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There's this guy living right next to my house and he has not smiled or waived at me since April 2008, when we moved in. He is an IT professional working for C*s*o. He isn't an Indian though. He is an American, born and brought up in New York.
I think nowadays people are too busy with their own stuff, their frustrations and their jobs, in this horrible economy. It has nothing to do with anybody's culture.
On the other hand, I've seen tonnes of Americans who always smile at you, say "how are you?" "excuse me", "bless u", "thank u", "**** u" and never participate in blood drives, charity and community events. And I know an Indian colleague of mine, who did a great job working to improve impoverished neighborhoods in Boston. Come on, don't stereotype the hard-working Indian community who makes to the US after a fierce competition in their home country.
Its a shame that we criticize the intelligent Indian community, even after it has invented and patented extensively for us. Come on, give them a break.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jeweloflight
I live in Morrisville, the heart of RTP, and have quite a few neighbors of Indian decent. I am multiracial, pretty open to culture differences, but tell me if I'm wrong on this. As I observe them, and interact with them, they seem not so friendly and pretty separated, sticking socially with their own kind. Even a hint of suspiciousness and mistrust as it relates to "others."
Recently the husband of the family that lives below me, got dropped off after work thru a carpool I think he participates in. I watched him out of the window of my dining room as I was sitting at the computer when he pulled up. As he approached the building, he realized that the back door of their Honda was ajar on the back driver's side. He first peeked in the window of the car, then looked down at the door, and then inside again. I could see he was puzzled as to why it was like that. As he began to adjust the door and get it closed all the way, he started peering up into my window, as if he suspected I had something to do with it. He continued trying to see into my window as he finally approach the building to come inside. I thought, why is looking in here? I didn't mess with his stupid car door. When I got home that afternoon from school, I saw the door ajar, and looked into the window to see if the dome light was on, thinking it may run the battery down, and I should maybe knock on the door and tell his wife. But the light was out, so I thought, fine, don't bother, she'll see it when she leaves again.
Whenever we are outside at the same time, maybe me coming and them going, or vice versa, I look in their direction to catch a glimpse from them to speak and they just ignore me. It's a strange, distance, awkwardness. All of my other neighbors stop and talk at the mailbox, speak, wave, smile, something. I just don't get that "warm and fuzzy" thing from my indian neighbors. My Indians neighbors often have people over, and their guest are always, always, I mean always, all Indian. I never see a mix of races coming to their get-togethers. It's like me having only all black people at every social gathering I have at my home. No mix. Ever. At all. Strange? Or not?
They seem to interact fine at work, because they don't have a choice. I just wonder is it a cultural thing, like say, I wonder how they feel about Americans as a whole? Do they buy into stereotypes about black americans, hispanic americans, or white americans? I work with a girl that is indian, but was born and raised here, although her parents are pretty traditional, and she's great.
I mean, do they really want to be in America? Or are they just here strictly out of necessity? Is it some begrudging, grueling duty to come here and make a better life? I mean, there's always England and Canada.
I just find those that come here straight from India, and weren't raised here, don't make any special effort to befriend those outside their culture. If there is anyone reading this that is Indian, help me understand.... I don't want to make assumptions.
The thread title on the other hand, is offensive. The way it is stated " what's with the Indian culture". Is it just me, or it is like the OP is demeaning the entire Indian culture just by those 5 words. Does no one else feel this?
I agree with the above. Very offensive to me.
To the OP, sure, go judge all Indians with this single family you've encountered. Its not as if I've never encountered rude neighbors and yes, they come from all countries and all facets of life. My neighbor upstairs was rude, played music at all loud hours, never smiled or waved. So, should I throw all Americans in the same boat? My current neighbor invited everyone white over for a Christmas party. Should I say they stick to their own kinds because of this one action?
To the OP, take it as a friendly suggestion - try traveling outside your narrow cocoon. You'll see people are the same everywhere. Man-made boundaries i.e. countries will never change basic human nature. There will be nice friendly people as much as unfriendly mean ones. You'll see this as you travel around. That's what they mean when they say "broaden one's horizon"
Ditto, extremely offensive title. Show some respect, lady....
Quote:
Originally Posted by tpid
I agree with the above. Very offensive to me.
To the OP, sure, go judge all Indians with this single family you've encountered. Its not as if I've never encountered rude neighbors and yes, they come from all countries and all facets of life. My neighbor upstairs was rude, played music at all loud hours, never smiled or waved. So, should I throw all Americans in the same boat? My current neighbor invited everyone white over for a Christmas party. Should I say they stick to their own kinds because of this one action?
To the OP, take it as a friendly suggestion - try traveling outside your narrow cocoon. You'll see people are the same everywhere. Man-made boundaries i.e. countries will never change basic human nature. There will be nice friendly people as much as unfriendly mean ones. You'll see this as you travel around. That's what they mean when they say "broaden one's horizon"
Does anyone even read the followup posts any more? Did you even read past the thread title?
While that may not have been the best choice of words, if you even bother to read the entire post, as well as the one in response to an explanation, you'll see that it was her intent to learn, not to offend. SHEESH people!
Frankly, I am tired of the word "offended". If everyone keeps being offended by every little phrase, thought or word our society will become so narrow minded we will be afraid to say anything at all.
Does anyone even read the followup posts any more? Did you even read past the thread title?
While that may not have been the best choice of words, if you even bother to read the entire post, as well as the one in response to an explanation, you'll see that it was her intent to learn, not to offend. SHEESH people!
I, for one, read the entire thread. Its still offensive to me. Just like some other things are for others for this board when they hear offensive things about NC/South. I don't berate them for finding it offensive. I'm not from here but understand people love this place. The same way, accept that this is offensive to me.
If you want to learn, you come with an open mind and a willingness to accept. One "incident" (notice the quotes) and you cast an entire country into a mold. Yeah, that indicates willingness to learn <sarcasm>
http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u172/iwananashaya/smiley kecil/cop.gif (broken link) As long as posts are within the terms of service guidelines then they are ok .
This isnt the place to discuss what you feel is offensive. Use the back button otherwise
PLEASE LETS GET BACK TO THE ORIGINAL POST
She explains the way her neighbors act towards her, citing several (not just one) incident. These neighbors all happen to be Indian. She's asking if there's something in the Indian culture that would explain their demeanor. She got an excellent explanation. Nothing offensive there.
As I said, the thread could have been titled better. However, I chalk that up to a poor choice of words, not malicious intent.
I have enjoyed this conversation and everyone has made some good points . However, if I had read the thread without any ethnic group being mentioned or if it said "can you guess where I live ?" I would have immediately thought that this person was talking about NYC. That is the way it is there , if you say hello to a neighbor they are suspicious..( hope i didn't offend native New Yorkers)
Has nothing to do with ethnic cultures.. I have neighbors here where I live, who look like me, are Americans like me,go to church like me, go to work like me, etc and have lived next to me and won't say ____ to me, if they had a mouth full of it. Sometimes , people are just the way they are. I do think that it is nice that someone cares enough to ask, rather than spend the rest of their lives being upset with an entire group of people without having a slight look into the whys and wherefores of their actions.
I want to thank everyone that appreciated my explanation.
I also want to extend an invitation to the original poster to have lunch with us. Others are free to join as well.. Maybe this would be good culture sharing experience and an opportunity to discuss, understand, learn each others diverse cultures and possibly develop friendship?
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Offensive OP title
Hand of friendship
