Lesbian family with a son (Raleigh, Durham: apartment, renting, chapel) - Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill, Cary - North Carolina (NC) -The Triangle Area - City-Data Forum

amoang · 01-20-2009, 08:39 PM

We are looking for an open-minded city to move to with our 2 year old son. Is Raleigh or Durham a gay friendly city, and are there many gay or lesbian families in the area? What neighborhoods would match us well? We aren't looking for a club scene, but for a nice safe place to raise our son with some art and culture. Any help would be much appreciated.

hula · 01-20-2009, 08:49 PM

Durham! Particularly an area known as "Lavender Heights" which is around the 9th street area. There's been several threads on this so as not to repeat alot of the suggestions you might try a search on this topic.

)

chuckreis · 01-20-2009, 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amoang

We are looking for an open-minded city to move to with our 2 year old son. Is Raleigh or Durham a gay friendly city, and are there many gay or lesbian families in the area? What neighborhoods would match us well? We aren't looking for a club scene, but for a nice safe place to raise our son with some art and culture. Any help would be much appreciated.

I would say that Chapel Hill might be a good place to look into. If you want Raleigh I would say the 5 Points area would be good. Durham the Ninth Street and Trinity Park areas.

I would say overall the Metro is very gay friendly, but I am not gay so I cannot speak from experience. The neighborhoods I listed are more liberal and have gay friendly establishments. This is the bible belt and you will encounter those that will turn up their nose at you or give you a snide comment. I got that at an apartment once because I wanted to live there with a girl that was not my wife. The worst I have heard happening was a lesbian couple I know having a neighbor tell them they were going to hell, but that was in a more rural area.

NedB · 01-20-2009, 08:58 PM

Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill and the towns immediately surrounding them should all be fine. I'm not gay, so it's really easy for me to say you'll do fine. Hopefully there is a gay couple or two or more on this forum can respond or at least PM you, but I really think you'll do fine here provided your other reasons/requirements for moving here are satisfied as well.

And even if you happen to end up in a neighborood that turns out to be borderline on the issue, maybe you'll set an example for that neighborhood and open their minds up a bit. I personally don't care whether my neighbor's are gay or straight; so long as they are good neighbors, I'm cool. Whether you are gay or straight, if you're fornicating on your front steps, well, either way I have a problem with that.

As far as art and culture, despite what others have said, I think there is a good amount here (then again I hail from Hartford, CT so you might want to take that with a grain of salt). Durham, particularly, seems to have an arts/culture scene that is not only established but is noticeably growing.

brightmidnight · 01-21-2009, 08:18 AM

Carrboro is the place to be for you. It was the first Southern city to have a gay mayor. That pretty much tells you all you need to know right there.

A10ACE · 01-21-2009, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amoang

We are looking for an open-minded city to move to with our 2 year old son. Is Raleigh or Durham a gay friendly city, and are there many gay or lesbian families in the area? What neighborhoods would match us well? We aren't looking for a club scene, but for a nice safe place to raise our son with some art and culture. Any help would be much appreciated.

This subject has been covered several times, try a search for more opinions. I think you will be ok wherever you choose to stay.

joey2000 · 01-21-2009, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amoang

We are looking for an open-minded city to move to with our 2 year old son. Is Raleigh or Durham a gay friendly city, and are there many gay or lesbian families in the area?

No. At least not from what I gather talking to those who live here and have seen. Asheville is probably your best bet.

Esperanza27713 · 01-21-2009, 09:22 AM

You tell her no?! There are tons of lesbian couples with children in downtown Durham. It's known for it. Like others have said, search the threads and you'll find more information. I don't think you'll go wrong in most urban areas, but if you want to live in a community where there's a strong network of support or likemindedness, I think you should give strong consideration to Durham. Best wishes for a smooth transition, wherever you may land!

Francois · 01-21-2009, 09:24 AM

Any of the main municipalities in the Triangle will be fine: Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill, Cary, Carrboro. Durham in particular seems to be the most Lesbian-centered while Raleigh is more gay male, but really all places have plenty and we blend into the communities just fine, even in the suburbs. Chapel Hill and Carrboro are the most liberal part of the Southeast, practically. Just live your life and don't make a big deal about it and you shouldn't encounter any hassles. I know that there are a lot of gay families in the Englewood/Club Blvd neighborhood (whatever it's called) near Northgate Mall in Durham...but really, we aren't "ghettoized" in this region. You'll find our Community in every neighborhood and no major incidents of resistance. I know a gay male couple with two kids who live in one of the smaller outlying towns, and one of the guys is President of the elementary school PTA!

Here is a web page from NC Pride that was links to several GLBT resources in the area (it's slightly outdated, but most are still around).

danadana · 01-21-2009, 09:50 AM

I think Francois summed it up best. You will find many parts of the triangle are gay friendly. It's more of a live, let live mentality around here. I had neighbors who seemed hesitant to get to know me and my partner. They got past it and we would often have dinners and bbqs together. We kept in mind to live our lives and respect how they lived theirs.

The Club Blvd area is very gay friendly! The houses are cute bungalow styles. I know a teacher at the school. I can tell you, your child would be in very consciencious hands. Trinity park is another area that gets a lot of praise. The Durham magazine had an article talking about the sense of community a lot of the neighbors feel in that area.

The Duke park area is another lesbian friendly community. They are older homes as well. I personally prefer newer homes. All these areas were either fixer upper homes or historic homes out of my price range. I would recommend renting near these areas and getting a feel for the communities.

I am partial to Durham. I see more of a mix of different cultures in this area. I also love the different types of foods I can find in Durham. I do know of a lot of lesbian families who feel comfortable living in the morrisville/cary area. Visit and see what you think. I sent you a DM. I hope it helps.