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I was having this discussion with a female friend of mine -- both of us are gainfully employed, BTW -- the other day. I was quite astounded by the number of female acquaintances we had who didn't believe that they should work. They believe that a man should take care of them financially, apart and aside from the raising kids issue. I even know one childfree woman who thought this.
I think that men these days are far less tolerant of women who think that they're put on earth to be taken care of them, and maybe it's just because we live in a conservative part of the country that I seem to run into so many of these types of people.
I also think that it's a really foolish idea. If you believe in statistics, roughly fifty percent of married couples end up getting divorced, and women need to be prepared for this potential outcome. My own mom told me to always make my own money -- it didn't matter if I made less than my husband, but I should make at least enough to support myself, if I ever needed to.
What do the rest of you say? Are the days of women staying at home and being support by a man (for their entire lives) pretty much over?
Fewer and fewer women are staying home and relying on men for financial support. It is one of the things which has enabled more divorces. Women, as a group, are no longer financially dependent.
As a man, I would not enter into a relationship with a woman who was looking for a free ride.
when looking at the expense of a car, insurance, gas, child care,
(and some folks hire a cleaning lady) that would be a potential savings
the expense of a dishwasher/dryer/electricity- when she could be hanging the clothes out and washing the dishes
she could also be tending the garden, canning veggies for the winter
clipping coupons-be an extreme coupon fanatic
also, a good hearty woman, can be chopping wood for the woodstove-good exercise and mow the lawn
and she'd have plenty of time to cook, so would save money of going out to eat
you take all this into consideration, and she wanted to stay home, it could make sense.
I think that a woman should stay home with the kids for at least 5 years if she/they can afford it.
I don't get why woman have kids and return to work a few weeks/months later and have other people raise their child.
Also, I find it unfair that a woman has to work, take care of the kids, the household, the husband - come on, really? And then guys complain that women dont cook anymore after work and always want to eat out. That's just way too much to handle. No wonder are they cranky and unhappy.
I don't have children.
Right now I work full time + college full time because I am single. But when I will have a stable relationship again, I will cut back on work. Sharing bills = less income needed = less working = more fun. So ideally I work 30 hours/week + maybe 10 hours of work around the house.
Also, I am very traditional when it comes to relationships: I wash, I cook, run errands, I clean the house and do all the womenly stuff at home. So, when HE comes home, there is NOTHING he has to do. For saving a cleaning lady, landscaper, eating out, and a personal assistant, I think I deserve that HE maybe pays 2/3 of the rent/mortgage. I do everything that Mainebrokerman said and yes, it makes sense.
when looking at the expense of a car, insurance, gas, child care,
(and some folks hire a cleaning lady) that would be a potential savings
the expense of a dishwasher/dryer/electricity- when she could be hanging the clothes out and washing the dishes
she could also be tending the garden, canning veggies for the winter
clipping coupons-be an extreme coupon fanatic
also, a good hearty woman, can be chopping wood for the woodstove-good exercise and mow the lawn
and she'd have plenty of time to cook, so would save money of going out to eat
you take all this into consideration, and she wanted to stay home, it could make sense.
Wow, I can only assume that you wrote this tongue-in-cheek.
That type of woman is my Better Half's biggest nightmare!
Maybe, just maybe, they are interested in devoting themselves to more than just sitting at home, or raising kids. Maybe they actually enjoy maintaining and furthering their carreers.
I don't think it makes sense to say, a woman should work IN CASE THE MARRIAGE doesn't last. That is BS.
I used to think the same as you -- and I think there might be a big gap in our ages and life experience -- but now that all of my female friends (with kids) are divorced, save one, and I see how much they struggle trying to pay rent, put food on the table and save for retirement, I have a different take on things. Some of the marriages I thought would never ever fail -- that I would have bet all of my life savings on -- did fail, and it really took me by surprise.
I'm divorced, and no, I never expected that to happen either. I can't imagine what my quality of life would be like now had I quit working or put my career on the back-burner.
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