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Old 07-23-2012, 12:11 PM
 
1,035 posts, read 1,555,805 times
Reputation: 2154

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I'm still in the midst of trying to buy my first home and the process has been discouraging but not really for the reasons a lot of first time buyers say like that it took a long time to find a property or that there was so much paperwork or so many lending issues and guidelines etc. All of the stress and time, I was prepared for.

What's been bugging me is that throughout this process, no matter which real estate-related professionals I've been dealing with, mostly agents and lawyers, I feel like I've been treated like I don't know what I want and don't know anything about real estate just because I'm a first time buyer so I should just sit there and let everyone else handle everything and make decisions for me.

And whenever I try to be involved in the finer details of the process and ask to see certain documents or about certain laws they allude to while talking about my situation or whatever else that's relevant to me, they all give me this you don't need to worry about it attitude and there's this resistance to just giving me access to the things I ask for.

And it's not just one random person, it's everyone I've been dealing with throughout this process for the past two years. When I came on this site, one thing I noticed when many first timers are upset about how something went down and want to know what recourse they have against whichever parties, so often, the response given to them is, "Um, it's your responsibility to verify this or ask for that or keep tabs on whatever, not the agent's/lawyer's/broker's. You're the one buying a property".

But after my experiences, I'm starting to wonder, what if a lot of these people were dealing with what I feel like I'm dealing with where they try to stay informed and try to make sure everything is happening the way it should be and try to voice their concerns but the pros handling things just keep steamrolling them with their expertise and experience and assurances that they know what they're doing and they know what you do or don't need to worry about or access or know?

I can imagine that some of them might just get sick of arguing or demanding and just concede and place their trust in these people because maybe that's just what the process is like and I can't think of how angry I'd be if something didn't work out and those very same pros just shrugged and said, "Well, maybe you should have been a little more involved."

And maybe some people can't or are afraid to switch agents and lawyers every time they feel like they're not being heard or kept informed, especially if they're already deep in the middle of a purchase. This can all be overwhelming and it just seems that the people who are supposed to be there for you don't want to be bothered with your concerns if they don't share them, then want to point the finger at you if something iffy happens and you didn't catch it expecting the pros to do what they said they'd do and be your guide.

Is this a common treatment/attitude when it comes to first time homebuyers? Do real estate professionals have a habit of dragging you along rather than leading you, expecting you to trust their years of experience and their abilities and just go with things or devaluing your opinion or your wants because you've never bought a house before?

Or am I just the lucky one? lol
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Old 07-23-2012, 12:30 PM
 
Location: Salem, OR
13,740 posts, read 31,550,338 times
Reputation: 12105
How many buyer agents did you interview before you picked your current agent?
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Old 07-23-2012, 12:40 PM
 
1,035 posts, read 1,555,805 times
Reputation: 2154
I think it was six before finally picking one. Then I ended up going with another after she ended up flaking (turned out she took me on right when she was deciding to make a career change she failed to mention...) and the one I'm with now is the one I've been with for about half a year and I also work with his partner. My lawyer is only the second lawyer.

But it's not only them, it's even other agents and lawyers they interact with or that I encounter and ask for advice or for second or third opinions on things or for information. It's one of the reasons why I started coming to message boards like this one lol And the attitude was the same with even the ones I interviewed though I didn't like their personalities and it all seemed to be stemming from the fact that I'm a first time buyer, not just that I'm a buyer.
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Old 07-23-2012, 12:46 PM
 
Location: Salem, OR
13,740 posts, read 31,550,338 times
Reputation: 12105
Well some agents don't do well with clients that ask a lot of questions as they feel you are questioning their competence and they get defensive. It is hard to say what the issue is. You might have a bad people picker. You might not be asking the right questions. Agents might view you as a waste of time. You might be asking your questions in an arrogant manner. I don't know.

What state are you in? We don't use attorneys on the west coast, so I'm assuming you are back east somewhere.
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:02 PM
 
Location: Columbia, SC
8,844 posts, read 17,437,561 times
Reputation: 6194
I'm with Silverfall. W/o knowing details it's kind of difficult to comment either way.
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:03 PM
 
49 posts, read 42,561 times
Reputation: 89
Never trust anyone, especially a broker, and always do your own due diligence. It can and will save you thousands of dollars. Of course they're holding your hand becuase they want to close a sale. That is all they care about. They will sugar coat a crap and call it candy if it will get you to close on a property. And of course they will say it was your fault afterword because they know it they made the promises but if they guilt you enough you won't pursue the issue. Full disclosure is their responsibility. People don't realize that no one will ever look out for your best interest except you.

However, It sounds like you are on the right track by educating yourself on the whole process and i commend you on that. What you are doing is something that every home buyer should do but they don't because they trust these 'professionals' and think the market is efficient. Prices are going down and anyone who buys at or near list price now is more than likely going to take a hit, especially something like new construction or heavily marketed properties. That cost is in there somewhere.

A sucker is born every minute and, if they weren't, brokers would be out of a job it. Remember, it takes nothing to become a real estate broker, why do you think half of them are divorced housewives, senile old farts or middle aged schemers? Trust no one and low ball everything.
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:12 PM
 
Location: Columbia, SC
8,844 posts, read 17,437,561 times
Reputation: 6194
Quote:
Originally Posted by liquidicevapor View Post
Never trust anyone, especially a broker, and always do your own due diligence. It can and will save you thousands of dollars. Of course they're holding your hand becuase they want to close a sale. That is all they care about. They will sugar coat a crap and call it candy if it will get you to close on a property. And of course they will say it was your fault afterword because they know it they made the promises but if they guilt you enough you won't pursue the issue. Full disclosure is their responsibility. People don't realize that no one will ever look out for your best interest except you.

However, It sounds like you are on the right track by educating yourself on the whole process and i commend you on that. What you are doing is something that every home buyer should do but they don't because they trust these 'professionals' and think the market is efficient. Prices are going down and anyone who buys at or near list price now is more than likely going to take a hit, especially something like new construction or heavily marketed properties. That cost is in there somewhere.

A sucker is born every minute and, if they weren't, brokers would be out of a job it. Remember, it takes nothing to become a real estate broker, why do you think half of them are divorced housewives, senile old farts or middle aged schemers? Trust no one and low ball everything.
Quit being stupid. You're giving all sorts of bad advice and some people might believe you. There are good and bad brokers out there and people just need to do a better job of hiring. If you want to rant do so about the buyers/sellers who don't do any due diligence when it comes to hiring an agent. That would get the bad ones out the biz. Hell, someone forgot to tell me how to act I guess. I just told my client that's negotiating on the price if they pay what the seller is asking they are overpaying and IMO it may be best to walk away and keep looking. But hey, I'm just some petty thief with my own best interests in mind according to you. I should be out there tricking that buyer into purchasing the first bad deal they run across, right?

Seriously, there are some nuggets of truth in your post. Buyers should do their own research and be educated. They should do their own diligence if they have reason to. But your post is the dumbest thing as a whole I've read today.
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:25 PM
 
8,287 posts, read 11,473,129 times
Reputation: 4938
^ Really? It takes nothing to become a real estate broker or agent? For the ones who are succesfull like me who have been in the busuiness for 17 years now it takes a lot of dedication , patience and education.
Cyberphonics has trust issues since he interviewed 6 agents before settling on one which is ok since you have to be comfortable with such a deciscion.
Seeing as if I am paid on Commission what is wrong with wanting to get paid? I work with clients who are serious about buying and know what they are looking for. Sorry for being crass but you are not going to waste 6 months of my time while you are using other agents at the same time!
Trust is a two way street!
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:27 PM
 
49 posts, read 42,561 times
Reputation: 89
Where is there bad advice at all in my post? There isn't. You do have your own best interests at heart. It would be lying to say you didn't.

Buyers should ALWAYS do their own due diligence.
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Old 07-23-2012, 01:38 PM
 
8,287 posts, read 11,473,129 times
Reputation: 4938
Quote:
Originally Posted by liquidicevapor View Post
Where is there bad advice at all in my post? There isn't. You do have your own best interests at heart. It would be lying to say you didn't.

Buyers should ALWAYS do their own due diligence.
I also have my client's interest at heart as well. You don't survive in the "sales" business by scamming or ripping off people. There is a saying that bears out my philosphy and my broker taught to take to heart.
" Take care of your customers and they will take care of you" and anybody who is succesfull in real estate
knows that the best way to survive is through "word of mouth" recommendations.
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