Older Women with Wrinkles Are Sexy (Asian, love, attracted, attractiveness)

[Visvaldis]

Greetings to you all.
I am an older man, not ancient. I have wrinkles myself.
For many years I have wondered why so many women go into a panic when they see wrinkles in their faces. Personally, I find such women very attractive. In my view, wrinkles add personality, enhance a pretty face, and are a sign of maturity.
Why do they spend billions of dollars for various creams and treatments which probably don't work anyway.
I'd like to hear from women, of all ages, what they think of wrinkles on a woman. Does it lower the confidence? Are wrinkles considered as flaws? Are wrinkles preventing women from finding a mate?
As for the younger women, are you terrified to reach 35?
Also, please mention approximately how much money you spend every month to fight wrinkles.
Please, try to keep this from becoming a woman to woman advice forum about the best ways to fight wrinkles.
Maybe there are other men who also think wrinkles are attractive and sexy.

[sun queen]

Yeah right...wrinkles r attractive? I actually agree with u though I don't have any yet. Older women are beautiful, but u do not see their beauty celebrated. It seems like men prefer a more youthful appearance so women must do whatever they can to look younger. I do not spend lots of money on creams and potions with promises of eternal youth. I just think u do what u can to take care of yourself the best u can. Looking good for me is more about mental well being and health than it is trying to find my inner-super model. I just wish more men felt as u do...then women would be valued on the basis of there contribution to humanity rather than the sum total of their body parts.

[VillageLife]

Is it very,very wrinkled? If just a few,but not like too much,I would feel ok,If too many then it means you are not taking care of yourself.Would you want a woman who doesn't take care of themselves?

[birdrgal]

Visvaldis, thank you for your post!

I'm 57 so of course I now have some wrinkles. When I first started getting them (at about 48) they did upset me somewhat because I'd always looked about 10 years younger than my real age (through lucky genes!). I think most women react the same at first. It's because society and marketing and the media always put such emphasis on youth. We're brainwashed practically from birth to think that "young is beautiful, old is undesireable". Mostly from people and companies who profit from people thinking that way! Cosmetic companies make lots of money by convincing women that wrinkles are something that needs to be fixed (in other words, a flaw).

It's hard to resist that kind of indoctrination but I think/hope that more and more women are trying.

Here's what I see is still the problem. It's great that more older actresses like Helen Mirren, Katharine Hepburn, Candice Bergen etc are now being celebrated for the beauties they STILL ARE (or were, for Kate) instead of being thrown on the Hollywood scrap heap like before. But these are all women with great bone structure and charisma who would still look gorgeous at age 100. Most women aren't blessed that way and know it, so they go into attack mode to try and stave off what's perceived as a slide into undesirableness or ugliness or whatever. And the cosmetics companies and plastic surgeons etc are all to happy to offer to help us try to do that!

So yes wrinkles will lower our confidence if we let it.

I think most women THINK wrinkles will lower the chances of finding a mate (or even a date) but I'm not sure whether that comes more from our lower confidence in our looks or because we assume men aren't able or willing to look past the surface (guess that's a whole other topic!). Probably some of both.

Honestly I stopped caring about whether or not I have wrinkles, at the same time that I outgrew the mindset that I "needed" to be in a relationship. Luckily, that was shortly after the wrinkles first appeared! Once I realized that being independent and relationship-free was what made me truly happy, I was also able to accept myself for what I am rather than what others might see me as. And I then no longer cared about wrinkles, present or future.

I wouldn't waste a minute of my time with any man who judged me by how many wrinkles I have, or for that matter how old I am or how old I look.

I don't spend any money to "fight wrinkles" and never have. I don't even wear makeup unless it's what I call a "State Occasion" and that happens maybe 6 times a year. I use a plain basic oil-free moisturizer and I use sunscreen in the summer but that's to prevent sunburn because I have very fair skin, not because I'm afraid of getting wrinkles. I know I'll get more and more wrinkles as I age (sorry dragonten, but every woman will eventually get lots of wrinkles and it has nothing to do with whether or not she takes care of herself; it's mostly genetics but can be accelerated by things like sun damage and ping-pong weight loss/gain) but it doesn't distress me enough to spend time or money trying to fend off the inevitable!

There was a tv commercial a while back, I think it was for a bank (?) that showed photos of the same subject with one-word opposite points of view about it. One was the face of an elderly Asian lady with many wrinkles. The words for her were "frail" and "strong". I think it's sad that the knee-jerk reaction to an older woman with wrinkles would probably be "frail", but I thought she looked both "strong" and "beautiful".

When/if most other people react the same way I did , then we'll truly have come a long way, baby!

[Visvaldis]

Originally Posted by dragonten

Is it very,very wrinkled? If just a few,but not like too much,I would feel ok,If too many then it means you are not taking care of yourself.Would you want a woman who doesn't take care of themselves?

Wrinkles are natural and do not indicate self-neglect. As long as they keep themselves clean I don't see a problem.
I've seen many women who have wrinkles on their foreheads, around the eyes, the cheeks, the chin, and neck...and still they looked very nice. I also like hands like that. Wrinkles are natural. It's too bad that many women feel degraded by their own wrinkles.

[Rainy]

If too many then it means you are not taking care of yourself.

BS, "too many wrinkles" could very well mean that you're 90 years old and have managed to take care of yourself just fine.

[NOTAM]

sorry but restylane and fillers will be part of the necessary budgetary expenses for me. i refuse to get old

[birdrgal]

Originally Posted by bellestaroftexas

sorry but restylane and fillers will be part of the necessary budgetary expenses for me. i refuse to get old

We're all (if we're lucky ) going to get old. The real question is, if it matters (or should matter) to us or to others whether or not we look whatever age we really are.

I saw a birthday card the other day. It said "How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?"

That got me to thinking. If I didn't know how old I was and had no way to find out, via records or science or medicine, how old would I think I was? I would just say "What the heck, who cares?", because after all, what does it really matter? Other than being old enough to vote at 18 and old enough to qualify for Medicare at 65 and Social Security at 66, everything else is negotiable, LOL!

[Visvaldis]

Why fight age?
I personally don't feel attracted to living Barbie Dolls.
As for the actresses mentioned, yes they aged gracefully and still retained an attractiveness. One woman, who I think had a problem with aging was Mary Tyler Moore. She was a very pretty young woman. She might have been a pretty older woman. But her obvious cosmetic make over is embarrassing to look at. She looks like a freak.
One post said too bad more men don't think like me...how do you know they don't?

[Miss Blue]

Hey, Vis..You like wrinkles Well honey , you would love meI would say that I am one of the oldest persons on all of cd I have never contemplated or wanted plastic surgery, botox or any of those things that make you look scaryI am fair complected and blue eyed , I also love the sun, and when I was young we didn't know about sunblock. I used to spend hours sunbathing when I was a teenager and young adult..I don't regret a minute of it. Genetics also plays a role. My mom was allergic to the sun and very seldom went out, and she had a lot of wrinkles too. One time one of my very young grandchildren asked me why I had lines in my face, and I told him that every line represented a story. He said "Mamaw, you have a LOT of stories,right?" I don't spend big amounts of money on cremes and fixes, just a lot of moisturizer and very light makeup.