I know just where you are at. We added a 400 square foot bonus room onto our ranch house (2nd floor was just attic open space) last year and I got quotes that were all over the place. For me, I think the most important thing to do was to establish my own budget for what I could afford before starting down the road of getting quotes, etc. I spent a huge amount of time gaining knowledge of what I could do, what the contractor/builder could do in order to get it within my budget. We had a budget of $13,000 and I did it within that budget. I did save some money doing my own painting, carrying all the building supplies up the stairs, etc. I found that there were things that I could do that did save me money and did not affect the quality of the space.
Above all, know what your budget is so that when you start getting quotes you can figure out what your budget can/cannot afford. I think a big mistake often made is to go into a project blindly and budgetless and end up feeling ripped off in the end.
Also, make sure who you hire is insured. I pulled my own permits and hired everyone who stepped onto my property. I called each and every sub-contractors insurance to make sure they were insured before ever hiring them. Since I pulled my own permit from the county I was liable and so making sure everyone who worked on the project was insured was a huge priority for me.
I spent time ruling out a glut of "contractors" who I knew would not serve me well. I hired the framer(insulation), the electrician, the HVAC company, flooring, and the finisher. I have a well-built quality bonus room that I have no regrets about. Do your homework and don't rush the project and you will too!