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Old 01-27-2018, 01:26 AM
 
9,077 posts, read 5,405,841 times
Reputation: 5974

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dad01 View Post
I'm ready but I dont like the idea to be burdened with running the ENTIRE HOUSEHOLD and plus having the commitment of an expensive house while all she does is make payment for a condo which she can barely afford on her salary

I don't get it. With your salary of $150k, you should be able to afford a $300k house without breaking a sweat. Just purely guessing here, but assuming you put down 20%; mortgage, property tax, insurance, utilities, and electricity comes out to $1,900-$2,000 / month. Your take home pay should be about $8,000/month. That's well within your budget, you should not need your baby momma's help. Maybe there are student loans or other debt that clouds the equation?

Her condo is rented which means she has monthly rental income to supplement her mortgage. Just based on the price point of her condo, the monthly rent should be enough to cover mortgage or at least pay for a large portion of it. Her condo shouldn't be eating away much of her salary.

Which means, the two of you are more than rich enough to afford a $300k house, even with a kid (and I know that can be expensive). In the event she dashes off, you are capable of paying for the house on your own. Not to mention, you can always just sell it and goes back to renting.

Speaking of renting, a comparable 3 bedroom 2 bath house likely will run you around $2,000 anyway. So, if you are already paying a similar amount each month for rent, what's the difference?

If the point is, "I am not sure about buying a house with this girl." I get it.

But if the point is, "I can't afford the house if she runs away." Then I don't get it.
.
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Old 01-27-2018, 01:37 AM
 
Location: Cary, NC
31,595 posts, read 55,320,924 times
Reputation: 30150
OP:
Don't be coaxed into buying.

Buy when YOU want to buy.
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Old 01-27-2018, 07:00 AM
 
Location: Illinois USA
291 posts, read 147,761 times
Reputation: 211
Quote:
Is your name on the deed of the condo as co-owner?
entirely in her name
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Old 01-27-2018, 07:06 AM
 
Location: Illinois USA
291 posts, read 147,761 times
Reputation: 211
Quote:
I don't get it. With your salary of $150k, you should be able to afford a $300k house without breaking a sweat. Just purely guessing here, but assuming you put down 20%; mortgage, property tax, insurance, utilities, and electricity comes out to $1,900-$2,000 / month. Your take home pay should be about $8,000/month. That's well within your budget, you should not need your baby momma's help. Maybe there are student loans or other debt that clouds the equation?
I grew up in a very expensive house in a great area but our family was always house poor , I over compensate for that I think.

its more a case of

I think a 300k house is an unneccassary expense
huge commitment of time
IL 's situation is precarious ( as mentioned above),investing in a house here does not seem like a great idea unless you are someone who is very street smart

I think I can make a better investment BY NOT BUYING A HOUSE
as I will have
1- more time for my son
2-more time to spend on my health
3-more time to work and earn more money
4-less taxes and maintainence costs

the key is to find relatively affordable rent and I'm prepared to live in a place further out in the burbs/country as long as its safe and schools are good

what do you think ?

she has some loans not a lot but I dont thanks to my late father God bless his soul

Last edited by Dad01; 01-27-2018 at 07:14 AM..
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Old 01-27-2018, 08:21 AM
 
917 posts, read 403,332 times
Reputation: 2270
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dad01 View Post
exactly plus I want her to make sure she sells her condo first before we purchase a house togather

makes me nervous to have 2 properties esp in a climate that can be uncertain given the law n order situation of chicago
I agree she needs to sell the condo first. And then itís up to you two to figure out if the cost benefit analysis for your situation makes renting or owning make more sense. It really depends on the area and situation. If youíre staying shorter term you should rent, buying almost never makes sense in the >3 year category. Remember too, that the property taxes in Chicago are murserously awful. You wonít be able to avoid those whether you rent or buy, but it can make selling real estate go even slower because people are reluctant to buy in the highest tax areas.

Take emotion out of it and chart up your benefits and drawbacks in each category. Then decide from there. If itís close to even between the two options, go with the one that gives you more long term flexibility (renting). Home ownership is very much a lifestyle choice and comes with a lot of additional responsibility and baggage, so if youíre at all unsure Iíd advise against it. But make no decisions without first honestly laying out the situation for yourself to evaluate.
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Old 01-27-2018, 10:10 AM
 
Location: Henderson, NV
819 posts, read 484,030 times
Reputation: 2217
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dad01 View Post
so we cannot find any common ground
The kid is your "common ground". Start there. Not about buy or rent. Stable home life. Safe neighborhood where junior can play at the park and ride a bike. Good schools where junior can flourish. Both of you can work together to make junior a safe and secure home, but outside the door matters just as much.

Your decision can be made using any criteria you choose. Finances are a significant factor, but not always the most important. Good luck.
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Old 01-27-2018, 10:44 AM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
26,847 posts, read 57,874,473 times
Reputation: 29261
Quote:
Originally Posted by WVREDLEG View Post
The kid is your "common ground".
Start there. Not about buy or rent. Stable home life.

Safe neighborhood where junior can play at the park and ride a bike.
Good schools where junior can flourish.
Good advice.

So... where else (aside from Chicago area) do you folks think you'll want to move to?
(and rent when you get there as well btw)
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Old 01-27-2018, 11:37 AM
 
7,031 posts, read 3,747,193 times
Reputation: 8356
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dad01 View Post
I

I think I can make a better investment BY NOT BUYING A HOUSE
as I will have
1- more time for my son
2-more time to spend on my health
3-more time to work and earn more money
4-less taxes and maintainence costs

the key is to find relatively affordable rent and I'm prepared to live in a place further out in the burbs/country as long as its safe and schools are good

what do you think ?
For what it's worth, I think your reasoning is sound.

Compromise with your girlfriend by RENTING a house, even if it means moving a bit further out.

That way, she gets a house to live in, and you get the ability to skip out any time you decide to without any long term commitment or risk. (Don't be surprised though if you break up down the road and she sues you for enough child support to allow her and your son to continue living in a house)

If, in a couple of years, you are still together as a couple (you'll always be connected through your son, of course), you can then revisit the issue of buying a house together.

As I said earlier, if you haven't already written and signed a will that puts all of your assets into a trust for your son, managed by one of your siblings, should you die without other legal heirs, tie that up as soon as possible.

Good luck!
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Old 01-27-2018, 02:23 PM
 
3,750 posts, read 2,906,245 times
Reputation: 11937
With everything the OP is saying and reading between the lines, I see no good reason whatsoever to buy a house. None. You should be able to rent a really nice house for a year or two while seeing how things settle out between you two.
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Old 01-27-2018, 07:10 PM
 
Location: Illinois USA
291 posts, read 147,761 times
Reputation: 211
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrRational View Post
Good advice.

So... where else (aside from Chicago area) do you folks think you'll want to move to?
(and rent when you get there as well btw)
great question

I dont want her to give up her job either so I'm not too keen interested in moving out of the area

unless she agrees to move to northern california where my sister lives but then we will live like paupers there
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