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What is a player? Someone that plays a game (whether it be sports, dating, or whatever else)
Why do you keep insisting having game is not the same as being a player.
Jesus Christ. Fine, you want to be technical about it.
Player = participant in a game.
Someone can be a player in a sport and be absolutely horrible, but they're still a player. Now apply that logic to the dating game. Would you call someone who is horrible with women a "player"? Of course not.
Your hypertechnical connection of the terms DOES NOT WORK.
You need to understand that the contemporary definition of a player in the dating world is someone who lies and misleads his way to *****, the "tell her you love her to get her in bed" act.
But that type of change is good/natural change. Like I said, I've changed a lot in the past 5 years but the change was natural. But like I also said, I'm nowhere near a ladies man despite the change.
And the alcoholic who goes sober and the fat person who quits eating crap and starts exercising are all going through "good/natural" change.
And some people are content to be fat too, but yet they still want to be skinny. Just like them, you want to be successful with woman too but you lack the willpower to do something about it so you try convincing yourself that you're ok with the way things are going.
The reason I wanted a relationship was for the status symbol of having a girlfriend. I was jealous of people with girlfriends and felt left out.
But as an observer, I've come to the conclusion that relationships are more work than they're worth. I don't want to commit to a relationship. I don't want to devote so much to something I don't truly want.
Sure, the status symbol of being in a relationship is nice, but it's not worth the effort.
To think about this in another way: My dad makes a lot of money, so that's a good status symbol. I'd like to be able to afford the stuff he can afford. But I'm not willing to work as hard as him. Once again, the status symbol is not worth the effort.
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So don't bite off more than you can chew. Just like in sports, you don't start off trying to play like an all-star against top level competition. You train and do drills in practice, acquiring more and more skill as you go on.
But if someone doesn't touch a basketball until they're 40, the chances of them becoming Lebron James are slim to none.
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Looking at it from the girl's perspective, which is essentially what you asked me to do, they definitely suck.
They suck at relationships. I'm not debating that.
But just because they suck at relationships doesn't mean they suck at life.
There are girls that think I would suck at being their boyfriend, but that doesn't mean they think I suck as a person.
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No, you can't blame lack of money because lack of money can be overcome with decent game. That would be like a fat person blaming food for making them fat, rather than their own lack of self control.
But when you overcome it simply by being loaded, you're only gonna attract golddiggers.
Yes, gold diggers will be attracted to that.
But I don't think gold diggers are the only people you would attract.
If I was rich, some girl might think "I'm not into his personality. But I find him attractive, and he's successful. So I guess I'm willing to give him a chance"
But since I'm not rich, the same girl would think "I'm not into his personality" and leave it at that
Something tells me this will be a recurring theme in your life.
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But if someone doesn't touch a basketball until they're 40, the chances of them becoming Lebron James are slim to none.
So because you can't go from absolutely zero skill to becoming one of the best in a professional sport, you just say screw it and don't try. This too, will probably be a recurring theme in your life.
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They suck at relationships. I'm not debating that. But just because they suck at relationships doesn't mean they suck at life.
How do we know they suck at relationships? The only information that you gave us is that they have personalities that turn women off (hence, they suck) but one has money and the one doesn't.
Quit trying to move the goalposts.
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And lack of game can be overcome with money
And a lack of money can be overcome with game. What's so hard to understand about that?
But if someone changes just to get a girlfriend, that's not good/natural change
So it's not good/natural change to stop drinking so you can be sober and function like a normal adult?
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Originally Posted by city_data91
When people pretend to be someone they're not, that's not natural.
Is the alcoholic who turns sober pretending to be something he's not?
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