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Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill, Cary The Triangle Area
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Old 03-11-2010, 10:30 AM
 
321 posts, read 783,429 times
Reputation: 156

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Get out of the burbs and move near downtown.

Been downtown....no thanks!!
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Old 03-11-2010, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Downtown Raleigh, NC
2,086 posts, read 6,829,175 times
Reputation: 1298
Quote:
Originally Posted by coastalnc View Post
We moved here with a well thought out plan, sober minds and willingness to work hard and we hate it here. We don't find the people particularly friendly at all, not much to do and certainly, if you don't have kids (at least around where we live) people don't want to bother with you. But the career moved us here and we are biding our time until we can move. Just our experience, I know there are people who really like it here. All depends on what you are looking for.....
Sorry you hate it here. So what are you looking for? Hate is a pretty strong word. I think it would help others coming to this thread for useful information to know what exactly you were expecting that you didn't flind.

What kinds of things were you hoping to find to do that there isn't much of? I am kind of confused as to what you want from an area.

Where do you live? If you live in the suburbs around a bunch of families, well, then you will find that most people living around you have kids. From my experience, I've never seen a suburban area in any city that wasn't this way.

I don't have kids, and 90% of my friends don't. I live downtown, but a lot of my friends live in suburban areas. They frequently leave the areas where they live to find people they have something in common with, which usually ends up being downtown!

I hope you find a place that satisfies your needs, but it would be helpful for people to understand where you are coming from when you say that you hate living somewhere.

As for me, this area has lived up to most of my expectations. People are friendlier than where I came from, the weather is well-balanced, there are a lot more affordable things to do in the area, there are plenty of mini-vacation spots within a reasonable drive, life in general is slightly more affordable, the general attitude of people is definitely less pretentious and more open, and I've met a lot of great people.
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Old 03-11-2010, 03:05 PM
 
5,265 posts, read 14,616,874 times
Reputation: 4225
I'm sure coastalnc doesn't really "hate" the triangle. I've said I "hate" living there many times towards the end of my time there when we were ready to move but weren't able to just yet. It's just stressful when you are in a place you don't want to live anymore. AND I must say, though it may be petty, it's also more irritating when you consistently see and hear so many people get so hyped up over it and think you are crazy for not wanting to live there. After the fact, looking back, we enjoyed the years we spend down there and definitely don't feel any animosity towards the triangle or "hate it". But I think strong emotions and strong opinions by ones-self and the people around them who disagree can just make them say or feel stronger negative things about a place they don't feel is a good fit for them anymore.
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Old 03-11-2010, 06:26 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
306 posts, read 356,002 times
Reputation: 628
Default Expectations

These types of threads are much more productive than the standard likes and dislikes lists that people reveal. Everyone is diifferent and we all have different preferences.

It is interesting that most research links happiness directly to an individual's expectations.

Raleigh seems to be a place that was held in such high esteem via the media from 2004-2007 or so that people have had some really lofty expectations.

Personally, I like Raleigh.

Expect a BMW, get an Accord, unhappy.

Expect an Accord, get an Accord, happy.

Expect a Yugo, get an Accord, very happy.

Cheers.
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Old 03-11-2010, 08:10 PM
 
122 posts, read 247,176 times
Reputation: 89
I moved here without too many expectations. My husband lost his job and had an opportunity here. After a pretty horrendous winter in IA when my husband asked if I would relocate to NC, without any hesitation, I said yes. In hindsight, I wish I would have explored it more before we moved here because I never would have moved here if we had. I've lived my whole life in the midwest, born and raised in WI, then the last 13 yrs. in IA before moving here last fall.

I naively thought that people would be friendly here, that there wouldn't be trash all over the roadsides, other paradigms too. I grossly underestimated how much traffic there would be. Granted there is zero traffic in IA but the traffic here just sucks. The winter was bad here too. I know it doesn't compare to the midwest but its still cold and dark and dreary. I haven't experienced the full effect of summer yet as I didn't arrive here until the end of August and I was dying then, so I'm very worried about surviving the heat.

It took me 5 months to find a job here (scientific research) and I took a 50% pay cut. That hurts. But there are many people out of work, so even with the pay cut I feel fortunate.

I do think the locals do not like outsiders and I don't like feeling like an outsider one bit. I will not stay here forever, I want to move back to either WI or IA. The problem is that my husband who grew up split between FL and NJ simply loves it here. He loves everything about it. He seems to be in love with Durham big time. It seems like people who move here from the Northeast love it here, I guess the traffic is much less here than what they are used to, even though for me coming from IA, its a lot more.

By moving here, I've compromised my lifestyle more than I ever realized I would. Its too densely populated here for my liking. As soon as I get my plan together I'd like to be outta here.
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Old 03-11-2010, 08:18 PM
 
Location: Western NY
24 posts, read 38,987 times
Reputation: 15
We are researching too, and wouldn't move without a job lined up. The only thing I'm escaping is the winter weather in Rochester! If I have to shovel snow and scrape my car off while below zero winds are whipping at my face for another winter, then I might need mood altering meds!: )
Thanks again for all the info about relocating on previous threads!
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Old 03-11-2010, 08:50 PM
 
Location: between here and there
1,030 posts, read 2,712,660 times
Reputation: 934
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grizzmeister View Post
Sorry… didn’t mean to sound holier-than-thou but it just amazes me how so many people consider relocating here the answer to all their personal problems. If someone moves to the Raleigh area with a well thought out plan, a sober mind and a willingness to work hard then the Triangle can be a wonderful experience but if the move is seen as an escape then the potential relocator is on the short road to ruin.

Aside from mandatory job transfers (as in "you move or don't have a job"), most moves are rooted in negative aspects of one's present location be it weather, failed job prospects, sour personal relationships, sinking finances...added to the fact Raleigh has been heralded as the Utopia of the South and you have virtual overload of the area's representation...
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Old 03-11-2010, 08:50 PM
 
5,265 posts, read 14,616,874 times
Reputation: 4225
Quote:
Originally Posted by tjm1013 View Post
We are researching too, and wouldn't move without a job lined up. The only thing I'm escaping is the winter weather in Rochester! If I have to shovel snow and scrape my car off while below zero winds are whipping at my face for another winter, then I might need mood altering meds!: )
Thanks again for all the info about relocating on previous threads!
Hey now...it was 60 degrees here in Rochester today!
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Old 03-11-2010, 10:26 PM
 
9,558 posts, read 26,514,363 times
Reputation: 9680
Quote:
Originally Posted by IAPonyGirl View Post
I moved here without too many expectations. My husband lost his job and had an opportunity here. After a pretty horrendous winter in IA when my husband asked if I would relocate to NC, without any hesitation, I said yes. In hindsight, I wish I would have explored it more before we moved here because I never would have moved here if we had. I've lived my whole life in the midwest, born and raised in WI, then the last 13 yrs. in IA before moving here last fall.

I naively thought that people would be friendly here, that there wouldn't be trash all over the roadsides, other paradigms too. I grossly underestimated how much traffic there would be. Granted there is zero traffic in IA but the traffic here just sucks. The winter was bad here too. I know it doesn't compare to the midwest but its still cold and dark and dreary. I haven't experienced the full effect of summer yet as I didn't arrive here until the end of August and I was dying then, so I'm very worried about surviving the heat.

It took me 5 months to find a job here (scientific research) and I took a 50% pay cut. That hurts. But there are many people out of work, so even with the pay cut I feel fortunate.

I do think the locals do not like outsiders and I don't like feeling like an outsider one bit. I will not stay here forever, I want to move back to either WI or IA. The problem is that my husband who grew up split between FL and NJ simply loves it here. He loves everything about it. He seems to be in love with Durham big time. It seems like people who move here from the Northeast love it here, I guess the traffic is much less here than what they are used to, even though for me coming from IA, its a lot more.

By moving here, I've compromised my lifestyle more than I ever realized I would. Its too densely populated here for my liking. As soon as I get my plan together I'd like to be outta here.
IAPONYGIRL,

I thought you stated in a previous post you live in Creedmoor.

It's hard to know what you are refering to when you are saying "here" since Creedmoor isn't part of the Triangle. IMO, life in Creedmoor isn't very representative of what it is like to live in the Triangle.
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Old 03-11-2010, 11:50 PM
 
6,186 posts, read 13,906,902 times
Reputation: 4457
I think newcomers may feel more like outsiders in smaller towns, but certainly not in the Triangle (or the smaller towns closest to the Triangle).

I came here with absolutely no expectations whatsoever. I didn't have a clue as to what I was getting into. My long-term employment contract was ending, and I needed a plan. A TV news director at a party in Rochester told me that if he had the opportunity, he would go to Raleigh. That one little suggestion is what started it all. It was just like in The Graduate movie, and the main character, Ben, at a party, was told the future was "Plastics." Six months later, I was living in Raleigh. Sadly, the news director died of a brain tumor and was never able to realize his dream.


YouTube - Plastics is the Future
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