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Old 06-01-2008, 10:22 AM
 
Location: Massachusetts
9,487 posts, read 16,380,540 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by West_Raleigh_Guy View Post
Look at the how the original post was written. Something tells me that this is not a real situation, but just something to draw a reaction.
No, I think it is probably a real situation, and my guess is it happens for some quite frequently. NC is beautiful, but for some that moved there from somewhere, it may not be interesting enough. Thats just how it is, Ive heard it alot, its not a reflection so much of the place, it just didn't appeal to them. I hear this alot more with single people than couples. What drives many to leave where they are from is affordability, and the house in NC is a big draw cost wise ,when you live on Long Island. However I doubt they really think how life would be socially, or entertaiment wise in NC or wherever someone moves. They get a culture shock, or whatever happens and there is no family there, it backfires on them, and they seek the familiarity of home. Unfortunately many cannot afford to go home to places like the Northeast and Calif. they are priced out. This type of scenario happens to many people that leave their home and move to another location. Yes it happened to me, and thankfully I learned from the experience so it doesn't happen again.

Last edited by Jimrob1; 06-01-2008 at 10:24 AM.. Reason: spelling.

 
Old 06-01-2008, 12:53 PM
 
3,031 posts, read 9,063,418 times
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I have also learned "you can't go home again". When we left Seattle, it was supposed to be the "five year plan"---East coast for 5 years then back to Seattle for hopefully better bigger jobs, etc.

We left Seattle in 1994. There's no way we could ever afford to go back now.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 01:47 PM
 
5,500 posts, read 10,482,878 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NChomesomeday View Post
I have also learned "you can't go home again". When we left Seattle, it was supposed to be the "five year plan"---East coast for 5 years then back to Seattle for hopefully better bigger jobs, etc.

We left Seattle in 1994. There's no way we could ever afford to go back now.
Well whether people want to admit it or not money is one of the main reasons people move or don't move. My company is trying to convince people to move to the NE to NC or TX. Basically all they talk about is cost of living. When talking to people considering the move money is always the big appeal.

Of course there are other factors but many that I know that have family in the NE would live there if they could afford it.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 02:35 PM
 
245 posts, read 806,999 times
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I'm wondering how much the 13 year old might be influencing the move home! I was certainly capable of wreaking havok at that age... I can't imagine making it easy for my parents if they had dared to move me to a new place!! :-)

Family's a big pull. I myself like having the distance, but another member of my family moved down here, got teary phone calls almost daily from various family members who took their leaving personally, and ended up moving back within 6 months.

Best of luck, and don't look back or beat yourself up over the decision. Any time you take a chance in life, there's a chance it's not the right decision. Better to double back than to never take that chance in the first place.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 02:40 PM
 
9,680 posts, read 27,088,409 times
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I do kind of agree on house prices being the lure.

My late Mom owned a small house in Oceanside, Long island between 1949 and 1970. It was a piece of junk 2BR 1,000SF built to sell for the 1949 VA max of $9,999. This house is still standing. Don't venture the same for NC with the unstable clay soil and many times horrible construction here.

It's now assessed at $275K with property tax of $6K. Add oil heat at almost $4/gallon, and you could easily get a McMansion here with money to spare.

Definite lure in my opinion, but a big house isn't everything.

Leaving family and a fine public transit system including rail might quickly dull the glow of "gee whiz I can be a big shot in NC".

No intention of saying the original poster was thinking that way when moving South, but I bet my shorts quite a few were motivated to come South for that reason.

I'm a Bubba at heart and am happy to now be where I belong.

Last edited by saturnfan; 06-01-2008 at 02:59 PM..
 
Old 06-01-2008, 03:12 PM
 
Location: Cary, NC
8,269 posts, read 25,030,341 times
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I've met quite a few people lately who are "moving back home" and the primary reason has been "to be closer to family". I can't say I blame them! Having a family connection and support system close by is very important some people, especially those with young children and often trumps the benefits of things like lower housing costs. Sometimes moving seems like a good idea, but as we all know, the grass isn't always greeneer. Maybe the thought of a "dream home" sounded like a great great idea, but after uprooting a family, the dreamhome doesn't seem *that* important anymore. Sometimes a drastic life change alters our perspectives and priorities! Good Luck with the move back!

As for the 13 year old, I have one of those too and it's partially the age. She's always bored out of her mind even though I can come up with list of 20 things for her to do if she really wanted to do something!
 
Old 06-01-2008, 03:12 PM
 
Location: North Raleigh
820 posts, read 2,781,476 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeJaquish View Post
Good point, if obliquely made, nodding to freedom of choice.
The OP has that freedom.

If there are not other constraints keeping them here, should we assume that the benefits of our fine area override their reasonable desires?

I think that would be presumptuous of any of us.

I met folks who came to town for 10 months, were as fine a family as you could meet, and within that period of time realized they had made a mistake.
They could have pestered the world with negativity, but just made the decision to move again to where they had been content for many years. No recriminations, just freedom of choice...
Works for me.
I agree with you 100% Mike. Just to play devil's advocate a bit, I think some may be put off because they're wondering what the real point of the original post is.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 08:49 PM
 
5,265 posts, read 16,536,878 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NChomesomeday View Post
I have also learned "you can't go home again". When we left Seattle, it was supposed to be the "five year plan"---East coast for 5 years then back to Seattle for hopefully better bigger jobs, etc.

We left Seattle in 1994. There's no way we could ever afford to go back now.
That's not necessarily true, atleast not for everyone and everywhere. We "came home again" after almost 13 years away. I didn't see it so much as "going back" as I did "getting a second chance" to live at home again. Another poster said that these things shouldn't reflect on the place in question and I agree. It just illustrates the fact that no place is for everyone, and nobody will like every place.

btw don't you live outside of Boston now? Isn't it much more affordable in Seattle than Boston? Just asking.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 09:56 PM
 
3,031 posts, read 9,063,418 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by I'minformed2 View Post
That's not necessarily true, atleast not for everyone and everywhere. We "came home again" after almost 13 years away. I didn't see it so much as "going back" as I did "getting a second chance" to live at home again. Another poster said that these things shouldn't reflect on the place in question and I agree. It just illustrates the fact that no place is for everyone, and nobody will like every place.

btw don't you live outside of Boston now? Isn't it much more affordable in Seattle than Boston? Just asking.
It's not *much* more affordable in Seattle than Boston. I'm not sure exactly how much more affordable it is. The problem is not the affordabilitiy/lack of affordabilty of housing. It's the fact that salaries have not kept pace with inflation in the PNW and that's why we can't go home. If we had stayed where we were, we'd perhaps have moved once--out of the city when the kids started school--and had a very small mortgage. In most industries, you just can't make the same money in Seattle as you can in Boston. You make even less in NC but the net *in pocket* in Boston and NC is greater than in Seattle or Portland.
 
Old 06-01-2008, 11:59 PM
 
Location: Durham, NC
1,232 posts, read 3,770,141 times
Reputation: 604
Quote:
Originally Posted by tlh1005 View Post
I agree with you 100% Mike. Just to play devil's advocate a bit, I think some may be put off because they're wondering what the real point of the original post is.
No matter the validity or point, the truth of the matter is that some who relocate truly find that the grass is not greener for them... even if it's the greenest for those already there. In this case, I think the responses to the OP's post are what drives the point, really.



Quote:
Originally Posted by OCEANSEA View Post
me and my husband and 13 year old daughter moved here to raleigh 7 months ago and bought my dream home,but know we are selling and going back to long island we are home sick!! also there is not much to do here if you have no family,and there is not to much activties to do for my 13 year old daughter.nc is a beautiful state and very clean and very nice people but it aint for us.
You now have perspective, so whatever choice you made to get here, it was a good one to help you understand where you really wanted to be.

Good luck to you and your family, OceanSea. Everything will work out, I'm sure.

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