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Old 10-29-2019, 02:07 PM
 
Location: NC
610 posts, read 1,306,864 times
Reputation: 173

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Hello,
Are there any good/useful sleep training services/help we can get locally? Via google I found a few locally but wanted to see if anyone had first hand information. (We are told there are many books, but aside that)

Our almost 10 month old boy (at night) wakes up roughly every 1.5 to 2 hours. It's likely our fault, but our only mode of putting him to sleep is walking & rocking him. Even that often he wants to jump out, twists and turns till he falls asleep in our arms and we put him on the bed. This is turning out to be hard as at times he keeps waking up as we put him down and doesn't even sleep the 1.5 hours!. He is about 21lbs, so rocking ain't kind on our backs. Of late, he won't even allow us to sit in the rocking chair.

His day naps are fine at 1.5 to 2 hours, twice totaling about 4 hrs during the day. He's breast fed and formula fed. Solid food, not much has started consistently & been a challenge. We never got him to sleep in crib earlier. So, he co sleeps with mommy in a low regular bed. We use a white noise machine. Evening routine is, bathe around 6.30 pm, then mommy feeds him (either nurses or formula) then either of us rock him to sleep around 7 pm. With the rocking (from daddy) he usually falls at he sleeps in about 10 minutes. Then, we put him in the bed where he sleeps at best for 2 hours.

When he wakes up, he is usually just sitting up, then plops down a few times as through he is going to sleep, then sits up, starts crawling etc eventually playing/babbling or at times crying. At this point, one of us pick him up in under 5 minutes, again start the rocking/walking till he sleeps. (Night feed is roughly every 4 hours).

thanks,
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Old 10-29-2019, 02:16 PM
 
34 posts, read 20,227 times
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I don’t know about training, but does he use a paci? Ours loved these:

Natursutten Large 12 mo up, Natural Rubber Pacifier, Butterfly Shield, Rounded Nipple https://www.amazon.com/dp/B006G9F8RE..._c-iUDbXCSCZFJ
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Old 10-29-2019, 02:20 PM
 
1,086 posts, read 2,653,827 times
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Welcome to the club. It took use 2.5 years to get our kid to sleep through the night and 4 years with the other one. We tired everything. My advice is dont fight, it goes quick and your will forget even quicker.

You can also get some professional help which can be expensive. https://www.firstdaze.com/about-us
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Old 10-29-2019, 02:29 PM
 
Location: under the beautiful Carolina blue
17,353 posts, read 26,668,319 times
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I'd bite the bullet and put him to bed AWAKE. Trust me you will be so much happier once you’re over hump. No sleep trainer is gonna tell you any different. He can't fall back asleep when he wakes at night because he can't fall asleep on his own to start with. In a crib. If you don't want to use a crib you are destined to deal with this till HE is ready to sleep through the night. He is going to be fully mobile soon, so if you think it's a problem now, just wait.

yes it's gonna be tough. But he will learn to do it. And he will sleep all night.

The rest of your routine including bed time is perfect.
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Old 10-29-2019, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Raleigh
8,780 posts, read 6,572,741 times
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I know every kid is different, but two things our close friends did to have their now 12 month old sleeping mostly through the night somewhat early...

One, they were sort of militant about making sure there wasn't too much napping especially late in the day; this included arguments with Grandma who couldn't fathom waking a sleeping baby...

Two, they had a specific amount of food they wanted in the baby's belly before putting her to bed and made sure she drank all of that bottle before putting her down/moving towards the nighttime routine.

One more thought...Have you looked at whether or not the baby is allergic or intolerant of one of her foods? Could be mom's milk or the formula. The sign for them was baby acne that cleared up after switching formulas.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gcretro View Post
When he wakes up, he is usually just sitting up, then plops down a few times as through he is going to sleep, then sits up, starts crawling etc eventually playing/babbling or at times crying. At this point, one of us pick him up in under 5 minutes, again start the rocking/walking till he sleeps. (Night feed is roughly every 4 hours).

thanks,
This made me think of something else. Have his pediatrician look at his tonsils/adenoids. My middle brother was a horribly "collicky" baby, wasn't much of an eater, horridly difficult to get to bed. As a kid he would sit up in his sleep. I remember as I shared a bedroom with him after he graduated from the crib. I said something to my parents about how he satup in his sleep but since I was 4 or 5 it was ignored. He also would go into Mom and Dad's room most nights because he got cold because he was sitting up in his sleep and wiggling out of the blankets. Eventually, an Aunt stayed over with us, and slept in the spare bed in our room. She noticed and told my mom that she needed to bring it up to the doctor because he sat up 12 times in his sleep.

They did a tonsilectomy and it was like flipping a switch...All of a sudden he ate like he had a hollow leg, slept through the night without getting into mom and dad's bed, etc. He didn't eat well because he couldn't taste the food or breathe normally when he ate, and he wouldn't go down to sleep as a baby because he couldn't breathe normally.

We're genetically tall and big enough that it wasn't noticed on the growth charts but he's notably shorter than me, my Dad, my other brother, possibly shorter than my Mom.
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Old 10-29-2019, 03:30 PM
 
Location: Cary
2,680 posts, read 3,150,648 times
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This is what we did for twins and it worked like a charm.



The Ferber method, or Ferberization, is a technique invented by Dr. Richard Ferber to solve infant sleep problems. It involves "baby-training" children to self-soothe by allowing the child to cry for a predetermined amount of time before receiving external comfort. You can google it.



Took a week or two but it worked. We'd carry them around to burp them after nighttime feeding and they'd fall asleep on our shoulders. They'd then start to cry once we bent over their cribs to put them to bed. Then they'd hang on to the burp cloths. My wife made "luvies" out of the soft burp cloths (created a little ghost-type thing) so we'd put them down with these luvies and followed the Ferber method.
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Old 10-29-2019, 03:54 PM
 
Location: Raleigh NC
10,576 posts, read 7,755,213 times
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put them in a crib, in their own room, at a predetermined time.

leave them there until the morning. Unless you have good reason to believe they've injured themselves or are actually sick.

You're learning the hard way, and the baby's learning the easy way, who is boss.
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Old 10-29-2019, 05:39 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, NC, formerly DC and Phila
8,658 posts, read 12,906,509 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by C_Lan View Post
This is what we did for twins and it worked like a charm.



The Ferber method, or Ferberization, is a technique invented by Dr. Richard Ferber to solve infant sleep problems. It involves "baby-training" children to self-soothe by allowing the child to cry for a predetermined amount of time before receiving external comfort. You can google it.



Took a week or two but it worked. We'd carry them around to burp them after nighttime feeding and they'd fall asleep on our shoulders. They'd then start to cry once we bent over their cribs to put them to bed. Then they'd hang on to the burp cloths. My wife made "luvies" out of the soft burp cloths (created a little ghost-type thing) so we'd put them down with these luvies and followed the Ferber method.

Don't want to get into a debate, but the Ferber method is very controversial. This article seems to take a balanced approach to the Ferber method and its pros and cons:

https://www.parentingscience.com/Ferber-method.html

OP, I imagine your child's naps are what is contributing to him not being able to sleep at night. It might be time for him to give one of them up.

Also, as a mother of a tween and two teenagers, I want to reassure you that this stage does not last forever even if it seems like it will never end. Best of luck to you!
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Old 10-29-2019, 06:02 PM
 
Location: under the beautiful Carolina blue
17,353 posts, read 26,668,319 times
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I definitely don't agree with giving up a nap (aren't you glad you opened this can o' worms, OP? LOL). My kids (twins and a singleton) all napped till they were past 3 and all of them took TWO naps a day till they were about 18 months. My kids all finished elementary school going to bed by 8 p.m. You also do not need to let them "cry it out" if that makes you uncomfortable. Your child should be put down sleepy but not asleep. Use a sound machine, use some soft music - whatever works - but baby needs to fall asleep alone and they will self soothe back to sleep during the night.

There is an expression - sleep begets sleep - meaning - an overtired baby will not go to sleep easily. You can try giving up a nap but don't be surprised if that doesn't work. This has been going on since you had the baby so I don't think the nap is the culprit - it's your entire set up.
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Old 10-29-2019, 06:27 PM
 
1,656 posts, read 1,937,092 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoBromhal View Post
put them in a crib, in their own room, at a predetermined time.

leave them there until the morning. Unless you have good reason to believe they've injured themselves or are actually sick.

You're learning the hard way, and the baby's learning the easy way, who is boss.
Ditto. People are afraid to show who kids are the boss. Its why you see so many little monsters running around without discipline. It's okay if a kid cries.
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