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Old 01-27-2010, 10:02 AM
 
26 posts, read 62,523 times
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I have an 8 yr old son who is very intelligent, but doesn't test extremely well. I have tried to work with his teacher all year to try to find the best approach to ensure that we provide the best environment for him to excel....she at one point mentioned 'some parents like to go treat these behaviours medically... and others behaviourally'. UGH!
He's been doing great (A's and B's) so far this year, until on Friday I received 4 papers with D's on them...when I talked to her at open house last night to ask her if those papers were just recently graded, she said that they were over a two week span of time, but that she'd just sent them home last week. Am I crazy to be perturbed that she never thought to give me a heads up before I received everything at once?

As a side note, I just don't feel very "accepted" here in the JC school systems for events that take place, and I'm wondering if there might be a better outlet that challenges my son, w/o trying to label him and encourages him to excel.
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Old 01-27-2010, 11:13 AM
 
Location: NC
4,529 posts, read 7,073,807 times
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Sorry, I feel your pain, you sound very stressed from it. I can't recommend a charter school but do have a question for you.

Why is the teacher recommending medical or behavorial intervention when your son is a A/B student who only rec'd D's in a two wk period? Doesn't sound like he has issues but something just changed...the better question from the teacher should be, is there something going one at home, is he being bullied at school? Is he getting enough sleep, time to prepare for school, having difficulty with the subject(s), why the sudden drop in grades? Did she come up with a plan for communicating this with you in the future?

If he doesn't test well, can she offer suggestions? But yet he get's A/B's so he's done well so far. it seems early in the game to be leaving the school because of a few D's. Do you want to move him now - this will cause more problems for him, or wait until next school year?

Honestly, I'd go back to the teacher, give her one more chance to communicate with you. And then go to the principal if that doesn't work. The principal and the teacher could then meet with you to come up with a plan. And, maybe monitor the teacher if something is going on there also.

The accepted part - is it that ppl are not friendly to you, stay in their groups? We heard from others that they felt the same in JC..it took them a while to get to know ppl. Are you from NC? Lots of ppl there are from out of state. Or are you of a different race than those there and feel in the minority? I'm sorry you are feeling it from all sides....DM me if you want the scoop on some Raleigh schools, if you'd consider moving.
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Old 01-27-2010, 02:04 PM
 
26 posts, read 62,523 times
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Thanks for resonding and trying to feel what we're going through. I'll respond to your questions here, because I didn't see right off how to DM you on this site.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RaleighLass View Post
Sorry, I feel your pain, you sound very stressed from it. I can't recommend a charter school but do have a question for you.

Why is the teacher recommending medical or behavorial intervention when your son is a A/B student who only rec'd D's in a two wk period? Doesn't sound like he has issues but something just changed...the better question from the teacher should be, is there something going one at home, is he being bullied at school? Is he getting enough sleep, time to prepare for school, having difficulty with the subject(s), why the sudden drop in grades? Did she come up with a plan for communicating this with you in the future?

In the first term of the year, after a long summer vacation with his Dad, my son had a hard time hitting the ground running. So, his grades were kind of sporadic. Mainly, as she put it because he rushed through his work. We (my current husband and I) have really worked hard at giving him additional incentives to help encourage him. One resolution that we concluded with the teacher last term was to provide a list of to-do's during the day..and she said that if he achieved 5 of the 7 then he'd get special treats. so, you know what that started, right? A son who thinks that he doesn't have to give his best, but that if he can get 4 of the 7, maybe that is good enough!??!
He goes to bed at 830 everynight and rises @ 7, so sleep isn't the issue. When I work with him at home on the material, he gets it and is able to explain how to do the work. He also hasn't expressed any thing about bullies or other things that are concerning him. I think our lines of communication are very open. I honestly think that if he thinks he can get away with subpar work he will and that he rushes through things often. If he thinks that he has gotten away with subpar performance, he continues it.

If he doesn't test well, can she offer suggestions? But yet he get's A/B's so he's done well so far. it seems early in the game to be leaving the school because of a few D's. Do you want to move him now - this will cause more problems for him, or wait until next school year?
I wouldn't pull him now, I am just debating on what to do in time for next year.
Honestly, I'd go back to the teacher, give her one more chance to communicate with you. And then go to the principal if that doesn't work. The principal and the teacher could then meet with you to come up with a plan. And, maybe monitor the teacher if something is going on there also.
I have tried to work with the teacher all year long. She does things like gives him retests, but then his score is just the same the 2nd go around...but when I make him go over the work at home (w/o my input) he does significantly better...because he can't get away with poor attempts at home. One concern I have is, why give him a retest w/o giving us the opportunity to talk with him at home to make sure he recognizes the importance of a retest...it almost seems as though the retest is more to cover her than to really give him an oppoortunity to improve...

The accepted part - is it that ppl are not friendly to you, stay in their groups? We heard from others that they felt the same in JC..it took them a while to get to know ppl. Are you from NC? Lots of ppl there are from out of state. Or are you of a different race than those there and feel in the minority? I'm sorry you are feeling it from all sides....DM me if you want the scoop on some Raleigh schools, if you'd consider moving.
No, not from NC. Have been here about 2 years. Seems very click-ish here. I do feel in the minority...and let me tell you, I'm very approachable and not overbearing (sure, anyone can say that, but really, its the truth).
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Old 01-27-2010, 02:27 PM
 
Location: NC
4,529 posts, read 7,073,807 times
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I just sent you a direct message. Go to the top of this page - right side under "Welcome" click on direct message.
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Old 01-27-2010, 06:50 PM
 
1,752 posts, read 3,164,986 times
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Default My two cents...

As a teacher I can say that generally when teachers suspect a child would benefit from medication, they are not just blowing smoke. It sounds like you agree with her that he might be having trouble concentrating during test time.

HOWEVER, and that is a very big however, if she feels intervention of any kind is needed, there should be some sort of school-based intervention process to follow. Wouldn't it make more sense to be getting this opinion from a school psychologist or other professional in the building who has evaluted his needs and abilities based on the teacher's recommendation? Then he would be eligible for modifications (such as going to a quiet room to take the test).

I would put the ball right back in her court and thank her for the info, then ask what the next step in the process will be on the part of the school.

Think of it as an opportunity to help them accomodate his learning style rather than a label.

Personally, I would be annoyed to have to wait two weeks to see a plunge in grades that drastic. In general my kids teachers send tests home to be signed the same day they are taken. Lord knows where they find the time.

I don't like to see the phrase 'My kid doesn't test well'. I feel that teachers have a certain level of responsiblity to make sure the lessons and the method of evaluation suit the learning style of the child. (In which case, your search for a charter/magnet is a good instinct)
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