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I guess it's not customary there, but it is common sense to know where the party enters and what will happens as you walk down the aisle, that's what I would have told them had they responded so rudely. If it's a holy sacrament it shouldn't be impromptu like the beginning of a Benny Hill show.
What I found out is weddings happen all the time in the small village as they have for hundreds of years.... it always starts at the church and the reception is either a few steps to the right or a few steps to the left depending on if it will be a the small or large Inn/Tavern.
I think the word Rehearsal is what set people off combined with me being from California...
I would say as Austria is a Catholic Country with the cross in every public school room and the villages are close knit... I was the only one that didn't know the program... as mentioned... anyone that wants to attend the marriage and/or the reception is invited... the marriage is announced on several Sunday's ahead in church...
Now the California weddings I have attended vary so much... no way to really be on the same page... last one was in a meadow at the Ahwahnee in Yosemite with reception in front of a roaring fire in the lodge... just happens there was an invited couple from Austria and they didn't have a clue... never occurred to them a wedding would take place anywhere but in a church.
I can really see how keeping the bridal couple's expenses down and still having a wedding of maybe 400 people can go a long way not to start out in debt...
One of the presents the young couple received from his friends was a new Cement Mixer... apparently, you can't build a house without one over there!
The tradition makes is possible for low or modest income couples to own/build their own homes over a period of years...
As with most things... there are expensive and budget alternatives...
No, it won't own me, I will own it. At $420 I will be able to make a few extra payments a year and save for a roof and that's without a roommate. My credit score is over 800, I pay my bills, I do without and know how to get by and make ends meet. You must be thinking of how you spend money and how it would own you in the same situation.
The problem is that you and several others in this thread have seemed to celebrate lifestyles where, yes, the house does own you. Whether that's working 18 hours a day, both on a paying job and on making repairs to the house, or doing without so that you can pay for the house, etc, you're discussing scenarios where the house owns you. Perhaps that lifestyle works for some people. Other people might find it unacceptable to miss their kid's childhood, or decrease their lifespan with poor diets, sleep or overwork. This doesn't make anyone unmotivated and it definitely doesn't make you or others like you better than others. It means that priorities are different. Some parents want to actually parent their children, some want to own a home. Others want a home to own them and are fine with that.
The problem is that you and several others in this thread have seemed to celebrate lifestyles where, yes, the house does own you. Whether that's working 18 hours a day, both on a paying job and on making repairs to the house, or doing without so that you can pay for the house, etc, you're discussing scenarios where the house owns you. Perhaps that lifestyle works for some people. Other people might find it unacceptable to miss their kid's childhood, or decrease their lifespan with poor diets, sleep or overwork. This doesn't make anyone unmotivated and it definitely doesn't make you or others like you better than others. It means that priorities are different. Some parents want to actually parent their children, some want to own a home. Others want a home to own them and are fine with that.
Unless so954 has a force field around their life there is a very good chance life will happen eventually. All those savings plans go out the window only making $10/hr. These people that try to own a home making little to nothing usually do so in detriment to their health. They are working unbelievable hours of overtime or several jobs. Their emergency fund is a Master Card, Visa or American Express. When I made $9/hr I was renting an 2 bedroom apartment for $500/month. With one child to feed my wife and I made it, but barely. My wife coupons like crazy and did so back then. I don't see how would could have made it otherwise. We did all this WITHOUT any government programs or assistance.
As a Landlord I am grateful people choose to rent... without renters there would be no rental business.
An elderly woman in her 90's still lives in the home she and her husband bought in Alameda CA just after they married 70 years ago... an old 1890 Victorian...
Yes... she and her home are inseparable... she also has told me take care of your home and it will take care of you...
In WWII they made 3 small basement apartments to house Nave workers... to this day they have always been rented and two of her three tenants have been there for years like her children... they look out for her, pick up groceries and such. Her husband died in a car crash 60 years ago and it was owning the home that kept her going... gave her purpose and income... it is on the Historic register...
Again... no one forces anyone to buy or rent... it's a choice that seems to have some renters feeling uneasy... like they are missing out or feeling pressure to own just because... tune out the noise.
You sure do a lot of assuming, don't you? I had a $700/month payment on the house I had already bought plus almost $250 of commute costs every month and a car payment. Do you seriously think I was eating out for lunch? Most of the time I didn't even eat lunch, in fact, all I had to eat for the last couple of days before I got paid was pancakes. And I didn't have a crock pot at the time. I couldn't afford one.
You make me laugh talking about buying another place closer to where I worked. Dude, the house I paid $85,000 for would have cost me over $350,000 "closer to work". Hello, it was why I was living in the boonies to begin with.
But for your education, yes, I loved living in the boonies. I knew what the commute would be before I bought my house, but I was only working 3 12-hour days at the time and that was a doable schedule for me. Almost as soon as I signed on the dotted line, however, the building my job was in was torn down to make way for the new WAMU building and all the employees were farmed out to other stores. The new store I was at promptly switched me over to 5 8-hour days.
I wanted to keep my house, so I did that commute for a year. You want to know what's funny? I have you here telling me if I had motivation, I would have quit my job and found a new one. The last person I told about this thought I lacked motivation because I did quit my job. He said if I really wanted to, I would have stayed at that job, put up with the commute, and kept the house. Jesus have mercy, no matter what you do, someone is going to witch about it. You can't win.
But yes, I did quit that job and looked for another one closer to home. It took me 3 months to get one that paid a decent amount and by then I was behind on the payments for my house, so I sold it. I was in over my head anyway and I knew it.
What I'm trying to point out is, sometimes people get caught in things and they can't just jump out on a whim. You don't go buy a house or move to a cheaper area or look for a new job just like that, not if you're smart. It takes planning. Sometimes it's taking a risk and hoping you make the right choice. Sometimes no matter what you do, things happen and you get stuck anyway, even if you make the "right" decision. Larry, if you're someone who's never made a mistake in your life, well, more power to you. Still doesn't mean you get to look down your nose at people who did and judge them by what you think they should have done. Because you don't know that your decisions would have turned out any better for them.
Your comments so far have been very misleading. You are complaining about your life in a thread about how to do low income home ownership, when you already own a home. You should be bragging, not whining.
I also didn't tell you to quit your job. You claimed that your job/commute was the problem, so I suggested you change the commute. I also didn't suggest you buy a comparable house, I suggested you buy the house nobody else wants and then fix it up. From your comments, I had assumed you were renting.
Last edited by Larry Caldwell; 12-01-2015 at 01:16 PM..
Certainly there are times when home ownership is not a good idea. A career that requires you to move frequently pretty much takes home ownership out of the picture. Being low income and crippled means you will be unable to do your own home upgrades and repairs. You certainly won't be able to pay someone else to do them.
That said, I am astonished by the comments about a house "owning" you. I'm sitting in a lovely, completely remodeled home on acreage, and don't owe a penny. It has been paid off since August of 2008. Yes, I gave up many movies, restaurant dinners, pretty cars and weekends to get here. I did a roof tear-off, re-sheathe and re-roof myself. I installed insulation myself. I replaced the windows myself. When I converted from an electric furnace to a heat pump I had to install a new electrical service. When I got bids they were in the neighborhood of $3500, so I picked the best contractor I could find and told them to send one guy time and materials with everything he would need. I had everything opened up for him, the work area completely clear, crawled the crawl space and hauled trash for him. It cost me $840. The parts actually cost more than the labor. It was money well spent, and he showed me some electrician tricks I didn't know.
As for parenting your kids, at least their parents don't disappear every day to some nebulous "job." They get to see someone actually doing something creative for the family. They get to learn how things go together. When they are teenagers they get to learn how to do basic maintenance on their vehicles, and that what you see is not necessarily what you get. You can buy them a car that is mechanically sound with a bad paint job, do a little bondo work and give it a $500 Maaco paint job. Bingo, they have a classy looking car to drive without spending thousands of dollars. The alternative is a teenager who disappears into their bedroom to play video games. Who do you think is the better parent?
We have a generation with no skills, that has been force-fed everything. They are mentally and physically lazy. If you don't know how to do something, get a 15 volume "How To Do It" encyclopedia or look it up on the internet. If your car needs work, buy a Haynes or Chilton's manual and read it. Plan your work, then work your plan. Don't turn on the TV or computer, then complain that you can't do anything. The problem is not life, the problem is what's in the mirror.
As for parenting your kids, at least their parents don't disappear every day to some nebulous "job." They get to see someone actually doing something creative for the family. They get to learn how things go together. When they are teenagers they get to learn how to do basic maintenance on their vehicles, and that what you see is not necessarily what you get. You can buy them a car that is mechanically sound with a bad paint job, do a little bondo work and give it a $500 Maaco paint job. Bingo, they have a classy looking car to drive without spending thousands of dollars. The alternative is a teenager who disappears into their bedroom to play video games. Who do you think is the better parent?
Certainly you can see that this scenario you have described is much different than the ones I referenced. You're discussing being home with your family whereas several others were high-fiving themselves over the fact that they spend their waking hours away from home working in order to afford the house and maintenance, perhaps renting out the second bedroom (in a 2 bedroom house, I might add), shrugging off missing dinner with the kids because "the kids won't be bothered".
Spending a few hours a weekend, maybe more in special cases, working on the house is so obviously very different. Further, foregoing certain luxuries like going to the movies or Disneyland vacations or the newest ipad isn't the same thing as giving up everything save for food and the absolute basics in order for the 'privilege' of owning something you call a home.
Btw, I don't think anyone is the better parent just because they teach their children something different. Those parents who aren't parenting because they allow the home to own them are totally different issues.
I get the sense that all these people who jump in with " but I own a home and it's great" don't actually understand the concept of low income and don't even seem to realize they are middle class.
Certainly there are times when home ownership is not a good idea. A career that requires you to move frequently pretty much takes home ownership out of the picture. Being low income and crippled means you will be unable to do your own home upgrades and repairs. You certainly won't be able to pay someone else to do them.
That said, I am astonished by the comments about a house "owning" you. I'm sitting in a lovely, completely remodeled home on acreage, and don't owe a penny. It has been paid off since August of 2008. Yes, I gave up many movies, restaurant dinners, pretty cars and weekends to get here. I did a roof tear-off, re-sheathe and re-roof myself. I installed insulation myself. I replaced the windows myself. When I converted from an electric furnace to a heat pump I had to install a new electrical service. When I got bids they were in the neighborhood of $3500, so I picked the best contractor I could find and told them to send one guy time and materials with everything he would need. I had everything opened up for him, the work area completely clear, crawled the crawl space and hauled trash for him. It cost me $840. The parts actually cost more than the labor. It was money well spent, and he showed me some electrician tricks I didn't know.
As for parenting your kids, at least their parents don't disappear every day to some nebulous "job." They get to see someone actually doing something creative for the family. They get to learn how things go together. When they are teenagers they get to learn how to do basic maintenance on their vehicles, and that what you see is not necessarily what you get. You can buy them a car that is mechanically sound with a bad paint job, do a little bondo work and give it a $500 Maaco paint job. Bingo, they have a classy looking car to drive without spending thousands of dollars. The alternative is a teenager who disappears into their bedroom to play video games. Who do you think is the better parent?
We have a generation with no skills, that has been force-fed everything. They are mentally and physically lazy. If you don't know how to do something, get a 15 volume "How To Do It" encyclopedia or look it up on the internet. If your car needs work, buy a Haynes or Chilton's manual and read it. Plan your work, then work your plan. Don't turn on the TV or computer, then complain that you can't do anything. The problem is not life, the problem is what's in the mirror.
You are looking at the glass half full!
Being low income and crippled means you will be unable to do your own home upgrades and repairs. You certainly won't be able to pay someone else to do them.
I traded my smarts solving the workers problems for work i had done. I had a truck and provided transportation but they paid the gas! Same as i said before you have to made it a WIN/WIN SITUATION.
The carpenter inherited a nice van that had a title problem. i used my phone skills to get it solved. 10 minutes on the phone knowing what to ask, how to ask it, and when to ask solved his problem and that just the same as put 6 grand in his pocket.
Certainly there are times when home ownership is not a good idea. A career that requires you to move frequently pretty much takes home ownership out of the picture. Being low income and crippled means you will be unable to do your own home upgrades and repairs. You certainly won't be able to pay someone else to do them.
That said, I am astonished by the comments about a house "owning" you. I'm sitting in a lovely, completely remodeled home on acreage, and don't owe a penny. It has been paid off since August of 2008. Yes, I gave up many movies, restaurant dinners, pretty cars and weekends to get here. I did a roof tear-off, re-sheathe and re-roof myself. I installed insulation myself. I replaced the windows myself. When I converted from an electric furnace to a heat pump I had to install a new electrical service. When I got bids they were in the neighborhood of $3500, so I picked the best contractor I could find and told them to send one guy time and materials with everything he would need. I had everything opened up for him, the work area completely clear, crawled the crawl space and hauled trash for him. It cost me $840. The parts actually cost more than the labor. It was money well spent, and he showed me some electrician tricks I didn't know.
As for parenting your kids, at least their parents don't disappear every day to some nebulous "job." They get to see someone actually doing something creative for the family. They get to learn how things go together. When they are teenagers they get to learn how to do basic maintenance on their vehicles, and that what you see is not necessarily what you get. You can buy them a car that is mechanically sound with a bad paint job, do a little bondo work and give it a $500 Maaco paint job. Bingo, they have a classy looking car to drive without spending thousands of dollars. The alternative is a teenager who disappears into their bedroom to play video games. Who do you think is the better parent?
We have a generation with no skills, that has been force-fed everything. They are mentally and physically lazy. If you don't know how to do something, get a 15 volume "How To Do It" encyclopedia or look it up on the internet. If your car needs work, buy a Haynes or Chilton's manual and read it. Plan your work, then work your plan. Don't turn on the TV or computer, then complain that you can't do anything. The problem is not life, the problem is what's in the mirror.
I totally agree with you on this!
We have a generation with no skills, that has been force-fed everything. They are mentally and physically lazy. If you don't know how to do something, get a 15 volume "How To Do It" encyclopedia or look it up on the internet. If your car needs work, buy a Haynes or Chilton's manual and read it. Plan your work, then work your plan. Don't turn on the TV or computer, then complain that you can't do anything. The problem is not life, the problem is what's in the mirror.[/quote]
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