Love it so much in fact we bought a house in Apex and even had a baby. But my husband found an business opportunity that sent us to S. Florida in 2012 and I have been a mess ever since. Like Murphy's Law, nothing has been going right. I found the people to be rude, selfish, only caring about money and seeing who can out do someone else. That is not my style of life (I'm a sippin' on lemonade on the porch watching my kids play kind of gal) and I find myself as 1. a new Mother and 2. overwhelmed with this fish out of water life. I find the area beautiful but also a tad too hot for too many months. It's also crowded, dangerous drivers, crime is higher, schools arn't quite as good as NC unless you go outside public. But most of all, I find myself worried for my daughters well-being, her education, and although people call this paradise, for me personally....it's chaotic!!!!

My husband and I both agreed this was a great choice for our family on the business end but not our lifestyle. We are able to move back to Apex. Of course, I am a little fearful from my mistake coming down to S. Florida. And I don't want to make another one. I haven't been back to visit since I left but my memories there were happy ones. Quieter, peaceful, slower unless you want the Raleigh/Durham action, nicer people, great weather, tons to do, etc. Is that still accurate? When I left my baby was only 6mo, now she's almost 2. Apex/Cary is still a great choice to raise my daughter, right? Has anyone else left the triangle only to move back? Thanks guys in advance. Sometimes the grass is not always greener, you know?
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Old 10-27-2013, 11:14 AM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
2,535 posts, read 4,496,034 times
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We left in 2011 for one year and moved back in 2012. Nothing has changed except for a few more shops. :-) Incidentally I grew up in S. Florida. You can't really go wrong moving up here. Actually most of the people I gerw up with have relocated someplace north. Carolinas, Georgia, central FL. South Florida is just not a good place to raise a family.
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Old 10-27-2013, 01:31 PM
 
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pegotty, THANK YOU!!!!!!! Thank you so much!!! You have no idea how much your words make me feel! I was certain my fears were just because it would be a "big move" again. I LOVED the triangle before! I mean loved!!! People here are so nasty it blows my mind and I am originally from N. NJ and I am saying that. I love how kind, classy and comforting NC is. It does have a calming factor and most people seem to know whats important in life vs down here people seem to just care about how cool they look, what they are wearing...or who they are wearing, how much money they have, etc. I noticed my daughter was far more loving and even natured than kids down here. Lots of them act out on crazy levels. 2 year olds head butting everyone and other stuff I won't even mention. But when I mention I want to move home, people here think Im crazy! Then call me crazy, Florida, because I'm coming home!!
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Old 10-27-2013, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, NC
8,354 posts, read 12,054,277 times
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South Florida is one of those places that you either love or hate. I am a frequent visitor to the area and in fact, we have co-owned a condo with my MIL there for 10 years, so I know it pretty well. South Florida is paradise in the winter on vacation, and many people have great times and happy memories of visiting there. But it appears that living there is different. The area attracts a lot of people "down on their luck" looking for good weather. The schools, overall, are not ranked well, although there are some good ones here and there. There seems to be a lot of crime, too. Very nice neighborhoods are tucked right next to bad ones. Couple that with never-ending heat, lack of small town charms (mostly highways there), too far away to travel to other areas, and a large transplant population, and it's understandable that it's not everyone's cup of tea.

My sister lived down there for a bit and hated it, too. I have two good friends who each lived there who tell me also that they really disliked living there. And I have a high school classmate who I am in touch with on FB who just moved back up North after years and years in S. Florida who is giddy with joy that she left. Heck, go on the Florida boards and you'll read tons of people who hate living there.

Of course others love it because of the weather and the beach/ocean/sporting opportunities. But I don't think it's a place you grow to love. If you hate it there, it doesn't sound like it will grow on you, especially if you adjusted to the Triangle right away.

I've never lived there, but I talked about it for many years and I cannot tell you how many times I heard, "You'll hate living there. It's not the same as visiting."

If you have an opportunity to move back then grab it. It sounds like you will be much happier.

*I'm not dissing South Florida, because I do love it there and think I'd be one of the people who actually would like living there but I know that many, many people do not.
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Old 10-28-2013, 06:18 AM
 
6 posts, read 7,692 times
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michgc, I really appreciate every word you said! And I think your exactly right. It's a wonderful place to visit, and I will surely return for that but to raise a young family....ahhhhh not my cup of tea. I grew up in the North East but in an area where I could still play outside and go to the city when we wanted to do something a little bigger-Just like living in Apex, Cary, CH, some areas of Raleigh and beyond. It was a wonderful upbringing and I loved the chance of seasons. Even though we don't get much snow, it is accessible with a small road trip.

I love the beach and all that watersporty stuff but with a 1 1/2 year old, I am really not going to be able to take on those activities. But I can take my daughter fishing at Bond Park in the small electric boats!! And we can always drive to the beach. I am rambling as I come up with something I love of NC then anther comes, and another, and another. I am just thankful for your feedback. Although my friends (in NC and North) and family fully support our decision, it's always nice to hear it from someone else who does not just agree with you because they love you.

I cannot get back to the NC way of life. I remember the very first time I came down from NJ looking for a home to rent. Never came to NC. Not once. I got off the plane and out of the airport and thought, where am I, this place is so beautiful! And it smelled like spring and flowers (it was Feb). It was also tee shirt warm but oh so comfortable. I cried on the plane home as I knew I would return, but in 3 months! But once I did, I made my lil home a feathered nest, everyday was a great day, met amazing friends and was so happy, I ended up blissfully pregnant with a daughter who makes my heart sing. She deserves a amazing upbringing where her mother isn't terrified and stressed out. Can't wait to come home!
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Old 10-28-2013, 07:14 AM
 
152 posts, read 314,137 times
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I think you are correct about Florida. When we moved to Raleigh, I thought at first I would like Florida more because of the warmer temps. Spent about 5-6 trips to Florida scouring for a place to live and each time came back empty handed. The weather is fantastic there, however you have to live amongst the "people" and my experience is they are not so fantastic.

Great place to take a vacation.
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Old 10-28-2013, 08:53 AM
 
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Esteban Dime, Oh I completely agree with everything you say. There is a ton of the "keeping up with the Joneses" people and families along with the rude and judgmental. One thing my husband told me is his boss recently had to attend a funeral here in S. Florida. All of the families (those with children) were broken up. All of them but hubbies boss and friend! Which is strange as there were like 300+ people there. People were not so much morning the loss of a beloved friend or family member, they were more concerned on tooting their own horn all while showing off this seasons latest and most expensive handbags/clothes. Needless to say, my hubby's boss was horrified as was my husband over the story. I saw an arrogant as anything older man let a door at the mall hit a very pregnant woman while she was carrying presents! She was not moving fast enough for his watch so he just looked at her like "f-it!" and let the door hit her. I almost cried! Who does that?? My daughter loves to wave and say hello to anyone. 8 out of 9 times when she does, the person getting the hello gives my daughter a nasty, dirty look like they are smelling poop. It's like JEEZ guys! She's just a little girl saying hello, calm down!
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Old 10-28-2013, 09:25 AM
 
219 posts, read 411,149 times
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Bless your heart, you need to put your stuff in some boxes and move back here ASAP!

After being out of the NC bubble, the world can seem a lot darker, colder and unfriendlier. Life is too short to live that way. Come back!

Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaBlondie View Post
Esteban Dime, Oh I completely agree with everything you say. There is a ton of the "keeping up with the Joneses" people and families along with the rude and judgmental. One thing my husband told me is his boss recently had to attend a funeral here in S. Florida. All of the families (those with children) were broken up. All of them but hubbies boss and friend! Which is strange as there were like 300+ people there. People were not so much morning the loss of a beloved friend or family member, they were more concerned on tooting their own horn all while showing off this seasons latest and most expensive handbags/clothes. Needless to say, my hubby's boss was horrified as was my husband over the story. I saw an arrogant as anything older man let a door at the mall hit a very pregnant woman while she was carrying presents! She was not moving fast enough for his watch so he just looked at her like "f-it!" and let the door hit her. I almost cried! Who does that?? My daughter loves to wave and say hello to anyone. 8 out of 9 times when she does, the person getting the hello gives my daughter a nasty, dirty look like they are smelling poop. It's like JEEZ guys! She's just a little girl saying hello, calm down!
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Old 10-28-2013, 09:42 AM
 
6 posts, read 7,692 times
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You're so sweet!! Thank you. I actually said the other day to a Floridian, "Can I bless my own heart?" They said, "Can you what with your heart?" LOL! I said, "Oh never mind". I understand NC isn't for everyone but when it's right, it is so right. It knows how to suck you in, give you a huge warm hug and make you believe everywhere is just as loving. Oh so not true! We're coming back to visit in 2 1/2 weeks and we hope to open escrow on a house! *SO EXCITED*
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Old 10-28-2013, 11:10 AM
 
Location: Vero Beach, Fl.
582 posts, read 981,426 times
Reputation: 354
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaBlondie View Post
Hi everyone! Long time since I have been on this forum. So long I had to come up with another screen name! I wanted to write asking for a little reassurance. I moved from NJ to Cary in 2010 with my Hubby and dogs and I loved it!!! Love it so much in fact we bought a house in Apex and even had a baby. But my husband found an business opportunity that sent us to S. Florida in 2012 and I have been a mess ever since. Like Murphy's Law, nothing has been going right. I found the people to be rude, selfish, only caring about money and seeing who can out do someone else. That is not my style of life (I'm a sippin' on lemonade on the porch watching my kids play kind of gal) and I find myself as 1. a new Mother and 2. overwhelmed with this fish out of water life. I find the area beautiful but also a tad too hot for too many months. It's also crowded, dangerous drivers, crime is higher, schools arn't quite as good as NC unless you go outside public. But most of all, I find myself worried for my daughters well-being, her education, and although people call this paradise, for me personally....it's chaotic!!!!

My husband and I both agreed this was a great choice for our family on the business end but not our lifestyle. We are able to move back to Apex. Of course, I am a little fearful from my mistake coming down to S. Florida. And I don't want to make another one. I haven't been back to visit since I left but my memories there were happy ones. Quieter, peaceful, slower unless you want the Raleigh/Durham action, nicer people, great weather, tons to do, etc. Is that still accurate? When I left my baby was only 6mo, now she's almost 2. Apex/Cary is still a great choice to raise my daughter, right? Has anyone else left the triangle only to move back? Thanks guys in advance. Sometimes the grass is not always greener, you know?
Funny you are feeling this, I/we are in the reverse situation, we are born and raised in NYC but lived in Ft. Lauderdale a area almost 30 years, our 2 children grew up they and did fine, though they are 31 & 28 now, so things may have changed, I agree South florida has gotten crazy there, part of the reason we moved to the Raleigh area, but I have been here almost 7 years now and am not liking it as much as when we first moved here, a large part of it is that we have no family here, our daughter is still in Coral Springs, and getting married in Jan. And out son lives in NYC so we don't get to see them nearly as much as we thought we would mainly because of $$$ and time ( I guess), then there is the colder than than I expected temps, not to mention totaling my truck this past winter on the "ICE" don't need to be held in the house until the ice/snow melts, partly because they don't treat the secondary roads as they do the main roads :-( and I hate wearing sweats and heavy socks in the house, (during the winter) when I use to wear shorts and flip flops most of the year! Hence, we are contemplating moving back to the Central Florida area ? (Not South Florida)
So I guess people are always on the move, seeking happiness and contentment, and people will be quick to add their 2 cents and say "Happiness is where you make it" and they are entitled to their opinions ! NC is beautiful, but being 2+ hrs. From the beach and 3+ hours from the mountains! It's a bit much, but on a good note they are building a Cabela's in Garner, LoL anyway, that's my 2 cents, hope it all works out for you guys!
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