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We are fight over all sort of trivia things, like, how much should we feed the baby, how we should sleep train him...
Our baby have severe eczema. He is 7 months already, but he still couldn't sleep well because of it. I tried very hard to control my diet for a long time. I don't feel healthy anymore.
I totally sympathize with your predicament.
Having a baby come into your life is a very stressful ordeal - but it doesn't have to be. Have you spoken with your pediatrician about the recommended guidelines for feeding your child? You don't want to give too little, but you don't want to give too much either. My son had colic for the first 8 weeks - he couldn't sleep and we couldn't sleep either (up every two hours like clockwork, then after feeding took another hour to calm him down) on top of it my wife was breastfeeding meaning it was a virtual experiment, what foods could she eat so as not to upset my son's still developing digestive system. And yes, we occasionally have diagreements but not to the point of yelling. Babies and kids are extremely perceptive in picking up on things - the yelling is not healthy for you, your husband and your son.
Speak to your doctor about ppd and the pediatrician about your concerns. Good Luck!
I would agree to talk to your doctor. I have a daughter a little younger than yours and I don't know what exactly you have tried sleeping-wise...but feed the baby some cereal before bed if formula isn't working...it will sit longer in the baby's stomache. Also, while the two of you are arguing about scheduling the baby's sleep, feeding etc., you're not getting anything resolved. Babies truly are a blessing and you and your husband should enjoy spending time together...the three of you. It's what family is all about.
Something that my hubby and I try to do is to have a date night once a week or every other. Nothing fancy...a grandparent will babysit and we'll go to our local theater ($3 per person!), maybe out to a quick dinner, even going to get groceries with just the two of us or maybe make a dinner together. It is a great time to have conversation regarding the two of you and to work out anything you may have had conflicts about.
So, call your doctor, enjoy having a family together and make time for you two once in a while.
#1. You guys are going through a transition period. With baby you now have a completely different way of life and that takes time to get into a routine. Both of you are probably very sleep deprived so it might be a good idea to take turns on helping with the baby. Maybe one night you are the one on call and the other night he's the one on call. Hopefully you guys will be able to get some sleep.
#2. Hollering. Honestly, is your man hard of hearing? No effective communication occurs when someone is yelling. You might think you are getting your point across but the other party stops listening when they feel they have to defend themselves. No one likes to be greated with confrontation and anger every time they come home.
#3. Divorce, come on. Don't just run when things are difficult. Stick it out. I would hope you have more conversations geared towards: Babe, we gotta make this work and divorce is not an option. What do you think? Wow babe- we are both so exhausted with _______. No one said it would be like this. When you say things like that, WITHOUT SCREAMING THESE WORDS, it allows for him to "join you" in the feelings you have regarding being a new mother.
#4. You are cut out to be a mother. You know how I know. Because there is no turning back once you delivered that baby. LOL. Now we don't wanna see you on Oprah with your teenages with 80 tat's and piercings talking about how they felt they got in the way of your life.
#5. Breathe
#6. While mom was keeping the baby that was time to take the anger down a notch, remember the man you dated and married. As hard as it might seem. A relaxing candle light bath together, a few glasses or wine, and turning off all cell phones and home phones for at least an hour would do more relating to one another than any essay of issues. I don't want to suggest other things aren't going on but this is a great way to open communication after relating to one another. During bath or "relating" time it is never a good idea to bring up issues.
it can be post partum depression or not, but whatever it is just know that a baby doesn't ruin any relationship. if the relationship ends, it wouldnt be accurate or fair to the child to blame him/her. your relationships is in the hands of yourself and your partner, no one else. BUT, having a baby can make things more challenging because of the sacrifices one must make to meet the demands of the child. it's a stage that all parenting couples go through, due to the exhaustion mostly, but hang in there and as the baby gets older it MIGHT ease a little bit of the stress and allowing you and your partner to calm down and have things figured out. i hope all goes well.
This is a typical problem with having a kid. It seems like such a great idea, you get all the attention and praise while you're pregnant, then once birth, reality hits. You're life now will completely revolve around the child. 3am screaming, going out together is like planing a vacation,... Making a baby is often the biggest decision/change anyone can make in their life, and it sounds like both of you made the wrong one.
Baby's not ruining your relationship, just shifting things around a little.
It'll all work out, just you wait and see.
I agree with this!!
Its a huge adjustment. Baby just adds to the joy, but we don`t see that!
I say, explain your feelings to your SO, be upfront, and honest.
Take a break, and please... take time for each other!!!!!!!
I haven't read all the threads here, however, this statement a lone breaks my heart, truly ... Have you been checked out for postpartum depression ?? A baby is a beautiful blessed gift and I can't even imagine not enjoying it, or resenting it in any way. The moment it's born there should be an instant, magnetic, and nurturing feeling, emotion, and mother instinct developed and in place. And, trust me, from a therapists point of view, if you don't love this baby, this newly born child feels those emotions when you reach down to give it the attention it needs at that early age! It's an issue- seek help.
Heart breaking !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That's nonsense, lots of people don't have parental instincts and it shows! And those who do do not always get it immediately, either . Please don't give old grandmother's ''advice''!
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