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Old 06-01-2008, 11:12 PM
 
Location: South Beach and DT Raleigh
11,543 posts, read 17,897,134 times
Reputation: 10686

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If you find that NC is not for you, then leave. It's simple as that. I don't want to sound harsh but nobody is going to cry as your moving van heads in the opposite direction. There's plenty of people who will come to the Triangle because they truly love it.
Frankly, I don't want people living in my town(s) if they don't want to be there. I want people who want to be where they are because it's those people who are going to move the area forward.
There are two big categories of people who move to the area. They are:
1. People who come and complain that it's deficient and doesn't have what they are used to having. In my opinion, these people can just leave.
2. People who come and see opportunity, possibility and are energized by being a part of rapidly growing dynamic community. These are the people who are going to make the area more than we can currently imagine. Let's welcome these people and their energy with open arms.

 
Old 06-02-2008, 03:09 AM
 
Location: North Carolina
531 posts, read 1,766,025 times
Reputation: 302
I would guess that money is no object to the original poster. I mean, they're going to lose tens and tens and TENS of thousands of dollars on this whole enterprise. All those closing costs unrecouped. All the moving costs TWICE in short order. More closing costs as they re-buy a house in LI. Yikes! I guess if you can afford to do that, the "money advantage" in NC is not of any concern to them.

A personal experience: I lived on LI for three years as a college student. I hated it. I did not get along well with most of the natives. I never got used to it. I think I can understand where these folks are coming from, in reverse.


[quote=Gatornation;3951890]
Well whether people want to admit it or not money is one of the main reasons people move or don't move. My company is trying to convince people to move to the NE to NC or TX. Basically all they talk about is cost of living. When talking to people considering the move money is always the big appeal. quote]
 
Old 06-02-2008, 06:21 AM
 
Location: North Raleigh
820 posts, read 2,502,619 times
Reputation: 474
Quote:
Originally Posted by CaliBoy View Post
No matter the validity or point, the truth of the matter is that some who relocate truly find that the grass is not greener for them... even if it's the greenest for those already there. In this case, I think the responses to the OP's post are what drives the point, really.

I hope everyone can agree that the triangle isn't for everyone, even considering people who live in North Carolina. I've got a brother in law who lives in the Asheville area who, would feel the same way.

It just seems a bit odd (and maybe it is just me) to post here in this way. I guess if it were me I'd just want to leave, say good by to my friends, and go where the grass IS greener for me. I'm not saying the OP's post was harsh or anything along those lines and maybe some need to take opinions of the area less personally; but just as it is hard to spin a "Don't let the door hit you on the way out post", it's equally hard to spin a "There is nothing here to do in your city post". Even if you add in a "I think the people are great", some will still wonder why the poster felt the need to post. Just my opinion. Nothing but best wishes for OCEANSEA, as I said, the triangle isn't for everyone. I'm just trying to provide a different perspective for some of the harsher responses.
 
Old 06-02-2008, 06:24 AM
 
Location: Raleigh NC
1,254 posts, read 4,265,888 times
Reputation: 946
Good Luck with your move back...but I think you should have given it more time here...just my opinion...best wishes for you and your family
 
Old 06-02-2008, 06:36 AM
 
9,558 posts, read 26,423,497 times
Reputation: 9679
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeJaquish View Post
Good point, if obliquely made, nodding to freedom of choice.
The OP has that freedom.

If there are not other constraints keeping them here, should we assume that the benefits of our fine area override their reasonable desires?

I think that would be presumptuous of any of us.

I met folks who came to town for 10 months, were as fine a family as you could meet, and within that period of time realized they had made a mistake.
They could have pestered the world with negativity, but just made the decision to move again to where they had been content for many years. No recriminations, just freedom of choice...
Works for me.
Good post. Everybody is different. Works for me too.
 
Old 06-02-2008, 06:41 AM
 
1,219 posts, read 3,745,501 times
Reputation: 579
It seems like, from posts I have read over the past year or so (while awaiting my horribly delayed move) that the key to settling in is getting involved and meeting folks. For my family, this will probably be primarily through a church setting (since this is a priority for us) and work/school contacts. We aren't going to have family there either, so I'm preparing in advance for new traditions, like at holidays, ect.

Of course, I'm working on my folks to follow us, and their only grandkids, to Raleigh in retirement : )

When discussing moving, dh and I decided that this is it-we simply aren't going to consider 'going back' as an option. Considering the problems we're having getting there in the first place, that makes sense for us.
 
Old 06-02-2008, 07:09 AM
 
Location: Cary, NC
31,621 posts, read 55,349,802 times
Reputation: 30183
11 years ago, my deal with Sweetie was:

"If you ever want/need to move "home," we will do so.
Just let me know."
I mentioned it last month, and I'm good for it, and the fact that she has that option I think helped her relax.

Of course, after 11 years, stipulations have been added.
1. With a 4 wheel drive vehicle.
2. House with a mudroom the size of the 'Canes locker room.

We now call Cary "home." I'm "good for it" still, but sure don't worry about having to go back.

But, we are all different, at different stages in life, with different forces pulling on us.
 
Old 06-02-2008, 07:42 AM
 
Location: Raleigh
1,533 posts, read 5,021,257 times
Reputation: 777
I want to also say good luck with your move back and I also hope your home sells fast for you. I do want to say though I also felt like you many years ago and wanted to go back to CT. It took me about 2 years to stop crying, but honestly I would cry now if I had to go back to CT. I do love it here it just took me awhile to be away from family. Friends I made alot of an fast, but the family part is always hard especially if you have children. Good luck and take care.

Debbie
 
Old 06-02-2008, 09:08 AM
 
9,680 posts, read 23,495,293 times
Reputation: 4122
I guarantee we don't want to return to Jefferson Parish, LA (New Orleans area).
 
Old 06-02-2008, 09:24 AM
 
5,265 posts, read 14,570,274 times
Reputation: 4225
Quote:
Originally Posted by rnc2mbfl View Post
If you find that NC is not for you, then leave. It's simple as that. I don't want to sound harsh but nobody is going to cry as your moving van heads in the opposite direction. There's plenty of people who will come to the Triangle because they truly love it.
Frankly, I don't want people living in my town(s) if they don't want to be there. I want people who want to be where they are because it's those people who are going to move the area forward.
There are two big categories of people who move to the area. They are:
1. People who come and complain that it's deficient and doesn't have what they are used to having. In my opinion, these people can just leave.
2. People who come and see opportunity, possibility and are energized by being a part of rapidly growing dynamic community. These are the people who are going to make the area more than we can currently imagine. Let's welcome these people and their energy with open arms.
There is a LOT of middle ground between those 2 categories you put everyone who moves to the triangle in. Those would be the 2 extremes. Not everyone who moves there and then realizes it's not for them "complains that its deficeant and doesn't have what they want etc. etc. etc....". It's actaully pretty rude to insinuate that everyone who doesn't like living in the triangle or would rather live somehwere else is a "complainer" who should "just leave".
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