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Old 06-30-2018, 01:32 AM
 
Location: Silicon Valley
2,782 posts, read 1,224,558 times
Reputation: 5105

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For the LIG...Daddy didn't put a ring on it....but depending on the length of time, the State may have. So check first with LIG's legal rights. Assuming she has none, you can deal with the intended. I'd be wary of any estate items that disappear.

The heirs in this instance are in disagreement. Like a divorce, if neither party has enough money to buy out the other, then the house needs to be sold. If one party can buy out the other, and wants to lease to LIG, then they can do that. Otherwise, the hard facts of life is that nobody can afford to support LIG in that capacity. Maybe there's a nice studio and an offer to help move.

I wouldn't let it stay in limbo though. LIG may figure out a way to leverage the property.
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Old 06-30-2018, 01:35 AM
 
Location: Out there somewhere...
38,709 posts, read 45,132,068 times
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This situation is why a revocable trust with a will should be drawn up. It legally spells out the who what and where everything goes and cannot be contested. Saves a lot of hassles.
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Old 06-30-2018, 07:17 AM
 
16,718 posts, read 18,941,250 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GiantRutgersfan View Post
I agree with the lawyer. Have the live in girlfriend pay property taxes + $500 a month for 2 years or so. She pays heat, electric, etc obviously. The son who wants to let her live there can forgo the share of the rent money over the next 2 years. The hard up son can take the money. After 2 years, sell the house and split the money 50/50.

Dad would want the, to let her live there, but maybe not forever. Life does go on afterall.

I don’t see a way everyone will be 100% happy, but that’s fair enough for all involved imo
I would be careful about that... there may be squatter rights when such a transaction take place AND if girlfriend pays property tax, she can have make a LEGAL claim of owning "abandoned" property in some states... best case is to change it to rental property and you need advice from a realtor AND a lawyer... best case is to just evict her and sell the property...
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Old 06-30-2018, 08:07 AM
 
Location: Blue Ridge Mntns., NC
10,266 posts, read 14,121,266 times
Reputation: 8788
Quote:
Originally Posted by emotiioo View Post
As distasteful as it may feel to boot a 70-something woman out of a house she lived in for years it sounds like that's the only solution.

If it were me, I might consider contacting her adult child with whom she was originally planning to stay and enlisting their help in getting her out. A cash gift from the estate would not be out of the question and if there were personal items she wanted to take that didn't matter to me I would let her go crazy with that. But yeah, granny has to go.


Check with an attorney in your state relative to: Common law marriage; etc.; and be sure you have the most recent Will. Be kind. (She may have consulted an attorney also.)
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Old 06-30-2018, 08:24 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
4,703 posts, read 4,853,054 times
Reputation: 11117
Bottom Line: This is not about the tenant/LIG per se. This is about the two executors of the will not agreeing on how to handle the property.

Until the executors come to an agreement, nothing can be done - the property can’t be sold, it can’t be rented, the LIG can’t be asked to vacate or evicted. It remains status quo until the executors agree on how it’s to be handled. This is the problem with having co-executors.
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Old 06-30-2018, 10:09 AM
 
Location: New York, NY
1,630 posts, read 2,291,066 times
Reputation: 2405
Quote:
Originally Posted by Axxlrod View Post
Get the LIG out asap. The longer she is allowed to stay, the more problematic it will be to get her out.

Next step will be for LIG to suddenly remember that the loving, deceased boyfriend wanted her to have the house as her own. Forever. And she will make a claim for it.

Get her out.

That's exactly what I'm going through. All 3 of us agreed upon my father's death, the title/ownership of the home goes to me (only child). Now she's singing a different tune... Get her out quickly.
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Old 06-30-2018, 10:32 AM
 
Location: New York, NY
1,630 posts, read 2,291,066 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kgryfon View Post
So...let's see if I have this right...LIG's not paying a cent to live there, and heir #1 is living with heir #2 because heir #1 is in financial difficulties. Heir #1 is the one that wants LIG to stay. Heir #2, who is supporting their own family PLUS heir #1, wants to sell the house and have LIG move back with her own child.


If I understand this correctly, essentially heir #1 wants to let the LIG stay in the house at no cost to LIG (i.e. she has no income and is not paying any bills right now), while heir #2 pays all the expenses for LIG, heir #1, and their own family!


Of course heir #1 can afford to be magnanimous! It's not his/her money that's paying for everyone! Poor heir #2. I venture to say that heir #1 has little to no grasp of how to handle financial matters, hence why they have already screwed their own finances up. I would pay attention to the person who would be footing the bill for this fiasco - heir #2. When/if heir #1 is able to start footing half of the bill for LIG and all of the bill for themselves, then they can have an equal opinion. Why is heir #1 selling their own sibling down the river in favor of some woman their dad met a few years ago and let move in with him?


Give LIG a set time period to move out, and a small portion of the sales profit if they feel like being generous. The longer it takes to get her out, the harder it will be, especially since she's already making remarks. 5-6 years is nothing in the larger picture of things, and they don't owe her anything more than that.

Your comment was so good I had to shout!
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Old 06-30-2018, 10:55 AM
 
1,780 posts, read 882,155 times
Reputation: 3813
Quote:
Originally Posted by desperatedogadvice View Post
This is what is happening.

One heir has no money. Injured and lost a job as a result. Living with sibling who is the other heir. Sibling has children, one of whom is about to start college.

Sibling with kids wants LIG to stay not out of deep affection but out of guilt. Kicking an elderly woman out of a home is not the most emotionally palatable activity for most people.

Heir with no money wants to sell the house so that they can move into a place of their own as well as see their sibling easily pay for college for the kids. Neither sibling is living the high life so to speak-- the one who is doing better financially lives in a very average suburban home and works full time. So the proceeds from the sale would be welcome.

Both inheritors are arguing over the right thing to do. No one is selling anyone down the river.
AGAIN to those who are blaming one heir or another, the OP explained above.
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Old 06-30-2018, 10:57 AM
 
6,015 posts, read 2,708,559 times
Reputation: 5220
It appears from what has been said by the OP that LIG does not have the means/income to pay for the upkeep and expenses associated with this house.

So, whatever Dad's wishes were he did LIG a favor by not leaving it to her. Surely, he didn't expect his kids to support her for what could conceivably be another twenty years when he didn't apparently leave a pile of cash for them to do so and on top of that they barely have any relationship with her. Likely Dad also knew LIG had the casita and her kids to go back to if something happened to him.

What's now unknown is whether LIG is up to a plan to get something out of the estate or whether or not she is just immobilized by grief and as a result doing nothing until she has to. The only way to speed up the process is to talk to her and tell her the heirs plan to sell the house and give her whatever time deemed reasonable to move out. She will react and they can go from there.
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Old 06-30-2018, 12:34 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,506 posts, read 15,977,386 times
Reputation: 38909
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondy View Post
It appears from what has been said by the OP that LIG does not have the means/income to pay for the upkeep and expenses associated with this house.

So, whatever Dad's wishes were he did LIG a favor by not leaving it to her. Surely, he didn't expect his kids to support her for what could conceivably be another twenty years when he didn't apparently leave a pile of cash for them to do so and on top of that they barely have any relationship with her. Likely Dad also knew LIG had the casita and her kids to go back to if something happened to him.

What's now unknown is whether LIG is up to a plan to get something out of the estate or whether or not she is just immobilized by grief and as a result doing nothing until she has to. The only way to speed up the process is to talk to her and tell her the heirs plan to sell the house and give her whatever time deemed reasonable to move out. She will react and they can go from there.
Excellent points.


The GF may be "paralyzed with grief" and not wanting to make a decision or may be thinking ahead to a long range plan of having her BF's children support her for the rest of her life (possible 20 or 30 more years) or anything in between.
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