A Severely Limiting Requirement (dating, boyfriends, married, women)

[DennyCrane]

Do you have a requirement for what you look for in a partner that you find severely limits your options? Maybe you're a woman who makes A LOT of money and don't want a man who makes less than you. Maybe you're a guy who's really short and don't want a woman who's taller than you. Maybe you're like me and you're not religious and would prefer someone who's also not religious. Usually, people who have such requirements don't treat them casually. Chances are, they've arrived at those requirements through a great deal of thought and a lot of experience. My question is do you have such a requirement and have you ever found yourself debating whether you need to be more flexible on it? How did it turn out? Was it a mistake or one of the smartest things you ever did? I'm especially curious to hear from the latter group. As we get older, we do seem to become more flexible on some things and more inflexible on others.

[TaoistDude]

I looked for an attractive atheist/agnostic/Buddhist/Taoist single/divorced highly libidinous martial artist with a positive attitude, interested in books, hiking, sci-fi, and travel, with INFJ personality type, and kids (if any) no more than a couple years younger than my own.

I was willing to compromise, of course, to some extent. However, I DID find her, and she was (and still is) even better than I could have imagined!

[JSizzle225]

Women who drink store brand soda. Terrible.

[OngletNYC]

Yes: Fat guys. As I get older, the dating pool is getting fatter. The competition is fierce for a fit, attractive man in my age range, so I wonder if it is time to downgrade my expectations. I haven't done so yet, but I have thought about it.

[Nite Ryder]

Now that you mention it, if i were still single and looking for a lady to become a life partner, I would have a couple requirements that would have to be met. I've always felt this way, so I don't think age or advancing age would have anything to do with my requirements. I try to be flexible and easy to get along with, but there are things where I'm very inflexible (knowing I have to live with myself first).

One of my requirements, I've said it before, and it probably sounds stupid to you, is: #1. Any woman I would want as a life partner would have to be able to dance, keep rythm. carry a tune. #2. Be a political conservative or 'middle of the road' woman with no liberal stances and unwilling to support liberal causes. Meaning she wouldn't believe anything she heard from the news media. My life partner and I have been married for 18 years, we have very few disagreements, and arguments are few, almost non-existent.

[jeepgirl27]

Originally Posted by DennyCrane

Do you have a requirement for what you look for in a partner that you find severely limits your options? Maybe you're a woman who makes A LOT of money and don't want a man who makes less than you. Maybe you're a guy who's really short and don't want a woman who's taller than you. Maybe you're like me and you're not religious and would prefer someone who's also not religious. Usually, people who have such requirements don't treat them casually. Chances are, they've arrived at those requirements through a great deal of thought and a lot of experience. My question is do you have such a requirement and have you ever found yourself debating whether you need to be more flexible on it? How did it turn out? Was it a mistake or one of the smartest things you ever did? I'm especially curious to hear from the latter group. As we get older, we do seem to become more flexible on some things and more inflexible on others.

As much as I love my boyfriend, and we dont live together.
But I told him I wont wait for him..If something were to happen,
You see his daughter is almost 21 and is extremely lazy..
She did recently gotten a job..thats good, and my boyfriend told me she was going to have to start paying her own bills, and that hasnt happened,, before he was paying her cell, car insurance, gas, credit card, this is when she didnt have a job.
My boyfriend does all the house cleaning and all the cooking.
I told him it was a shame she wasnt doing it. Or at least help out.
I also told him, thank god my kids werent like thats
I let him know there is no way she would live with us and not help out,
I told him she needs guidance and he wasnt helping her any. She needs a parent right now.
Dont get me wrong she is very nice...but niceness dont pay the bills.
Even her boyfriends parents said she needs to be more responsible
I told my boyfriend he better not give me any excuses saying he cant afford to take me out...because he dont have enough money..I told him if he could afford to pay all his daughters wants then he can afford to take me out ...I also treat him too..
He also said he was struggling, he lives in a one bedroom apt. I live in a 2 bedroom apt .makes more than me, and he is struggling,
So I told him, he is choosing to struggle.
So he knows where I stand. I dont care what he does in his own house, he just wont do it if we end up living together,

[DennyCrane]

Originally Posted by OngletNYC

Yes: Fat guys. As I get older, the dating pool is getting fatter. The competition is fierce for a fit, attractive man in my age range, so I wonder if it is time to downgrade my expectations. I haven't done so yet, but I have thought about it.

Thank you. You've given me extra incentive to continue eating right and exercising daily. In a few years, I'll be in my 40s. If I can stay in the same shape I'm in now, it sounds like it'll really give me an advantage over other guys. I just hope I still have hair.

[Galagaone]

Originally Posted by DennyCrane

Do you have a requirement for what you look for in a partner that you find severely limits your options? Maybe you're a woman who makes A LOT of money and don't want a man who makes less than you. Maybe you're a guy who's really short and don't want a woman who's taller than you. Maybe you're like me and you're not religious and would prefer someone who's also not religious. Usually, people who have such requirements don't treat them casually. Chances are, they've arrived at those requirements through a great deal of thought and a lot of experience. My question is do you have such a requirement and have you ever found yourself debating whether you need to be more flexible on it? How did it turn out? Was it a mistake or one of the smartest things you ever did? I'm especially curious to hear from the latter group. As we get older, we do seem to become more flexible on some things and more inflexible on others.

I require that my partners favorite bird is a swallow..

[Braunwyn]

I've pretty much only dated vegetarians most of my life/dating years. Even tho veg's make up a small percentage of the population (2%?), I never had a problem. My dh, OTOH, was not a veg when we met, so we had to compromise. He went pescetarian and that worked out for us. Diet wasn't the only ideal I had for a relationship, but the rest just fell into place for us.

[Northside904]

If something was out of her control (like a disability of some sort) then I'd overlook that as long as she had other reedeeming qualities. Everything else I'm not budging and I expect her to hold me to the same standard.